Homestar History Montage
From Homestar Runner Fanstuff Wiki
Relieve 13 years' worth of pivotal Homestar Runner moments.
Cast: (in order of appearance) Homestar Runner, Pom Pom, Strong Bad, Cheerleader, So and So, What's Her Face, The Ugly One, Visor Robot, Trogdor, Strong Mad, The Cheat, Wagon Fulla Pancakes, Marzipan, Strong Sad, Coach Z, Bubs, The King of Town, The Poopsmith, Homsar, Drive-Thru Whale, The Umpire
DVD Exclusive: Everything Else Greatest Hits (Easter Egg)
Transcript
{Tandy 400 boots up and plays the following scenes. The lower left-hand corner displays an h*r logo with the appropriate year written on it.}
1996: Original Book
{Homestar is standing in front of a star.}
NARRATOR: Everybody loves the Homestar Runner. He is a terrific athlete.
{Cut to Homestar and Pom Pom are standing in a field.}
NARRATOR: One day, his friend, Pom-Pom, asked him to enter the Strongest Man in the World Contest.
1996: Super NES
SINGERS: Hooomestaaaar! Run! Run! Hooomestaaaar! Run! Run!
{Visuals: Cut to the wrestling arena. "アホチスーカヲ" is printed on the center of the wrestling ring. Homestar and Strong Bad appear to be chasing each other, running left and right. Afterward, a yellow burst saying, "RUN", emerges from a cloud, in front of a green background. Then, Cut to a television inside a yellow room. The television shows Homestar hitting two baseballs. Next, another burst}
1999: Where My Hat is At?
NARRATOR: It wasn't in the postbox. Or under the auto.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Where my hat is at?
2000: Old Intro
{Homestar appears inside the star, which changes from white to blue, and spins around as several fireworks explode against the black background. Homestar's eye sparkles again. After one last firework surrounds the star and disappears, an h*r logo appears underneath the star, with either the word "enter" written under it.}
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Hello!
2001: some kinda robot
STRONG BAD: -what kind of powers do you have? Do you use them for good, or for awesome? Would you like to join forces?
{Border changes to Compy 386}
2002: comic
CHEERLEADER: Okay, now let's start LOOKING GOOD!!!
SO AND SO: A'ight.
THE UGLY ONE: A'ight.
WHAT'S HER FACE: A'ight.
{The Visor Robot zaps So and So's head with a laser.}
NARRATOR STRONG BAD: VOIP!
{So and So's upper body becomes a black pile of ashes and a skull.}
CHEERLEADER: Kristen, you look burnt, or DEAD.
2003: dragon
STRONG BAD: Trogdor was a man!
I mean, he was a dragon-man!
Er, maybe he was just a dragon.
Um... But he was still TROGDOR!!!!
{Border changes to Lappy 486}
2004: montage
{Cut to a silhouette of Strong Bad and the Wagon Fulla Pancakes running past a sunset and an ocean.}
STRONG BAD: {singing}
It's a showdown going downtown
You're gonna mess around showdown
{Cut to the wagon ascending the bleachers again.}
Put your nose down showdown
{Cut to quick shot of wagon jumping up and down at the top of the bleachers.}
2005: Strong Bad is a Bad Guy
SINGERS: Strong Bad is a bad guy, bad guy, bad guy. Strong Bad is a bad guy, bad guy, bad guy.
{Visuals: Strong Bad, in Strong Badia, beats a muffler with a pipe. Strong Bad spins above Cold One bottles and a bowl of peanuts. Strong Bad dances in front of a gray background with the words "BAD GUY".}
2006: Weclome Back
{Cut to everyone standing in regular clothes in front of a plain blue background. The words "everybody, everybody" appear in front of them, zooming and flashing. The music from the Intro page plays.}
CHILDREN: Everybody, everybody! Everybody, everybody! Everybody, everybody! Everybody, everybody!
2007: Drive-Thru
STRONG BAD: {Cut back to view outside Drive-Thru Whale} Could you repeat that? {Shakes head} I thought you just asked me to sever my leg. {Strong Bad shakes his leg as he says this}
DRIVE-THRU WHALE: Sever your leg, please. It's the greatest day.
STRONG BAD: {Incredulous} "Sever my leg"? "It's the greatest day"? I'm not sure I understand the transaction that's taking place here.
2008: SBCG4AP Advertisement
STRONG BAD: Witness my amazing videogame styles, in all three of the glorious Ds! {at the base of the stairs, he turns left, to see The Cheat standing on a washing machine to the right of a dryer, below the No Loafing sign} Hi, The Cheat.
THE CHEAT: Meh.
STRONG BAD: Depth, {turns into the basement, facing the Trogdor arcade game, then pans left to the couch} dimension, and—
{The music scratches to a stop as Homestar Runner appears from below.}
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Hey, Strong Bad. I've got a low polygon count. {smiles}
STRONG BAD: —dumb idiots.
{Border changes to Compé.}
2009: Where My Hat is At? (toon)
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Man, Mr. Umpire, you sure have a funny way of pronouncing—
{push wipe down; Homestar in a green star on a blue field. Homestar pulls out The Local Newspapes.}
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Homestar Runner's team wins!
THE UMPIRE: {off-screen} Yeah, you're suspended from the league. {Homestar looks disappointed}
Fun Facts
- This montage bears some similarities to ones featured in Sesame Street anniversary specials, such as this, which play clips against an evolving television border and display years on a street sign in the lower left-hand corner.
- The clips for "Original Book" and the original "Where My Hat is At?" were taken from Everything Else Volume 2.
- In the Old Intro clip, Homestar says "Hello!" right when the h*r logo appears, but in the actual intro, he did not do this until the viewer rolled over the logo.
- The "montage" clip features a Lappy 486 border despite coming from the Compy 386 era.
