Other Character Email Gunhaver/Who Shot Mr. Haver? (In Depth)
From Homestar Runner Fanstuff Wiki
Summary
No, we are not going to see who shot Gunhaver, yet. But we do get to see an in-depth of the whole shooting Gunhaver situation.
Cast (in order of appearance): Gunhaver, The Shooter (he's/she's another person, but this is a mystery), Flashfight, Reynold, Arrowhaver, Fightgar, Crackotage, Silent Rip, Firebert, Ripberger, Foxface, Reinforcements, Wedginator, Gyro, BlastFit, Police Cheat
Transcript
{We cut to a dark room with a Cheat in the shadows.}
?: Heh, heh, heh. At last, I will have my revenge. Gunhaver's death will only be the beginning. {does an evil laugh, but then he coughs}
{We go to Gunhaver in front of the Delta 1001 from the email Unused emails.}
GUNHAVER: {angrily and typing} All right! All right! I was lying the whole time! I don't have any methods for my unused emails because I HAVE no unused emails! Do you realize that any email in my inbox is used? That's because people don't email me crazily as that guy or Strong Bad! Although the whole Firebert animation thing was true, but, you know, I wish I could have unused emails. Yep, I would have made an email fort with that. Yep, I can imagine it now. It'll exist someday, someday.
{Music begins to play. While we see a thought bubble come from Gunhaver's head, we don't get to see Gunhaver's imagination. Instead, we see the mysterious figure in a dark corridor, creeping along slowly.}
GUNHAVER: {singing off-screen} Email fort is where I'm going to be the king of...
{Then we cut to a room with couches. It is empty.}
GUNHAVER: {singing off-screen} ...I just ordered a nice set of king glove...
{Then we go to the dining room, which is empty.}
GUNHAVER: {singing off-screen} ...who is made of email as well, and if you don't like it...
{We see the vehicle room, which is empty with Cheats, but full of vehicles.}
GUNHAVER: {singing off-screen} ...go to email heck...
{Then we cut to the rooms with bunks. It's, once again, empty.}
GUNHAVER: {singing off-screen} ...there's an email butler with an email suit, and my email dog on its email mat...
{Then we cut back to the shadowy figure. Then he holds up a firearm.}
GUNHAVER: {singing off-screen} ...I will shake you down with my email bat...
{Then we see the shadowy figure in the foreground with Gunhaver in front of the Delta 1001 (side view) in front of him.}
GUNHAVER: {singing off-screen} ...and all your second...
{Then we see a close-up view of the firearm. Then in slow motion, the tranquilizing dart is shot out of the firearm. Then (Matrix style), the dart flies towards Gunhaver.}
GUNHAVER: {singing off-screen in slow-motion} ...rate fort say your...
{Then the dart hits Gunhaver's head, popping his thought bubble and knocking him off the chair and onto the ground. Then we see Gunhaver sleeping on the floor with the tranquilizing dart in his head. Then the Paper comes down, saying Click here to email Gunhaver at: gunhaver@homestarrunner.com..}
{Then Flashfight, Reynold, Arrowhaver, Fightgar, Crackotage, Silent Rip, Firebert, Ripberger, Foxface, Reinforcements, Wedginator, Gyro, and BlastFit run into the room and they look shocked at Gunhaver with the dart in his head.}
REYNOLD: Oh my Cornbread! What happened?
FLASHFIGHT: That's what I was going to say.
ARROWHAVER: Gunhaver's been murdered!!!
{Then we see Gyro examining Gunhaver.}
GYRO: No, he's breathing. He's still alive. Plus, this is only a tranquilizing dart.
REYNOLD: {off-screen} Oh.
{Gyro pulls out the dart.}
GYRO: A very strong tranquilizing dart. Gunhaver will be asleep for about a week.
FOXFACE: What??? Will he starve?
ARROWHAVER: Perhaps.
RIPBERGER: {Japanese}
Firebert: {Cheatese}
{Then Fightgar, Silent Rip, and Crackotage run into the room.}
SILENT RIP: We've checked the security cameras, and we saw no one come into the HQ this day.
Crackotage: Which means that the murderer is one of us, and I saw that that's bigger than a bus! He, he, hah, hah!
FIGHTGAR: But I didn't do it!
WEDGINATOR: DaAaAaAaAaAa! You've got Cinderelly's shoe breads!
BLASTFIT: But that thing shoots actual bullets, not tranquilizing darts.
REINFORCEMENTS: Chort Commandos, we've gort ourselves a morstery here.
FOXFACE: I don't think we'll ever know who did this. Every Cheat Commando is a suspect.
FLASHFIGHT: Well, I can't posseeblee solve the meesteree. {points at the camera} Can you?
{Then the camera pulls back to see he's pointing at a Police Cheat.}
POLICE CHEAT: Yeah, I'll give it a shot. I mean, you know, it's my job, right?
{Then we cut to a black background with these white words. Trumpets begin to play the Taps in the background.}
In memoriam to Gunhaver
19?? to 2005
We're going to miss you bro
GUNHAVER: {off-screen} I'm not dead!
{Then the first sign is crossed out and another message is written under it.}
In memoriam to Gunhaver
19?? to 2005
We're going to miss you bro
He will be revived in a week.
Fun Facts
- This Not Quite Gunhaver email continued from the last part of Unused emails, starting from Gunhaver's
pizzaemail fort song. - This email has references to the last part of Who Shot Mr. Burns? (Part 1):
- The HQ was almost empty. In the last part of the episode, Marge was like "Where is everybody?" when Mr. Burns is shot.
- The last part of the episode.
- What Foxface says in the end is similar to what Marge said in the end.
- What Flashfight says is similar to what Dr. Hibbert said. Plus, they both did the pointing to the camera, only to point to the nearest police officer (Police Cheat and Wiggum).
- Wiggum said what the Police Cheat said after being pointed to by Hibbert/Flashfight.
- The dart flying slow motion is referencing to the Matrix movies where the bullets fly in slow-motion.
- BlastFit is made in the Fake Characters section.
- Gyro is a fake character who made his first Gunhaver email appearance in Switch.
- The final message (which is crossed out) is referencing to the message in trevor the vampire, where there was a memoriam message for Trevor.
- This episode shows clues to who the "murderer" is.
