The Neverending Email/Archive 4
From Homestar Runner Fanstuff Wiki
This page contains all Neverending email entries from 2 October, 2005 through 23 October, 2005
DO NOT PUT NEW ENTRIES ON THIS PAGE! Post it on the main Neverending Email page instead.
Transcript
HOMESTAR: Um, Stong Buh, a moment for a question??
STRONG BAD: No.
HOMESTAR: {ignoring SB} Well, Strong Bood, do you even know what A Fan looks like??? He might be... {lengthly pause} a fan!!!
STRONG BAD: What???
HOMESTAR: As I said he could just be a fan that bloows cold air to cool down people down when they get hot!!
STRONG BAD: Soooo, what are you getting at???
HOMESTAR: {sighs, and sounds annoyed} Nevermind. {walks away}
STRONG BAD: Hey wait!!! The Cheat, let's go find A Fan.
{The Cheese comes instead of The Cheat}
THE CHEESE: {evilly} I'm back!!! {laughs}
STRONG BAD: {wakes up} AAHHHHHHH!!!
{The Paper comes down, reading "Look, I've got to come down some time!!!"}
STRONG BAD: Hey! The email isn't finished!!!
{The Paper goes back up, then comes down reading "Fine. See you in... never!"}
STRONG BAD:I need the help of ev'rybody to kill A Fan!!!
{cut to The Locker Room}
COACH Z: Sore. {glaring evilly} Whort's in art fer mar???
STRONG BAD: Um, Potatoe Chips??
COACH Z: Shore!!!
{cut to Bubs' Connces5ion Stand}
BUBS: {annoyed} Can I help you?
STRONG BAD: Help me kill A Fan.
BUBS: Stan??? I fired him.
STRONG BAD: No, I said A Fan!!! A FREAKIN FAN!!!
BUBS: Hey, hey, hey. No need to yell, calm down. Alright, alright. I'll help.
{cut to The Strong Household}
STRONG MAD: I'LL JOIN!!! I'LL JOIN!!!
{cut to The Basement}
THE CHEESEAT: Meh!!! {Yes!!!}
{cut to the KOT's castle}
KING OF TOWN: No, unless there's food.
STRONG BAD: How'd I get here anyways???
{cut to the pile of whatsit}
STRONG BAD: {walking past The Poopsmith} Just walking along, just walking along, {trails off} just walking along...
{cut to Homestar's house}
HOMESTAR: I'm already on your team, cwapface!!!
STRONG BAD: Well, I'm not going to ask Marzipan.
{cut to Marzipan's house}
MARZIPAN: If Strong Bad doesn't come to ask me, I'm burning his present.
{cut to the 20X6 field}
STINKOMAN: I wonder if I should use this tim-
{The time machine gets squished by The Bendini Sisters}
STINKOMAN: Oh, well.
{cut to The Field}
SUBTITLE: Warning! You have too many partners! You must only have two.
STRONG BAD: Fine... I choose, No-armed wighty and Dump-butt.
{All characters but Strong Bad, Homestar and Strong Sad disappear.}
STRONG SAD: Strong Bad, that's the nicest thing you've ever done for me...except for the one time you took me on an all ice cream picnic for my birthday.
STRONG BAD: {nervously} I thought we aggreed not to mention that in public.
HOMESTAR: Hey, Strongbad, um...you might want to see this.
{A mysterious poison dart hits Strong Bad in the back of the head.}
{Minutes Later Strong Bad comes back to life as a zombie.}
HOMESTAR: Oh crap! Lets get out of here!
{Homestar and Strong Sad run away.}
BATMAN NARRATOR VOICE: Will Strong Bad be cured of the zombie virus? Will Homestar and Strong Sad be able to find A fan? Stay tuned to find out!
A COMMERCIAL
{Hoesta can be seen in White Fadey Land.}
HOESTA: We all know what happens when you throw a Eggplant onto a brick wall.
{An eggplant slams into a brick wall}
HOESTA: But, what happens when you throw it onto trees?
{An eggplant slams into a tree. The tree falls down}
HOESTA: Y'see. You kids can enjoy throwing Eggplants onto bricks, but nothing else. Eggplants are painful to the environmen- wait, what? Was I watching to much Ren & Stimpy? Aw well.
{Hoesta walks away.}
ZOMBIFIED STRONG BAD: {wakes up} Man, what have I been eating???
VISOR ROBOT: Fish eyes.
ZOMBIFIED STRONG BAD: Where'd you come from?
VISOR ROBOT: Why would you want to know? No one cares about me. I feel nothing. I'm just... a robot.
{sad music plays, the Visor Robot starts to sing}
I'm just a roooooooobot,
No-body caaaaaressssss.
Why...would you care?
I'm jusssssssst: a robot.
ZOMBIFIED STRONG BAD: {clears nose, starts to cry, voice starts to crack} That's so beautiful. {cries}
NARRATOR: And when one of Strong Bad's tears touched himself, he started a transformation into some kinda r-
FREAKISHLY HORRIFING VOICE: EMERGENCY PLOT CHANGE!!!
{cut to Strong Bad's basement}
STRONG BAD: This PSP is awesome!!! But I still need to kill A Fan. Better check an email.
Dear S to the B,
Why is your email so darn long?
Why don't you ask the 'Big Guys'
to put this in parts?
B the to S
STRONG BAD: No this is already in parts. Watch. The "To Be Continued" screen is coming in 5...
VISOR ROBOT: 4...
HOESTA: 3...
SHADOWY FIGURE: {subtitled} 2...
STRONG MAD: On-
TO BE CONTINUED...
{The Paper comes down}
{'3 weeks later' appears on the screen for 5 seconds}
NARRATOR: And now we return to reality.
{Zombie Strong Bad bumbles along. But then falls off a cliff.}
ZOMBIE STRONG BAD: {Screams}
{Strong Bad splatters on the bottem of the cliff. Homestar and Strong Sad come.}
HOMESTAR: Well, I guess we should get a Phoenix down and revive him.
{A mushroom comes into Strong Bad's mouth. Strong Bad comes back to life}
STRONG BAD: I'M ALIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
VOICE: Hello Strong Bad. This is God...
STRONG BAD: {gasps}
{cut to a hospital}
DR. JONES: ...frey Jones, from the hospital.
