Other Character Email Jaro/sticklyman

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CAST:Jaro, Chorch, Grundy, Poopsmith, Harvax XVII, Master

SUMMARY:The minions meet Master

LINES:101

TRANSCRIPT

JARO: Checking email all over the world.

Dear Jaro, Grundy, and Chorch,

Do you know sticklyman? Is he cool?
He seems really cool. If you havent met him
you should because he's worth it!

From:
Homestarmy, Rhode Island

JARO: Ack! What are you trying to do? Get us killed? {Backspaces "Sticklyman" and types "The Master".} Whew. Problem solved.

GRUNDY: You should know it's against the law for lowly minions to see the masters name.

CHORCH: And to look at him.

GRUNDY: None of us have ever seen his mighty form.

JARO: Well, actually...

CHORCH: What?

JARO: Remember the last boss inspection thing?

GRUNDY: Oh yeah. So?

JARO: Well..{Fade to Tampo's Lunar Wharehouse. All minions are there.}

JARO: {Voiceover} When they sent out that light thing to blind the minions..I sorta looked away. I saw the master.

GRUNDY: {Voiceover} Was he awesome like the rumors told us?

JARO: {Voiceover} Actually, he was anything but.

{Cut back to the X-5.}

JARO: Look. {Pulls out a note pad and a pencil. He draws a stick figure with a visor.} This is what he looks like.

CHORCH: Wow.

GRUNDY: He looks so... unimpressive.

{The Poopsmith walks up.}

POOPSMITH: Hey guys, what's- Who's the sticky guy?

JARO: He is our all knowing, all powerful master Sticklyman.

POOPSMITH: That's your master? {Tries not to laugh. A vein appears on his forehead. He cannot resist the strain and bursts out laughing.} Ha ha ha! Master! HHHHHHAAAA! I could knock him down with one hit from my shovel!

JARO: Shovel?

POOPSMITH: Yeah.

JARO: Sticklyman has a shovel.

POOPSMITH: Lots of people have shovels, Jaro.

JARO: He shoveled goop before he was injured by Stinkoman.

POOPSMITH: I shovel goop. I was injured by Strong Bad.

JARO: He used to not talk.

POOPSMITH: What are you saying?

JARO: I-Is Sticklyman your 20X6 form?

POOPSMITH: I don't know. You should ask him.

JARO: Ask The Master? Are you crazy! He'd rip us to shreds!!!

POOPSMITH: Or would he....?

CHORCH: Yeah, he would.

POOPSMITH: Well, what if you were disguised as someone he likes?

JARO: Hmmmm......mmm...mmmmm.

POOPSMITH: Well?

JARO: Wait! HmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmMMMMmmmmmMMMMMmmmmmmmmmm {Chorch and Grundy start looking annoyed.} mmmmmmmmmmMMMMMMMMMMMMmmmmmm...okay.

{Cut to the Master's mansion. It is a giant castle surrounded by a moat. The trio and the Poopsmith walk up to it. Chorch is in a terrible Tampo costume, Grundy has a Brody mask on and has no shoes, and Jaro has a cardboard cut-out of Stlunko around him. Tey walk up and a small moniter comes out of the ground.}

HARVAX XVII: {On monitor.} Halt! Who goes there? Prepare to be destroyed!!

JARO: {Badly imitating Stlunko.} Wait! It is Tampo, Brody and Stlunko. We would like to have a word with the Master.

HARVAX XVII: {Calling to someone offscreen.} Boss! It's the weak guys!

MASTER: {Offscreen.} Well? WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR!!!??? LET THEM IN!

HARVAX XVII: Y-Yes, my Master.

{The ground under the trio moves, and goes outward across the moat so they can get across. They slowly walk inside. They are now standing before the Master.}

MASTER: Ah, Tampo..it's been a while. Have you come early just to screw up again?

CHORCH: {Perfectly imitating Tampo.} Well, handsome, powerful Master. We came here to-

MASTER: That's not important! I have listed your failures on a list. {Pulls out a rolled up paper. When un rolled it is very long.} First thing is, you almost caused the end of the world, and- {Notices Poopsmith.} Who's that?

GRUNDY: {Badly imitating Brody.} Well sir, he is why we came here.

CHORCH: {Perfectly imitating Tampo.} You see, we have reason to belive that he is your 2005 counter-part.

MASTER: {Silence.} HOW DARE YOU RELATE ME TO A FOUL-SMELLING CRETIN!! I SHOULD LOCK YOU IN A DUNGEON AND STARVE YOU!!!

CHORCH: {Perfectly imitating Tampo.} Well, could you at least check if you're related?

MASTER: I suppose... but if he isn't... you will be punished in ways you can't imagine!!

{They walk down a long hallway into a room with two chairs hooked up to a small machine.}

MASTER: Sit down, smelly one.

{The Poopsmith sits in a chair and Master sits in the other. He pulls a switch.}

MASTER: This will tell me if we are related.

{Beeping is heard and after five seconds, it stops.}

MACHINE: DNA match: Confirmed.

MASTER: Wow! I guess we are related!!

POOPSMITH: Hooray!

MASTER: Congrats Tampo! For finding my past form, you get 50 meritpoints! But, by wasting my time earlier, you lose 40 points, leaving you with 10.

JARO: {Badly imitating Stlunko} Well, we will be on our way.

{They turn around to leave, but Jaros costume falls off, and Chorch drops his too.}

MASTER: Lowly minions? IN MY CASTLE!?!?!?!?!

{Fire appears behind Master and he grows huge.}

MASTER: I'm going to destroy you!!!!!!!!!!!!!

POOPSMITH: No! You can't destroy them!

MASTER: And why not!!??

POOPSMITH: If you do, I'll destroy myself, causing you to never be born!

MASTER: Hmm. That would cause a paradox..hmm. Think, think, think. Oh, bother. Tell you what. I'll let you go, for 5 dollars.

JARO: Here you go. {Hands the Master a 5 dollar bill}

MASTER: Now get out!

{The trio leave. Cut to the X-5, with the words:}

Click here to email Jaro.

EASTER EGGS

  • Click on "Jaro" to see his picture again.


FUN FACTS

  • There are many refrances to Tampo emails.
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