Other Character Email Jaro/distance

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Contents

Summery

Jaro goes back in time again, and the bad guys are…well, BAD!!

Cast: Green Beard, Dark Greggo and Muffin Man, Poopsmith, Jaro, Grundy, Chorch, Strong Sad

Lines: 111

Transcript

{Fade to Green Beard’s ship. He is at his computer, typing something, when Dark Greggo enters.}

DARK GREGGO: Are you done yet? We need this plan up and running ASAP.

GREEN BEARD: I’m searching as fast as I can, DG. We need the perfect email to start our plan.

DARK GREGGO: Geeze, how many SBEmails are there?

GREEN BEARD: 780. Thank goodness for Wikipedia.

DARK GREGGO: Well, hurry up. The sooner you find a good email, the sooner we can go. And, why don’t you just write a new email?

GREEN BEARD: They might be suspicious. So, I need an email that was sent from someone else, and looks like a harmless sbemail clone.

DARK GREGGO: Good, good…

GREEN BEARD: Aha! Take a gander at this one!

{Dark Greggo goes behind Green Beard’s desk and looks at the email.}

DARK GREGGO: Perfect…Send it to them.

GREEN BEARD: Are you sure this will work?

DARK GREGGO: Have I ever been wrong?

{Muffin Man leans onscreen.}

MUFFIN MAN: Woo-Hoo!

DARK GREGGO: …more than once?

GREEN BEARD: Well, what about the smelly one?

DARK GREGGO: Don’t worry. I told you…I thought of everything…

{Fade to the Z-Ship. The Poopsmith is sitting on a bed, holding an iPod.}

POOPSMITH: Only 7000 songs on my iPod.

{Cut to the Poopsmith watching Tv.}

POOPSMTIH: Only 2000 channels…

{Cut to the Poopsmith on a computer.}

POOPSMITH: Only a limitless number of websites…

{Cut to Poopsmith standing next to Jaro.}

POOPSMITH: I’m bored. Let’s go to the beach!

JARO: I hate the beach.

POOPSMITH: You hate everything!

JARO: Well, everything you like.

GRUNDY: {offscreen} Mail! Poopsmith, you got a letter!

POOPSMITH: {grabs letter, and reads it in his head} I’m going to Hawaii!

CHORCH: You!? What’s so special about you?!

POOPSMITH: Nothing! Now if you excuse me, I’ve got a trip to Hawaii! {steps outside}

JARO: Did he forget we’re on a boat?

GRUNDY: I saw a plane outside.

CHORCH: How does a guy like that get a trip to a tropical island?

JARO: Maybe it’s because he’s a main H Star R character.

GRUNDY: Maybe it was a mis-print.

{Cut to a piece of paper. The trio’s names are on it, and Grundy voices over, and whatever he says happens.}

GRUNDY: If you take the R in Jaro, it accidentally becomes a P. Then the O in Chorch is doubled, the R in Chorch mimics the R in Jaro, and my last name, “smith” is added.

{Cut back to the Z-Boat.}

JARO: I don’t know. You’d got to be really stupid to do that! And your last name isn’t Smith! It’s--

CHORCH: We can discuss the motives of the people who did this anytime, we’ve got email to check!

{The desk and Lappit fall in front of the trio.}

GRUNDY: I wish it wouldn’t keep doing that.

alt. uni.

Dear Strong Jaro,
Got some ?'s for you:
1. What would you do with a hundred million dollars?
2. What would you do if you suddenly found yourself in
an alternate universe somehow?
Jody (not a girl), TX

JARO: I’m not sure, Jo-Dee! Maybe I’d go to a tropical island like a certain…whatever he is did!

CHORCH: It’s better not to hold grudges.

JARO: Whatever. As for question two, I don’t think we can go to an alternate universe.

LAPPIT: That feature is practicly impossible.

JARO: Well, can we do anything like that?

LAPPIT: I do have a time-traveler.

JARO: But, we already time-traveled!

CHORCH: Maybe we can go back in time to 2006 and see what’s changed since we left.

JARO: Well, okay. Lappit, you heard the man!

{In a lens flare, the trio is gone. Pan out to see the two evildoers watching the email on your computer.}

GREEN BEARD: So, you made them go back in time? What good will that do us?!

DARK GREGGO: Patience. It will all come together in the end.

{Fade to 2006. The trio and The Lappit end up in the field.}

GRUNDY: We’re back!

JARO: It’s been a while.

CHORCH: Technically, it’s only been three days since we left.

JARO: Oh. Well, at least we no that nothings chang---

GRUNDY: Holy crap! What’s that!

{Pan over to show a small funnel-like hole in the space time continuum. It is slowly getting bigger. Strong Sad walks up.}

STRONG SAD: Help has arrived!

JARO: What’s going on!?

STRONG SAD: I’m not sure. It all started when the Poopsmith vanished out of thin air the other day. Then, this thing appeared and started sucking everything in!

JARO: Poopsmith? That was us! We caused this!

{Strong Sad is suddenly thrust backwards.}

STRONG SAD: Well, this never ends well…

{He is sucked into the hole, causing it to grow much larger.}

CHORCH: Strong Sad! NO!

GRUNDY: Run!!

{The trio head for the hills, leaving the Lappit behind. It is sucked into the hole and fires a beam of energy at the trio.}

JARO: What’s going on?!

CHORCH: The time-space effects are overloading the Lappit! It’s teleporting us to—

{And, the trio disappear. Cut to the bad guys.}

GREEN BEARD: That was your plan!? To have them teleported to a random location?!

DARK GREGGO: Must I remind you of my infinite knowledge? I know exactly where they are going. But, that is only the beginning of the plan. Tell me, Green Beard, where do you think the stuff that gets sucked into that portal goes?

GREEN BEARD: I thought it was destroyed, and then is wiped from existence, arr.

DARK GREGGO: Yes. But The Lappit is a very high-tech piece of equitment. It’s time-travel effects can in fact over-power the time-hole, and even in a way, reprogram it. Because of this, it can temporarily change the way the hole works, and cause the computer itself to be transported through time. And I’ve calculated where it will end up.

GREEN BEARD: I think I know where…

{In a burst of light, the Lappit appears on the desk in front of them.}

GREEN BEARD: So, what do you intend to do with it?

DARK GREGGO: Let me explain…

{Cut to the Lappit’s screen, which reads “Click here to email Jaro.” After ten seconds…}

DARK GREGGO: What’s that doing here?!

Easter Eggs

  • Added soon!

Fun Facts

  • Added soon!
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