Other Character Email Strong Sad/Roxy Deux

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Contents

Summary

Zzzzz....huh? Oh yeah, this. Strong Sad confronts Roxy Dawson.

Cast(in order of appearance): Strong Sad, Announcer, Henchmen, Hysterical Woman, Roxy Dawson

Transcript

{Strong Sad walks out of a room into an elegant, contemporary styled hallway.}

ANNOUNCER: Last time on Strong Sad Email...

{Strong Sad looks around, trying to find the source of the sound}

ANNOUNCER: Strong Sad managed to escape from his endless odyssey, only to find the culprit behind his torments: Roxy Dawson, an embittered consultant hired to spice up Strong Sad Email. Can Strong Sad survive La Maison de Roxy and defeat the cruel professional, or will he perish? Find out!

{Henchmen (wearing a black turtleneck, black jeans, and white sneakers) walks up to Strong Sad}

HENCHMEN: Are you one of the new recruits?

STRONG SAD: Um, yes.

HENCHMEN: Ms. Dawson prefers her employees to wear the uniform, instead of walking around naked. I’ll go get you a uniform.

{Cut to later. Strong Sad is dressed in a henchmen’s uniform}

HENCHMEN: Oh, and remember, Sherri’s birthday party is at 4.

STRONG SAD: Dang, I forgot to get a gift.

HENCHMEN: Ooo, that’s bad. She’ll get you for that.{leaves}

STRONG SAD: Time to go buy Sherri a gift! I mean, defeat Roxy.

{Cut to Strong Sad climbing a spiral staircase, with an employees’ handbook.}

STRONG SAD: {out of breath} Why couldn’t she put her penthouse in the basement?

{He walks onto the top landing and into her empty office, decorated in a tastiful jade green, with a huge window overlooking a generic city at night.}

STRONG SAD: It figures. I go all this way and she’s not here.

HYSTERICAL WOMAN: {off-screen} Hey! In here!

STRONG SAD: Huh?

{He follows the voice to a room off of the office. Inside the room in Hysterical Woman, in a prison cell.}

STRONG SAD: You’ve been here all this time? But I thought you wrote these...

HYSTERICAL WOMAN: Would you just the post-modern implications of this and let me out?

STRONG SAD: Just a minute...

ROXY DAWSON: Hey!

{Strong Sad turn to Roxy Dawson, who is standing in the doorway}

ROXY DAWSON: {holding up a mug} I asked for a sugar substitute, not sugar!

STRONG SAD: It’s me, Strong Sad.

ROXY DAWSON: And I want skim milk, not whole! How am I supposed to keep my lithe, androgynous figure with this stuff?

STRONG SAD: I’m your nemesis!

HYSTERICAL WOMAN: Nows your chance! Kill her!

STRONG SAD: {dramatic} I could never...kill...anyone... (except in certain fanfics).

HYSTERICAL WOMAN: Well, then hurt her or something! Just stop her!

STRONG SAD: Ummm...

ROXY DAWSON: Wait, you’re that angriest elephant kid I’ve been tormenting. Guards!

{Fade out and fade back in, with Strong Sad in the cell with Hysterical Woman. Roxy Dawson looks at them with contempt}

ROXY DAWSON: You thought you were my nemesis, Strong Sad? You thought wrong. I have a bigger nemesis...the biggest nemesis of them all...God! God didn’t like my advice either, so I’m going to destroy God and recreate the World in my own image! There is nothing you can do to stop me! Hahahahahaha!

HYSTERICAL WOMAN: {to Strong Sad} Nice going. Why did you come all this way to mess up? You’re just as stupid as that guy from the short “Stink Bomb”.

ROXY DAWSON: {in pain} No! Don’t say that!

STRONG SAD: What, you don’t like Katsuhiro Otomo?

HYSTERICAL WOMAN: {to Strong Sad} I think she hates obscure anime references.

STRONG SAD: Like “Tenshitachi no Shinkaron”?

ROXY DAWSON: Arghhh!!!!

HYSTERICAL WOMAN: (Insert obscure anime reference)

STRONG SAD: (Insert another obscure anime reference)

ROXY DAWSON: DO NOT WANT!

{Roxy Dawson explodes in a budget-destroying explosion.}

HYSTERICAL WOMAN: Well, that was a great ending. Got any money for a Greyhound?

ANNOUNCERS: So, our brave heroes went home after a job well done. Hysterical Woman went back to Maryland, and Strong Sad went back to Free Country USA.

{Cut to Strong Sad at the computer}

STRONG SAD: Time for another email. {opens his email}

Dear Strong Sad,
Without making any obscure references (I listened
to Roxy Dawson), why not go on an action-packed
adventure that'll evolve into a storyline? After all,
your email show could be more popular, and more
people will like you! And they can diss Strong Bad!
I don't like Strong Bad these days. He's getting
BORING!
From,
Shim-Sham-Sam

STRONG SAD: {just stares for a long time} .......

{A scream is heard over the Strong Household.}

{The end}

Easter Egg

  • Wait for this scene:
{Strong Bad standing by Strong Sad's door.}
STRONG BAD: Fatty again isn't going to do his performance art junket 'cause he threw his computer out the window for some reason. Don't ask me why. I'm not his therapist or nothing.
  • Click on the concept of computers for this scene.
{Cut to Bubs' Concession Stand. On the counter is Strong Sad's busted computer. A female skunk walks up to the stand.}
SKUNK: Hey, is that an Amiga?

Fun Facts

Explanation

  • This is the finale of a storyline that started with the email danger.
  • This episode was two years in the making! Doesn't it show?
  • This is the end of the season, and the road.
  • Yes, Strong Sad is naked.

H*R References

  • The fate of Strong Sad's computer is similar to that of Strong Bad's computer.

Inside References

  • Roxy Dawson was a consultant hired by Hysterical Woman in email roxy dawson to improve Strong Sad Emails. She and Strong Sad however refused her advice.
  • Strong Sad has met before Hysterical Woman, namely in naked? and roxy dawson.
  • The (insert anime reference) is just way of getting around a writer's block.

Real World References

  • The henchmen dress like stagehands.
  • "Certain fanfics" refers to the story "A Visit with Strong Sad", writing by me.
  • Katsuhiro Otomo is a Japanese anime director, famous for the movie "Akira". He also produced a collection of short animations called "Memories", which included a piece called "Stink Bomb".
  • I don't really remember where I got "Tenshitachi no Shinkaron" from. Google says it's about a sexless robot. Good for them.
  • "Do not want" is a 4chan meme. It came from a Chinese bootleg, where Darth Vader's "Nooooo!" was translated as "Do not want!"
  • Greyhound is a bus company.
  • The skunk is Sabrina of Sabrina Online fame. She and her creator are Amiga fans, for some unknown reason.

Related Links

Other Character Email
Strong Sad Email


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