Other Character Email Gunhaver/Magic
From Homestar Runner Fanstuff Wiki
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Summary
Gunhaver gets an email asking him if he can do any magic tricks. Gunhaver receives his magic kit and plays some magic tricks. Unfortunately, one of them will bring great despair to Gunhaver.
Cast (in order of appearance): Gunhaver, Arrowhaver, Fightgar, Silent Rip, The Sneak, Reynold, Ripberger, Firebert, Crackotage, Flashfight (Easter Egg)
Lines: 68
Transcript
{As usual, Gunhaver is in front of his computer, typing "run gunhaver_email" while saying something.}
Gunhaver: Dear Email, I kinda like you guys. Don’t run away from me. Please!
{The following email pops up as Gunhaver reads it.}
Hey Gunhaver!
Dude! Can you do any magic tricks? That would be so cool. Please! Please! Please!
Sincerely,
Your fan,
Eric
Gunhaver: (reading the email) Hey Gunhaver! Hey emailer. Dude! Whoa! Two openings! Anyway, can you do any magic tricks? That would be so cool. Please! Please! Please! All right already!!! Anyway, sincerely, your fan, Eric.
GUNHAVER: (clears page and starts typing) Well, your fan Eric, as you put in the salutation, you're really lucky. You emailed me about magic when I'm about to receive the new magic kit I ordered.
{Cut to a view of the whole computer room, with Arrowhaver holding a package.}
ARROWHAVER: Hey Gunhaver, I brought that magic kit you ordered.
GUNHAVER: Hey! I thought you were supposed to be a field agent, not a mail man!
ARROWHAVER: Um, well, this is my part-part-part-part-very part- time job.
GUNHAVER: Okay, good for you. {takes package} Now, leave, the Orange 02 is doing fine.
{Arrowhaver leaves.}
GUNHAVER: Imagine the things I could do with this magic kit!
{Gunhaver unwraps the paper covering the package to reveal a box. He opens the box to take out a wand.}
GUNHAVER: What??? This is it??? Man! That stinks!
{Gunhaver throws the wand at a wall, blowing the wall up.}
GUNHAVER: Whoa! That was so cool! I'm going to spend the rest of this email episode using magic!
{Cut to a room with Silent Rip and Fightgar. Gunhaver is nearby, reading a manual and holding the wand.}
FIGHTGAR: And then, that guy thought he had me. He told me all of his secrets and told me about Black Laser, who lives in the Underworld!
SILENT RIP: The Underworld? We should tell Gunhaver about Black Laser!
FIGHTGAR: Nah, he’s obsessed with Blue Laser. Well, I guess we should...
{Suddenly, Gunhaver uses his wand on Fightgar, turning him into The Sneak, waving its nose like mad.}
SILENT RIP: Fightgar? Fightgar?
GUNHAVER: (waves wand) Winguardium leviosa!
{Silent Rip is sent floating in the air.}
SILENT RIP: Please! Let me down! Okay! It's true! I stole all of Gunhaver's cookies!
GUNHAVER: You WHAT???
{There is a blinding white flash with an explosion sound. Cut to a room with Gunhaver’s portrait. Reynold is walking down the room.}
REYNOLD: I’m walking down the room, and I don't like that picture of Gunhaver.
{Suddenly, Gunhaver inside the portrait began to move and speak.}
Gunhaver portrait: I heard that! Now I'm going to kick your butt!
REYNOLD: (Glasses fly off as he runs, screaming like mad)
{Gunhaver arrives in the room and laughs while the portrait keeps on repeating what it said to Reynold over and over.}
{Cut to a dining room. Ripberger and Firebert were sitting on a table, eating lunch, which was a tray with some gravied yams and stuffinged ham and some mystery meat.}
RIPBERGER: (speaking Japanese) You think this lunch sucks? I can get better than this in um...
Firebert: (Cheat noises)
{Suddenly, Gunhaver arrives, waves his wand, and dashes off.}
RIPBERGER: (Cheat noises)
Firebert: (speaking Japanese} No way! I think Zena is better than Storm!
{Cut to the computer room. Gunhaver is typing.}
GUNHAVER: Man, that was fun! I can’t wait to do the last trick, which makes something really random happen. I hope it gives Flashfight a wedgie.
{Cut to show the view of the computer room. Gunhaver is waving his wand.}
GUNHAVER: One for the money, two for the show. Three for the bunny, and four for something really happen to happen like snow!
{Suddenly, an airplane flies around in the room and crashes into the computer desk, destroying the Orange 02 by breaking it in half. Then Crackotage exited the plane.}
Crackotage: Man, that was cool! I think I rule the school! He, he, hah, hah!
GUNHAVER: Crackotage, what the crap did you just do?
Crackotage: Well, I was free flying, and it looks like your computer is dying! He, he, hah, hah!
{The Orange 02 is in two halves, the bottom half still having the circuitry and the gear, and there is a pile of broken glass.}
GUNHAVER: NO! Crackotage, you have to fix the Orange 02, or else I'll decrease your salary! Not that I won't do that anyway.
Crackotage: Oh man! That stinks worse than that old van! He, he, hah, hah. Okay, I’ll get to work to have the computer fixed. I promise I won't have the computer parts mixed. (without enthusiasm) he... he... hah... hah...
{Cut to the ruined computer. The Paper comes down, saying: Click here to email Gunhaver at gunhaver@homestarrunner.com.}
Easter Eggs
- Click on the box when Gunhaver is about to get his wand to see a close-up picture of the Hollerin’ Jimmy Magic Kit.
- Click on the mystery meat in the dining room to see the secret ingredient: Dirt.
- Click on the circuitry in the ruined computer to move them around.
- Click on the gear to see Gunhaver use the wand to give Flashfight a kick in the butt without actually touching him.
Fun Facts
- "Part-part-part-part-very part-time job" was said in the Strong Bad email: part-time job.
- "Winguardium leviosa" is a reference to Harry Potter by J.K. Rowling.
- Gunhaver's portrait is from Shopping for Danger.
- Gravied yams and stuffinged ham are from Homestar Presents: Presents.
- Ripberger speaking Japanese is based on my fanfics in fanfiction.net.
- Zena is a real superhero in comic books. Storm is one of the mutants in X-Men.
- The incantation for Gunhaver's random spell is a parody of an incantation related to that, which includes pulling a bunny out of a hat.
- "I rule the school" is from the game Revenge of the King from the Homestar Runner website.
- Hollerin' Jimmy is also a hobby kit from the Strong Bad email: lackey.
- This is the beginning of the end for the Orange 02 (it has a few emails left).
- Black Laser's bio can be read here.
