Other Character Email Gunhaver/Cooking
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Summary
Reynold hosts a cooking show. Gunhaver is having a terrible time in Retroville.
Cast (in order of appearance): Reynold, Silent Rip (voice), Fightgar (voice), Marshie, The Sticky's, Topato, Shim-Sham-Sam (the author), Gunhaver (Easter Egg), Gilligan (Easter Egg), Skipper (Easter Egg)
Lines: 49
Transcript
{We go to Reynold in front of the Delta 1001, typingGunhaver_email.exeto get this message:
File not found.}
REYNOLD: Whoops! I typed in the wrong command! Well, that never happened before.
{Then Reynold typesgunhaver_email.exeto make the following email pop up. Reynold reads the email.}
Dear Gunhaver/Reynold,
Does your family have any secret recipes? If so, do tell.
Sincerely,
Fred
(I felt sorry for your inbox)
REYNOLD: {typing} I don't know much about the inbox, for that's the only thing on this computer that Gunhaver guards with a password. Well, since this is for both Gunhaver and me, I'll tell you about Gunhaver's family recipes first. He made a bunch of ridiculous stuff, but not as ridiculous as Gunhaver's Chili-flavored steak with chili, chili sauce, jalapeño pepper, red pepper, green pepper, hot sauce, and other spicy condiments.
{Then we cut to the exterior of the Cheat Commandos HQ, where we hear screaming.}
SILENT RIP: {voice} YEOW! TOO SPICY!!!
FIGHTGAR: {voice} I NEED WATER!!! THAT'S A FIRE EXTINGUISHER! NOT WATER!!!
SILENT RIP: {voice} WHO CARES?
{Suddenly, fire is shot through a wall.}
{Then we cut back to Reynold in front of the Delta 1001.}
REYNOLD: {voice} But mine are more realistic, and stuff like that. I show people how to make my family recipes in cooking shows that air every Someday afternoon.
{Then we cut to a cooking show set with Reynold in front of a counter. The title ("Cooking with Reynold") is shown before disappearing. Jazz music plays until it stops after a short while.}
REYNOLD: Hello. Ni hao. Hola! Bonjour! Konichiwa. An-yeong-ha-se-yo. Welcome to my cooking show. I hope you enjoyed the spring rolls I made last week. Today, I'll be making my grandmother's strawberry pie. First...
{Suddenly, we cut to a black screen with the word "Technical Difficulties" flashing. Finally, we go to this message.}
We apologize for the interruption. There are technical
difficulties. Therefore, we'll show you an unreleased Fluffy
Puff Marshmallow commercial. Let us allow you that you aren't
missing anything at all.
{Then we go to a yellow background where Marshie flies to the screen wearing bunny ears.}
Marshie: 'Sup fools? I'm Marshie! And you'll get ready for the new Easter Egg Fluffy Puff Marshmallows, because they are coming!
{Then, egg-shaped marshmallows appear next to Marshie.}
Marshie: They look the same, but...
{Suddenly, Marshie begins hacking violently before coughing out an egg.}
Marshie: Sorry, I caught an egg in my throat! They taste the same, but look different! You can use these for fooling your mom and girlfriend! Watch this!
{Then we cut to a white background with Mr. Sticky and Female Sticky. Mr. Sticky is holding an egg-shaped marshmallow.}
Female Sticky: Mr. Sticky, eat your egg this instant!
Mr. Sticky: Okay.
{Mr. Sticky eats the marshmallow, and smiles in delight.}
Mr. Sticky: Mmm! Mmm! This marsh... I mean, egg is so good!
{Suddenly, 'Lil Sticky floats to the scene.}
'Lil Sticky: He's flying, I mean, lying.
{Then we cut to Marshie next to Topato.}
Marshie: They taste so freakin' good, potatoes love it! Just ask this talking potato right here!
Topato: I am not a talking potato. I am Topato, the potato superhero! And I will not want to answer your question, but after eating your marshmallow I thought was an egg, I liked it! Liked it! Liked it!
{Then we cut to Marshie in front of the yellow background.}
Marshie: So! Buy our new Easter Egg Fluffy Puff Marshmallows now in stores everywhere!
{Then the Fluffy Puff Marshmallow song begins playing.}
Marshie and Voices: I'm/They're fluffity. I'm/They're puff...
{Then we go back to another message.}
The technical difficulties are dealt with. Even though you missed the show, you didn't miss anything important. Seriously.
{Then we go back to Reynold's cooking show, where he is holding a strawberry pie.}
REYNOLD: And that's how you make my grandmother's strawberry pie. So until next time, so long, farewell. Good NIIIIIIIIIGGGGGGGGGGHHHHH...
{Suddenly, we cut to another black screen with the words "Technical Difficulties" flashing. Then we go back to Reynold in front of the Delta 1001.}
REYNOLD: So there's my cooking show. So, that was better than what Gunhaver's response would have been like. I wonder how Gunhaver is doing right now.
SHIM-SHAM-SAM: {off-screen} Um, Reynold? I'm afraid I've got some bad news.
{Then we zoom out to reveal Shim-Sham-Sam is next to Reynold and the Delta 1001.}
SHIM-SHAM-SAM: Apparently, the fans don't really like you replying to Gunhaver's emails, even though you're just temporarily replacing him. So I'm afraid that you're fired.
REYNOLD: WHAT??? Then who is going to answer Gunhaver's emails while he is in Retroville?
SHIM-SHAM-SAM: Why, none other than me, of course!
REYNOLD: Aw...
{Then we cut to the Delta 1001 screen. Then the Paper comes down, saying: Click here to email Shim-Sham-Sam (not Reynold) at: gunhaver@homestarrunner.com or at the Shim-Sham-Sam emails.}
Easter Eggs
- Click on Gunhaver's Chili-flavored steak with chili, chili sauce, jalapeño pepper, red pepper, green pepper, hot sauce, and other spicy condiments during the email to see the steak in a picture.
- Click on cooking show at the end to see this:
{We go to Reynold's cooking show, where he is walking to a cabinet high above him.}
REYNOLD: For today's show, I'm going to show you how to make my aunt's lasagna. First...
{As Reynold opens the cabinet door, bricks fall from the cabinet and onto Reynold's head.}
REYNOLD: And now, I'm unconscious.
{Then Reynold falls down, unconscious.}
- Click on Gunhaver (the second one) at the end to see this:
That Retro Show!
{Then we cut to Gunhaver in Retroville, suffering.}
GUNHAVER: Oh my, my situation here can't get any worse! I'm tired of root beer floats, for I hate root beer! Well, at least none of these losers are black and white.
{Then the black and white Gilligan and Skipper (from Gilligan's Island) walk to the scene. There is canned laughter heard. Gunhaver screams and faints.}
Fun Facts
- This email came out after double SS and thief 2 because no emails were sent to Gunhaver before these emails were released.
- Reynold typing in the wrong command is based on funny, where Strong Bad does the same thing.
- Reynold saying, "That never happened before!" was Strong Bad's response to him typing the wrong command.
- Reynold says Hello in Chinese, Spanish, French, Japanese, and Korean (in that order after the first Hello).
- Reynold mentioning spring rolls is based on Retro, where Reynold says spring rolls are the best thing he has ever eaten.
- Marshie choking on the egg is a reference to Malloween Commercial, where Marshie had a toenail in his throat.
- As well as Marshie saying the marshmallows taste the same, but look different (although at first, he was going to say they look the same, but taste different).
- Mr. Sticky, Female Sticky, and 'Lil Sticky (or The Sticky's) are my made-up characters to be used in the Shim-Sham-Sam Emails.
- Marshie's song at the end was the same one from Fluffy Puff Commercial and Meet Marshie.
- Shim-Sham-Sam does answer the next two emails.
- Reynold being unconscious due to the bricks is based on a cooking show skit in Nickelodeon's All That (I think it was the second season. If anyone knows about that skit, you can fix this fun fact a bit).
- That Retro Show is based on That 70s Show.
- Gilligan and Skipper are from the old 70s show: Gilligan's Island.
- Topato is the potato superhero from the comic WIGU, made by Jeff Rowland.
- Reynold's farewell is based on a song from The Sound of Music.
