Other Character Email Strong Sad/Biography

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What, like you didn't write a novel in kindergarden?

Contents

Summary

Strong Sad talks about writing and alienates the audience.

Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Sad, Strong Bad

Transcript

STRONG SAD: Good bye, Blue Monday.

{Strong Sad opens up his email}

Strong Sad,
Have you ever written a book?
You know, like, a biography?
Color Printer

STRONG SAD: {typing} Color printer? I used to have one of those, but then Strong Bad took it and used it for his fake college game. Poor printy. At least it bet the spread. Anyway, about my writing...

{Goes over to old file cabinet with the word "Boring stuff" writing in calligraphy on it. Opens drawer and takes out a pad of lined paper with crayons}

STRONG SAD: This was my first novel, written when I was in 2nd grade. It's unfinished because the teacher took it away because it was suposed to be "Sit In The Dark Quietly" Hour. It was about an elephant named Humperton who must save his country from nuclear war.

{Pulls out a school notebook with a picture of a 90's Christina Ricchi on it}

STRONG SAD: In middle school I wrote about vampires. Mostly they killed my classmates horribly.

{pulls out a professional typed document}

STRONG SAD: Now I work as a freelance writer. I mostly write stories about people turning into cockroaches. My stuff gets picked up by an...um, adult publisher, so I use a pen name. I've never had the courage to see what they do with them. I once got a fan letter from Coach Z. Couldn't look him in the face for a week after that.

{Pulls out a notebook with a picture of Squee on it}

STRONG SAD: You asked about a biography, right? I'm working on my autobiography right now. I'll read it to you. {starts reading} "Call me a fertilized zygote. My cells have divided in two. These cells divide in two. The cells that have divided divide again. The cells that have..."

{Strong Bad pops in}

STRONG BAD: This is why I answer the emails around here. {leaves}

{The End}

Easter Eggs

  • If you wait, you get this short.
{Computer makes a sound}
STRONG SAD:{reading}"...It is warm but dark..."{stops reading} Oh, I got another email.
{Strong Sad brings up the email} 
hello,
your the best writter evar.
you should be president.
STRONG SAD: Why must people torment me? Deleted.
  • Click on the file cabinet for this:
{animated crayon drawing of an elephant in a wheelchair}
ELEPHANT: Peanuts vill be grown and smushed!

Fun Facts

Explanations

  • Strong Sad's line in the beginning, his writing career, and the email at the end are references to the Kurt Vonnegut Jr. novel "Breakfast of Champions".
  • Strong Sad's early writing career is semi-autobiographical. I tried writing novels when I was young. When I was in sixth grade I started writing one about my adventures in a land I found in my closet where anthropormorphic mice wage war. In high school I started writing a story about a young clean-cut guy who gets entangled with a beautiful vampire he meets in a vampire bar. I quit writing around my senior year but now I'm back, writing too much.
  • The elephant Easter Egg is a reference to the movie "Dr. Strangelove".

Related Links


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