Other Character Email 1-Up/ultimatium

From Homestar Runner Fanstuff Wiki

1-UP EMAIL 121!

1-Up is sent back to when Homestar and Strong Bad first met and finds out where this "alternate universe" came from where the Debug Force rules.

Cast (in order of appereance): Strong Bad, Homestar Runner, 1-Up, Prince of Town, Diapersmith, Dark Death, Alpha, Beta, Present-Day Delta, Present-Day Beta, Present-Day Omega, Present-Day Alpha, Present-Day Yuta, 30X2 Pan Pan, Marzichan, The Chibi, Stinkoman

"Get away from me! I don't even know you!"

Transcript

{Cut to the story-book version of Strong Bad sitting on his couch. The camera zooms out to view Homestar really close at the camera, in his ducky-shirt}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {in old story-book voice} Sorry, but we cannot do anything today. Strong Bad and his the Cheat egg are in the middle of a sleep.

STRONG BAD: {mumbling, in old story-book voice} Errgh... I found this egg first an- {wakes up} WAH!

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {looks at Strong Bad} Oh, hey. Are you okay, Strong Bad?

STRONG BAD: Get away from me! I don't even know you!

HOMESTAR RUNNER: You met me yesterday during the ten-step foot race cause' we fought over an egg.

STRONG BAD: {gets up off couch and looks at egg} Oh, yeah. I think we also nmet another time before. Remember in high school?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Oh, yeah. What happened after high school?

STRONG BAD: We went to college and then- Holy crap! We haven't seen each other for thirty years, crappy-face!

{1-Up appears out of nowhere in a bright white flash}

1-UP: Zip! Zoo! Zap! I am here everyone!

STRONG BAD: Woah! Who the heck are you?

1-UP: Me, 1-Up! Remember, Strongo Badio?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Hello, robot-dude.

1-UP: Homestar. What are you doing with a duck shirt?

STRONG BAD: We better take this crappy guy to the Prince of Town, man.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: You sure do say "crap" a lot.

STRONG BAD: That's just the way I am.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Tell me more about Free Country, USA.

STRONG BAD: Sure. But first you have to take this robot to the Prince of Town.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Why?

STRONG BAD: He could be the one.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: What one?

{The camera zooms in on Strong bad who gets up off the couch}

STRONG BAD: A long time ago, the Prince of Town made up this thing that a futuristic robot would appear in a flash and save us from Dark Death. I never thought any of that crap was true, at least until now.

1-UP: Just call me 1-Up.

STRONG BAD: No! I'll call you "my fist in your face"!

{Strong Bad punches 1-Up out and grabs a sack from behind the couch}

STRONG BAD: Homestar. Help me get him into the sack.

{Fade to black. Cut to a close-up of the Prince of Town sitting next to a pile of whatsit}

PRINCE OF TOWN: {sighs} I wish I had soomeone else to shovel this whatsit.

{Strong Bad and Homestar Runner walk in with the sack. Strong Bad drops the sack and 1-Up falls out and gets up}

1-UP: Yay! Free pudding!

{1-Up jumps into the whatsit. The camera zooms in on Strong Bad and Homestar. Strong Bad and Homestar look at each other and then looks back at 1-Up, Strong bad makes fake barfing sounds}

1-UP: This pudding tastes like a toilet!

PRINCE OF TOWN: Get out of there, you moronic robot!

1-UP: Don't talk to me like that! I am the chosen one!

PRINCE OF TOWN: {gasps} So it is true. My father's father's father's father was right when he made up those fairytales.

1-UP: What year is it?

STRONG BAD: It's the year 1996.

1-UP: Oh, that explains it. I normally time travel to 2005 or 2006. This means you haven't met me yet, nor have you even thought of creating me, Homestar.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: How do you know my name?

1-UP: In the future, you create me and then I accidently travelled back in time.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Wow. What are the odds that a futuristic robot would actually be from the future?

STRONG BAD: {short pause} Quite large, actually.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: I like those odds!

1-UP: Hey, wait. Do any of you guys have a computer with the internet so I can check my emails?

STRONG BAD: Computer? Internet? Emails?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Haven't you heard of it? The Cheat has one.

STRONG BAD: Who's the Cheat?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: It's what I decided to call your pink egg with yellow dots.

STRONG BAD: Oh, great. The moron decided to name my egg.

1-UP: {jumps out of whatsit} So, what do you guys want me for?

PRINCE OF TOWN: Do you know how to kill evil?

1-UP: Oh, sure. I've been doing it for 8 years.

STRONG BAD: 8 years, eh?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: If we put this robot against Dark Death, we will be able to take over his company.

STRONG BAD: I have a better plan.

{Strong Bad and Homestar Runner walk away from 1-Up for a quick second and the camera zooms in on them}

STRONG BAD: Are we sure that we can trust this guy? Look at him!

HOMESTAR RUNNER: No, we can't trust him. Maybe we should go face Dark Death ourselves.

STRONG BAD: That's an excellent idea.

{The camera zoooms out to reveal 1-Up talking to the Prince of Town}

1-UP: ...And that's how I almost died the sixteenth time.

PRINCE OF TOWN: That's good and all, but do you have any fruits or vegtables? I'm hungry.

1-UP: Fruits? Vegtables? {laughs}

{The Prince of Town gets angry and 1-Up stops laughing}

1-UP: Oh, you weren't kidding. {sighs} Why don't you try some pudding or some butter da?

{1-Up grabs a small sack from the whatsit saying "moldy bread" on it}

PRINCE OF TOWN: Okay I'll try it, but only if you promise I won't get addicted to this kind of food.

1-UP: Don't worry, you won't. In return, can I use your computer?

{The camera zooms in on the Prince of Town, who is know holding the sack saying "moldy bread"}

PRINCE OF TOWN: Doo-hoo-hoo! It's in the basement! Go, go!

{1-Up walks inside. Fade out and then fade in on 1-Up who is in a dark basement sitting on the floor next to a small desk with a small computer there}

1-UP: {singing} Email, check-check. Check-check, email!

{The following email appears on the Prince of Town's computer}

Clever Mr. Up...

Cleverly done, Mr. Up, but you're not supposed to be here.
As a matter of fact, you're not.
Go back to where you belong and finish your "sleep."

I want to give you an offer you won't regret.
DESTROY THE ULTIMATUM, the tall black building in the city that is crippling the city slowly.
I have a message from somewhere in time: You and your friends discover they've somehow escaped both the reactor explosion and my malevolent grasp. Before you can ponder their miraculous survival, the crippled Ultimatum lurches back to life just long enough to initiate a self-destruct sequence. With your friends at your side, you must flee a city in chaos before the Ultimatum's final detonation turns the country into a toxic, mutant-infested crater.
Until we meet again,
The Elusive Shadowy Figure

{1-Up doesn't even read the email. He stares at the screen for at least ten seconds in surprise}

1-UP: {typing} Umm. {snaps out of it} That email is too long. {reads the first part and stops at the end of the first line after "Clever, Mr. Up"} I know I'm not meant to be here. I find that obvious. In fact, a simple change could disrupt the entire universe. If I ate that egg that Strong Bad has, the Cheat probably wouldn't of ever been born. Speaking of that egg, maybe I could give it to the Chibi for dinner when I get back home.

{1-Up continues to read on and ends at the word "sleep"}

1-UP: Wait, wait, wait! What sleep? What do you mean I'm not here? What are you talking about?

{Fade to black. Cut to the outside of the castle. 1-Up walks out. The Prince of Town is gone, but Strong Bad and Homestar are}

STRONG BAD: Okay, so we've decided he won't help us.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Excellent.

{Homestar Runner and Strong Bad walk over to 1-Up}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: 1-Up! Go back inside and kill yourself in that trap we left in the hallway!

{Cut to the Prince of Town, now a little fatter then usual, walking through the hallway. He stops in front of a giant mouse trap with cheese on it standing in front of him}

PRINCE OF TOWN: Doo-hoo-hoo! CHEESE!

{The Prince of Town walks into the mouse trap and gets caught in it}

PRINCE OF TOWN: {getting caught} Woah! WAGH! {crying} Doo-hoo-hoo.

{Cut back to 1-Up, Strong bad and Homestar Runner talking. This time we can see the Diapersmith (Baby Poopsmith) in the background with a tiny toy shovel}

1-UP: Normally I don't get caught in traps, but if you want me to, then okay.

{1-Up runs into the castle. Strong Bad punches Homestar in the head}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Ow. What was that for?

STRONG BAD: Sorry. I was trying to give you a high-five, but I realised you had no hands. By that time, it was too late.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Come on. Let's go to Dark Death's black tower that is shining in the background.

STRONG BAD: What? {turns towards a black tower that is in the background} How come I've never noticed that before?

{Cut to Dark Death in his base, on a computer that has a picture of a map of Free Country, USA on it}

DARK DEATH: Excellent. My plan is half-complete. I will now make it snow at the beach! The one plan that Blue Laser failed!

{Beta and Alpha appear in a dark black spiral-shaped flash}

BETA: Good, we're here.

ALPHA: We can now continue our plan by going further back in time to when Homestar Runner's defences were weak.

DARK DEATH: Who are you guys?

BETA: We were henchmen sent by Master X in order to stop Homestar's forces in the future.

DARK DEATH: Forces?

ALPHA: In other words, 1-Up.

DARK DEATH: Hmm, with my evil plans and your knowledge of the future, we could destroy the Homestar Runner forever. {short pause} Hang on. I reconize you two.

BETA: You do?

DARK DEATH: Yes. You are the robots I'm working on. I see that I did a good job on you guys as well.

ALPHA: We are going to need proof.

DARK DEATH: Absoloutely.

{A dark portal appears and Dark Death walks in. Alpha and Beta follows him. Cut to a room that is completely dark. Alpha, Beta and Dark Death walk into the dark room that is nothing, but a table and five incomplete robots sitting in five chairs}

BETA: This place seems very familar.

ALPHA: Of course it's familar, stupid. It's an older version of our base. And the two robots at the back are incomplete versions of us. Hmm, I wonder what would happen if...

DARK DEATH: What, what? What is it? What do you want?

BETA: I have a plan, Alpha.

ALPHA: Aww, I'm getting sick of doing what you and Master X say.

BETA: That's the point! Listen, I have an idea! {whispers to Alpha} What if we get Dark Death to give us more advanced weaponry from 40X6 to upgrade our past selves, so that in the stupid future we will rule all, including Master X and the rest of the Debug Force.

ALPHA: Oh, I see. Excellent idea.

{Beta whispers something to Dark Death which the viewers can't hear}

DARK DEATH: WHAT?! What do you mean?! Is all this true!

BETA: I'm afraid so.

DARK DEATH: Well, I'll have to make sure all prototypes are destroyed.

ALPHA: Hey, won't that create a parralel universe?

BETA: Exactly.

ALPHA: But then our current universe will be erased.

BETA: That means Stinkoman will be gone and Master X can- Sorry. I mean, I can become the new "the guy" due to the fact that Stinkoman will be destroyed in the new timeline.

ALPHA: Great!

{They both laugh evilly. Fade to black. Cut to Strong Bad and Homestar Runner walking up to a building similar to Stinkoman HQ except that it is black}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {bashes head against door three times} Let me in! LET ME IN!

STRONG BAD: Why are we doing this?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Well, because Dark Death is attempting to kill-

STRONG BAD: No. I mean, why are we both doing this? You're dumb and I'm smart.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {gasps} Nobody calls me a bum!

{Strong Bad sighs and attempts to walk into the black tower, but it starts to ripple and force Strong bad away from it}

STRONG BAD: What the crap?!

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Fudge sundae?!

STRONG BAD: There is some kind of- WAGH!

{A robotic arm comes down from the top of the screen and grabs Strong Bad's head. The robotic arm puts a blue diamond thing on Strong Bad's head. This blue diamond thing causes Strong Bad's eyes to turn green and it makes his pants turn black. Strong Bad punches robot arm so it deactivates and goes back where it came from}

STRONG BAD: {in his Present-Day voice} Argh. What happened?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: You turned evil. Let's try going in again.

{Homestar Runner and Strong Bad attempt to walk in. Homestar Runner is flung out of the way like Strong bad was before, but strangely, Strong Bad can make it through}

STRONG BAD: Woah! This blue diamond must be giving me powers! This is amazing!

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Well, you are the only one who can go in. Goodbye, Strong Bad. I must go.

{Homestar leaves as Strong Bad fully walks into the black tower. Fade to black. Cut to 1-Up standing in the field. Homestar Runner walks onscreen and starts talking to 1-Up}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Hey, future robo-butt! I have a new head-thing for you!

1-UP: What? An idea?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Yeah, that's it.

1-UP: Okay. So can I go destroy the ultimatum?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: What's the ultra-mopman?

1-UP: It's a large black tower which is slowly destroying the city.

{The camera zooms in on Homestar Runner's head as the sky in the background very slowly turns red}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Oh. So that black tower that Strong Bad entered- Oh no! Waffles!

1-UP: Yes. Pudding waffles! Anyway, do you know what could happen?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Yes. Dark Death is about to take over the universe successfully.

1-UP: My universe will be erased from the timeline? Oh no! Marzichan, Stinkoman, the Chibilichi! I must help them by stopping thi-

{30X2 Pan Pan appears with Marzichan, the Chibilichi and Stinkoman in a bright white flash}

1-UP: Pan Pan?

30X2 PAN PAN: Yes! I came back and saved these guys! No thanks to you!

1-UP: Sorry about that, but what about the bright side? At least I found the source.

30X2 PAN PAN: Strong Bad and Homestar Runner are about to succeed in stopping Dark Death! Master X and his goons are not the cause' of the alternate universe.

1-UP: No? Then what is the cause of the apocalyptic world?

30X2 PAN PAN: You are!

1-UP: What?!

{A holigraphic paper comes down. Fade to black}

Fun Facts

Explanations

If you do not understand what is going on. Here is an explanation. 1-Up was in an alternate universe, right? It turns out that the Debug Force goes further back in time and made Dark Death succeed in his mission, thus succeeding in his mission.
Master X is the 20X6 form of Dark Death, that is why he is included in the plot.

Trivia

If you do not understand this, please see the previous emails.
The egg in the couch scene at the beggining of the email is taken from flashback.
- Coincidently, the Prince of Town from the 100th Strong Bad email was also used. In older emails, he was renamed the Prince of City due to being to son of the King of Town.
It is possible that the email that was sent could reference the Matrix film.
Blue Laser and "making it snow at the beach" are both Cheat Commando references.
This explains how Homestar Runner and Strong Bad got their current look.

Other Character Email 1-Up/ultimatium

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