Other Character Email Gunhaver/Virus Remake

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Contents

Summary

Gunhaver gets a virus, and havoc ensues.

Cast (in order of appearance): Gunhaver, The Virus(es) Reloaded, Bubs, Fightrip, Flashfight, Crackotage, Blue Laser, Blue Laser Minions, Markie, Reynold, Firebert, Strong Bad, Tampo, It, Tam-Tim-Tom, James, Super Generic Name, Markie a.k.a. An unnecessary long and complicated name!, That One Kid Named... Uh... Stan?, Rainman, Glitchell111, Wedginator999, Crazy Moonman, Vector Strong Bad

Page Title: 0r4n63 02???

Transcript

{Cut to Gunhaver in front of the damaged Orange 02, where he types in "gunhaver_email.exe".}

GUNHAVER: Email, the sending of messages by electronic means from one computer to one or more recipients via a network. Email, the sending of messages by electronic means from one computer to one or more recipients via a network. Email, the sending of messages by electronic means from one computer to one or more recipients via a network. {Pause} That was totally out-of-character for me.

{Gunhaver presses a button to make the following email appear.}

GUNHAVER: {reading} First Himjsbert... jist jist at upit VIP, yert... I quit. This is too complicated for me to read. Well email, it's time for you to go to the land of the dead. DELETED!!!!

{Gunhaver presses a button, and suddenly, this appears on the Orange's screen.}

GUNHAVER: What??? Another virus? Man, those guys who make viruses have minds as filthy as the guy who made the NSMC troll bot. NO!

{Gunhaver presses 2 on the keyboard, making the Orange's screen suddenly explode in Gunhaver's face, sending Gunhaver flying away. Then the inner parts of the Orange explode before a large, multicolored, electric arm appears.}

THE VIRUS(ES) RELOADED: 4h! Y35! Y0u 4r3 50 pr3d1c74b|3 4nd 50 57up1d! N0w 1 w1|| 57r1k3!!!!!!!!!!!

GUNHAVER: Uh... what the crap were you just saying?

THE VIRUS(ES) RELOADED: O. Me sorry. I no speak Engrish 2 well. You die man.

{Gunhaver gets out his pistol.}

GUNHAVER: Oh yeah? Well, eat this!

{Gunhaver shoots at the arm. Suddenly, the arm turns the bullet into Bubs' head.}

BUBS' HEAD: My name's Bubs! This is my regular voice!

GUNHAVER: Whoa. That's weird.

THE VIRUS(ES) RELOADED: N0w y0u h4v3 533n my p0w3r!!!!!! B360n3!

{The arm extend and grabs Gunhaver, who is straining to get out of its grip. Then the arm throws Gunhaver into a wall, only he goes through it.}

THE VIRUS(ES) RELOADED: H3 w45 700 345y! N0w 70 d537r0y 7h3 5-5-54M un1v3r53!!!!!!

{Something electric and multicolored flies out of the remains of the Orange 02, taking the arm with it. Cut to a grey background. The Cheat Commandos logo (it says "w00t!! DAKFJSD$@#)(*&^%$#@! NSMC rulez!!!") appears and flies around randomly.}

ANNOUNCER: Wir kommen jetzt zum hoffnungslosen Schokolade Kommando-Fabrik-Ravioli-Erscheinen zurück?

{Cut to the glitched up Cheat Commandos HQ, where parts of the building and background are flying around, flashing, and are doing other weird stuff. Cut to a (glitched-up) room in the HQ, where Fightgar and Silent Rip have been conjoined, Flashfight is a pixelated sprite, and Crackotage is a black-and-white preschool-quality drawing of himself.}

FIGHTRIP: OMG! LIEK! WAT R WE GONNA Do NOW???

FLASHFIGHT: {emits beeps while flapping his arms}

CRACKOTAGE: Hello gentlemen. I think I shall take you to the chocolate factory.

{Suddenly, the background turns into a cross between a chocolate factory, a volcano, and a 1980s platformer video game.}

FLASHFIGHT: {emits distorted noises}

FIGHTRIP: w00t11 4 v4caion! HAHAHAH|-|@|-|@|-|@@! WERESORANDOM!

{Cut to the Blue Laser HQ, which is colored pink and has an excerpt from a dictionary on the walls. Blue Laser is also colored pink with his limbs flying around and changing forms, his logo changing letters every second, and an eyepatch that's growing smaller every second. His minions are multicolored, have flying limbs as well, and one of them is changing forms with the Internet Explorer logo.}

BLUE LASER: {distorted} Oh crap! This sucks! I'm not shouting!

A MINION: BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRP!!!!

ANOTHER MINION: 1 |1|<3 (|-|33$3 @|\|[) |=|@|\/|1|\|6 |\/|03$.

{Suddenly, the background changes into a happy, grassy field with a rainbow. A pink and cute unicorn appears.}

BLUE LASER: {distorted} Who the crap are you?

UNICORN: I'm Markie, a unicorn PrincessHomestar found on LisaFrank.com!

{Suddenly, Markie gets red eyes and grows fangs and spikes.}

MARKIE: Now DIE!!!!!!

{Markie chases Blue Laser and his minions all around the field, the "walls" of the screen, and on the rainbow while a cliche background chase music is playing.}

{Cut to a room in the Cheat Commandos HQ, where the background is a cross between The Screen room's wall and level 1 from Stinkoman 20X6. Reynold is there, constantly changing shapes and teleporting around the room while Firebert is the action figure version of himself. The Firebert action figures continuously multiply, explode, and revive.}'

ReynoldS: (talks with an overlarge mouth] yOU"VE GOT TO DO THE DANCE NONE other than the d4nc3 c4lled 3r0 zer0! 3r0 zer0!

{While this happens, the wall of the screen on the left starts to break. The words "AHHH!! SEIZURES!!11 flash on the screen for a millisecond thrice. Suddenly, the scene stops before it turns into the static that you'd see on a TV. Strong Bad walks onscreen.}

STRONG BAD: Oh! How original! Some idiot gets a virus and the whole world is screwed up. {shouted} USE SOME ORIGINAL PLOTS ALREADY!!!

(Then Tampo, dressed as Robin {from Batman}, appears from nowhere,)

Tampo: Yeah!

Strong bad: Like you're any better!

(At this point, the wall brekas/*

tempo: At least I had action scenes!

'Sb sucks!: Oh, you want to take it outside?

8rainarina: Yeah! I want to take it out for a walk! come here it1

{Suddenly, a creature shaped like the words IT appears and starts teleporting around the scene, making places reveal the binary code version that... ah forget it! I cant trnascribe this stupid piece of cra afdt4oq5u45yt-w i24g[ytr gue545itu54q0ruewr0guw D AHH!!! MOMMY! I'm BEING ATAEKJFQW$)TQ $A

{Cut to this.}

OCE Gunhaver: Virus Remake

I think this rules very much! It is my very best Gunhaver email, and I think it is the very best email on the entire Wiki! Vote for this! You won't regret it! -- Tim-Tam-Tom File:Ghaver.png

DECLINE: No. It's too random and uncreative. Plus, you're being to n00bish at the end, where you started breaking the transcription standards. -- James, your master.

SECOND: Never. Ever. Plever. Jever! Jevery!!! JIBEVERY! JIBNEY!!! {starts shouting jibberish} - Super Generic NameGoodbye
THIRD: Uh... {jumps off a cliff} - Markie, a.k.a. an unnecessary long and complicated name!|CHERBS
FOURTH: NO! I don't believe individual emails winning the FotW! - ‡ That One Kid Named Uh... Stan? ‡

DECLINE: Even a person with autism can do better than this! - «Rainman»

COMMENT: Does this affect any of my numerous email shows? - Glitchell11

DECLINE: This sucks. Wedginator999DaAaAaAaA!Image:VHTG_Prize.PNG

DISQUALIFIED: This breaks Transcription Standards with a bulldozer. -- Crazy Moonman Neby Image:bowlerhatsmall.png


{Suddenly, Gunhaver runs onscreen, revealing that the FotW thing was just a wall.}

GUNHAVER: Oh, how the crap do I get out of here?

{Suddenly, a red rectangle is shot at Gunhaver, who ducks before the rectangle can hit the wall where Gunhaver's head was seconds ago. Then Gunhaver gets up and looks to the left and screams. Cut to what Gunhaver's looking at, Vector Strong Bad.}

VECTOR STRONG BAD: I'LL SPLODE YOUR HEAD!!!

{Cut back to Gunhaver. Vector Strong Bad floats into the scene.}

GUNHAVER: Oh no you won't!

{Gunhaver kicks the "DISQUALIFIED" on the wall onto Vector Strong Bad, causing the monstrosity to fall onto the ground, which turns into a cyber quicksand, quickly sucking Vector Strong Bad, the contents of the wall, and the screaming Gunhaver inside. Then there's a flash of light.}

{When the light fades, we see Gunhaver at the damaged Orange 02, which has the following on its screen.}

GUNHAVER: Whoa! I'm here again! Maybe some sort of good force has brought me here to prevent some disaster from happening again. I guess the disaster is the destruction of... my computer! 2!

{Gunhaver presses 2, and a sped-up version of the previous events happen, from The Virus(es) Reloaded throwing Gunhaver into that dimension, to the scene with Fightrip, to the scene with Blue Laser and Markie, to the scene where the universe starts to crumble, to the scene where Gunhaver kicks the "DISQUALIFIED" into Vector Strong Bad. Then there's a quick flash of light as Gunhaver's in front of the Orange again, which is saying the same thing.}

GUNHAVER: Uh, 2?

{Gunhaver presses 2, and the same thing happens again, including Gunhaver pressing 2 aqain, starting the whole virus mess again. However, this time, we stop at the part where Gunhaver is fighting Vector Strong Bad.}

GUNHAVER: You know, maybe this whole repeating thing is supposed to convey to me some kind of message. I wonder what it is. Whatever it is, I need to kick the "DISQUALIFIED" into that flashy thingy.

{Vector Strong Bad shoots a red rectangle at Gunhaver and misses, hitting the "DISQUALIFIED" instead.}

GUNHAVER: Oh crap! Thinking is bad for you!

{Gunhaver backs away from Vector Strong Bad, who inches/floats closer to Gunhaver.}

GUNHAVER: Uh, look. Can we make a deal?

VECTOR STRONG BAD: NO WAY A SPLODE!

GUNHAVER: Interesting. {nervously looks around} Any... OH WHAT THE CRAP?

{Gunhaver kicks the Homsar's Bowler Hat in Crazy Moonman's signature at Vector Strong Bad.}

VECTOR STRONG BAD: WELL, MY HEAD A PWNED.

{Vector Strong Bad blows up, creating a flash of red light. When the light fades, Gunhaver is in front of the Orange 02 with the same question.}

GUNHAVER: All right! All right! I'll press 1!

{Gunhaver puts his hand up in the air, but hesistates. Then he stops. Then he goes under the desk.}

GUNHAVER: {under desk} I wonder if pulling the plug will work.

{Gunhaver pulls the Orange's plug, shutting down the computer. Then he puts the plug back in, turning on the Orange. When Gunhaver gets into his chair, he sees that the message is STILL there.}

GUNHAVER: {sighs} Fine. I guess there's no other choice but to replace you with that Delta 1001 I've been vying for. But I think I has the solution in not destroying you!

{Gunhaver pulls the Orange 02 off the desk (plug and all) and walks off-screen. Then The Paper comes down, saying: Click here to email Gunhaver at gunhaver@homestarrunner.com.}

Easter Eggs

  • Wait for 10 seconds to see the following scene:

{Cut to the basement of the Cheat Commandos HQ. In a corner with junk is the Orange 02, turned on and with the virus message. Some guitar music plays in the background.}

Fun Facts

  • If you want to know, Gunhaver emails, starting from season 7, will use this as a reference to the Orange 02's status, if the need ever arises.
  • Most of the email sent to Gunhaver is made by using the keys on the right of the keys needed to make the version of the email that makes sense.
  • Gunhaver references the NSMC troll bots.
    • This is referenced again
  • This is my first fanstuff with Leetspeak.
  • Bubs' line is from Sample of Style.
  • The announcer says in German, "We now return to the Desperate Chocolate Commando Factory Ravioli Show?" in the part with the Cheat Commandos "opening".
  • A minion references "Flaming Moes", which was a Simpsons episode concerning the drink Flaming Moe.
  • Markie is the unicorn PrincessHomestar found on LisaFrank.com.
  • The break from the Transcription Standards shows the universe's fall to the virus.
  • Strong Bad and Tampo reference virus and virus, respectively.
  • Tampo dressed up as Robin and saying "Yeah!" is a reference to Robin Commander in Space Tree Episode #38 (has some swearing and blood).
  • The Fanstuff of the Week nomination not only refers to Fanstuff of the Week, but also the following:
    • Joshua's name
    • Jibney
    • The fact that Sam is a name used by four users (me, Super Sam, Thatkidsam, and Sahm).
    • Markie's falling off a cliff gag
    • Markie's extended name (Markie and Burninator Boombox)
    • Thatkidsam's belief that individual emails shouldn't win the Fanstuff of the Week.
    • Rain Man (interestingly, a main character of that movie has autism)
    • The fact that Wedginator is based on Homsar, who Homsar (the user) is named after.
    • Mitchell having events in different fanstuff affect his fanstuff. Also, he has owned a number of OCEs and is/has co-owning/co-owned more OCEs.


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