Other Character Email Tampo/relatives

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Tampo Email #9: "relatives"

Summary: We get to learn about the creation of Tampo, Brody and Stlunko.

Cast (in order of appearance): Tampo, Brody, Stlunko, Stinkoman

Places: Computer Room, 20X6 Junkyard, Holo-Room (Easter Egg)

Length: 78 Lines

Date: April 21, 2005

Transcript

{It's the Plasma 2000. Everything's normal.}

TAMPO: I email to the left! I email to the right! I email-email-email all day and night!

{Stlunko opens an email and Tampo reads it.}

Dear Tampo,
Do you have any relatives who are still alive? If so, can
you show us to them? And if you don't have any relatives,
then how the heck were you and Stlunko made? (I know Brody
was born from an egg from probably a mutant chicken).

Sincerely,
Shim-Sham-Sam's descendant (probably at least grandson),
Sayo-Sham-Sam

{Tampo says "Long Name" instead of the last two lines.}

{Stlunko opens a word document. Everything spoken is typed by Stlunko.}

TAMPO: Actually, um... well, I'll let Stlunko and Brody tell you about their relatives first.

BRODY: Okay...

STLUNKO: I was created by the master to recruit minions in this sector. I found Brody and Tampo early in my mission, and we stayed together.

BRODY: And Tampo sort of emerged as the leader.

TAMPO: Yeah. Because of my personality.

STLUNKO: So my "relative" would be the master, who is still alive.

BRODY: Yeah. And you were right pretty much about how I was born, Sam. I did come from a egg layed by a mutant chicken. But not just a mutant chicken. I'm the son of King Clucks! Yes, the great ruler of the giant chicken clan!

TAMPO: Um, I don't think anyone from the city has heard of him.

{Cut to a cave wall with primitive drawings sketched on. The first one is of a bunch of giant chickens, all similar to Brody.}

BRODY: {narrating} Really? Well, in a jungle far away lived a tribe of giant chickens.

{The drawing changes to one of a bunch of stick people pointing at a giant chicken.}

BRODY: {narrating} But then, about 10 years ago, a bunch of hungry humans found their tribe.

{Drawing changes to a bunch of giant chickens in a huge fire.}

BRODY: {narrating} Wanting some food, they burned the whole jungle down!

{Drawing of a bunch of stick figure people carrying away crudely-drawn roasted giant chickens.}

BRODY: {narrating, voice breaking} Everyone was turned into roast chicken. Even my father, the k... {sobs} king... I never got to meet him.

{Cut back to the Plasma.}

TAMPO: Maybe we should take it from here.

BRODY: {sobbing} Okay. {walks away}

STLUNKO: Then the humans found Brody's charred egg in the ruins. The eggs from this mutant chicken are made from biola-

TAMPO: -really tough stuff.

STLUNKO: ...yes. "Really tough stuff." So they brought the egg back and sold it to Stinkoman. Stinkoman brought it back to his kitchen and left it in the far corner. He forgot about it and Brody hatched.

TAMPO: And then Stlunko found him after Stinkoman had beaten him up. So that's his story.

{Brody walks back.}

BRODY: Sorry about that, guys.

STLUNKO: It is fine.

TAMPO: No biggie, I understand. Anyways, to answer your question Sam, I have no idea who my relatives are, if I even have any. You know, with the memory loss, and the...

BRODY: What? We all know your creator is...

TAMPO: Shhhh!! It's embarrassing.

STLUNKO: I do not understand your embarrassment.

TAMPO: Well, I mean, why did I have to be made by HIM?! Even he... okay, okay. I'll tell them the story.

{Cut to a junkyard with futuristic trash.}

TAMPO: {offscreen} I have no memory of this, Stlunko actually had to search the InstaNet for this info. Anyways... my creator was... {pauses} Stinkoman.

{Stinkoman walks from the side and sits down in the middle of the screen.}

TAMPO: {offscreen} Yeah, um...

BRODY: {offscreen} As far as we can tell, Stinkoman was really bored. Wanting a challenge, he somehow built Tampo. No idea how.

STINKOMAN: I'm so bored. {yawns} Is there anyone out there wanting a challenge?

{Suddenly a hovering 20X6 dumptruck comes from the side of the screen and drops its cargo: a broken robot body. The metallic body crumples onto the ground as the truck drives away.}

STINKOMAN: Huh? {looks at crumbled robot body} That's not a challenge! {sighs}

{A jar breaks loose from a rubbish pile and falls down. A brain is visible inside. It hits the ground next to Stinkoman and shatters. The brain lays on the ground.}

STINKOMAN: What is this? Some sort of pudding?

{Stinkoman pokes the brain with his fist. His fist sinks inside.}

STINKOMAN: Wah! This pudding is eating me!

{Stinkoman flails about, the brain stuck to his arm. Suddenly it flies off and lands on the empty dome head of the robot, breaking through. Suddenly the robot activates, heals itself super quick, and gets up.}

STINKOMAN: {stares at brainbot} Are you inquiring about a challenge? You are tall, but that won't stop me from {jumps and punches at brainbot, shouting} Puncha-puncha-puncha!

{Cut back to the Plasma.}

TAMPO: Yeah, no idea. So um... until next time... I need a break.

{Tampo floats away}

BRODY: {calling} Where are you going?

STLUNKO: I am still waiting for the money.

BRODY: You know, for a personality-less robot, you sure care about money a lot. It'll come... {voice trails off} it'll come... eventually...

{Stlunko opens the "Click here to email Tampo." pop-up.}

Easter Eggs

Click on the maximize icon on the Email Tampo pop-up to see where Tampo went.

{Tampo is in the Holo-Room, wearing a large virtual reality headset. The back wall of the Holo-Room is a screen showing what Tampo is seeing. Tampo apparently is playing the first boss fight of the game Stinkoman 20X6: the one where Stinkoman battles Tampo.}

TAMPO: This game is fun if you play it right.

{Onscreen, Stinkoman walks into one of Tampo's laserballs and dies. Then the game over screen covers the wall.}

STINKOMAN: {onscreen, subtitled} My stummy hurts.

{Cuts back to Brody and Stlunko at the Plasma 2000.}

Fun Facts

There are three references to the game Stinkoman 20X6 to be found here.
- Brody's egg was left forgotten in Stinkoman's kitchen. In the game, Stinkoman met Brody there.
- Stinkoman's quote after the brainbot came to life in taken from the movie of Stinkoman 20X6's first level.
- The video game part of the easter egg is taken directly from the game.

Quick Links

This email features a hidden DVD Commentary by Joshua and TotalSpaceshipGuy3.

Other Character Email Tampo/relatives

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