The Homestar Runner Movie/Scene Four

From Homestar Runner Fanstuff Wiki

Summary

Homestar and all of his gang must adapt to their new surroundings, New York City.

CHARACTERS: (In Order Of Appearance) Homestar Runner, Strong Bad, Street Vendor, Coach Z, Angry Woman, Pom Pom, Strong Sad, Strong Mad, The Cheat, Little Girl, Bubs, Marzipan, Hippie One, Hippie Two, Homsar, News Caster One, News Caster Two, Resteraunt Owner, The King Of Town, The Poopsmith, Police Man One, Police Man Two

PLACES: New York City

Transcript

{Homestar and Strong Bad are walking down a New York City sidewalk. Many people rush past as they talk}

HOMESTAR: Strong Bad, where are we?

STRONG BAD: For the last time. I DON'T KNOW!

HOMESTAR: Oh. Well why didn't you just say that in the first place... meany.

STRONG BAD: {at the same time} Gah! What I'm more worried about is finding the others. I hope we're not the only ones here.

HOMESTAR: Oh. I doubt that. You see-

{Cut to show a street vendor selling hot dogs from a cart. Homestar and Strong Bad walk up}

VENDOR: HOT DOGS! Get'cha hot dogs here! Finest in all of New York! {to Homestar} Hey, whitey. You want a dog?

HOMESTAR: No thanks. I once got bit by a dog.

STRONG BAD: New York? Where the crap is that?

VENDOR: What? Oh. You're mexican aren't you? {mumbling} Must be one of those crazy luchadors of somethin'.

HOMESTAR: Is New York anywhere close to Free Counry, USA?

VENDOR: Never heard of it, whitey.

STRONG BAD: Well you're no hel-

{Coach Z runs by. Followed by an angry woman}

WOMAN: I'll teach you to make comments like that!

COACH Z: Wort? I was just sayin' you had a nice-

{The woman begins to beat Coach Z with her briefcase. She continues in the backround until later stated}

STRONG BAD: What the crap?

VENDOR: Sheesh! What's with all the brightly colored freaks today?

{Pom Pom and Strong Sad walk in}

VENDOR: {weirded out} That's it. I'm outta here. {Pushes his cart off} Hot Dogs! Get your hot dogs here! The best in New York City! {dissapears offscreen}

POM POM: {bubbles}

HOMESTAR: Well, how'd you guys get here?

STRONG SAD: It was so weird. Everything got really bright, and next thing I know we're standing in some park!

STRONG BAD: Dumbstar here destroyed the site's server!

POM POM: {surprised} {bubbles}

HOMESTAR: No. I'm sure there's some way to fix all this!

STRONG BAD: Where's Strong Mad and The Cheat?

STRONG SAD: Oh. There over across the street.

{Cut to show Strong Mad and The Cheat walking on a different sidewalk. A little girl walks up to The Cheat}

LITTLE GIRL: Aww. {bends down and pets The Cheat} He's so cute! What animal is he?

THE CHEAT: {cheat noises.}

LITTLE GIRL: {giggling} He sounds like he's talking.

STRONG MAD: HE WAS TALKING! HE'S THE CHEAT!

LITTLE GIRL: {scared} Ahh! {runs off}

{cut back to Homestar, Strong Bad, Strong Sad, Pom Pom, Coach Z, and the angry woman}

WOMAN: {standing up} There. That should teach you to mess with me! {walks off}

COACH Z: {standing up, weakly} Oh gorsh! I don't feel sore good.

BUBS: {voice offscreen} No no no. Those aren't the best in the world. I make the best in the world back at my stand!

VENDOR: {offscreen} {Angrilly} You wanna prove it?

HOMESTAR: Bubs! {They all run towards him}

{Cut to show Bubs arguing with the street vendor. Homestar, Strong Bad, Coach Z, Pom Pom and Strong Sad run in}

BUBS: Yah! I'll fight you right here, right now!

STRONG BAD: Whoa there, Bubs! Take it easy. We're in his area now!

STRONG SAD: Look. Some sort of a peace rally's going on down the street.

{Cut to show several hippies standing outside a building protesting. There signs read, STOP WAR!, BRING OUR TROUPS HOME!, NO MORE SOLDIERS SHOULD DIE!. Marzipan can be seen in the crowd}

MARZIPAN: Wow! A whole group of people just like me! Hey are you guys vegitarians too?

HIPPIE ONE: You better believe it!

MARZIPAN: What exactly are you guys protesting?

HIPPIE TWO: War. It needs to end now! Too many deaths!

MARZIPAN: {shyly} Well, I once protested against Chinchillas...

HIPPIE ONE: And for good reason, too! I hate Chinchillas!

{Cut back to the others. Strong Mad and The Cheat have now joined up with the rest}

STRONG BAD: {to Strong Sad} Sadman, go get Marzipan outta there before I beat your brains in! {Strong Sad runs off}

COACH Z: {now stable} Hormsar! Lork up at the screen!

{Cut to the big Times Square television thing. Homsar is on it, upside down.}

HOMSAR: {from tv screen} AaAaAaAaAaAaAaAaAaAa!

{Cut to inside actual news studio. Homsar is floating upside down in front of the camera. The two newscasters are sitting back at their desks.}

HOMSAR: {into camera} I'm a salad sturrer in a blender. Pishoooooo. I once met a man from calamazoo. And he set to me, "Hey captain? You want some graaaaavaaaay?" AaAaAaAaAaAaAaAaAaAaAaAa!

NEWS CASTERS ONE AND TWO: {at the same time. The phrases are randomly said} What? Get this guy off the set! How'd he get in here anyway? Who let him in? He just appeared! Security! Anybody? C'mon people! Work with me! Get this guy out!

{cut back to the rest. Strong Sad has returned with Marzipan, who now holds one of the protest signs}

MARZIPAN: Everything's become so crazy!

HOMESTAR: We need to get everyone back together!

{A restaraunt owner bursts open a door down the side walk and shoves The King Of Town and The Poopmsmith out}

RESTARAUNT OWNER: AND STAY OUT! {slams the doors}

KING OF TOWN: {to Poopsmith} Mmm. That was one of the best buffets I've ever eaten at! {seeing the others} Oh! Hey guys! This is a nice play, huh?

HOMESTAR: No! It's scary!

THE CHEAT: {cheat noises}

STRONG BAD: You said it The Cheat.

{Vendor walks in with two police officers}

VENDOR: There they are, officers. The freaks!

POLICE MAN ONE: We'll take it from here.

POLICE MAN TWO: We know just how to handle freaks! {grabs The Cheat}

HOMESTAR: Uh oh.

{end of scene}

The Homestar Runner Movie
Opening Titles Old Scenes Scene One|Scene Two|Scene Three|Scene Four