Other Character Email The Poopsmith/new job
From Homestar Runner Fanstuff Wiki
Contents |
Summary
Poopsmith Email #27
By: Poopsmith Z
The Poopsmith quits his job to join "The Dark Side Of The Force".
Cast (in order of appearance): The Poopsmith, The King of Town, The King's Chef, The Blacksmith, Marzipan, Darth Sidious, Homsar, Giant Homsar Poop Monster
Transcript
THE POOPSMITH: Email? Is that you? Wow, I haven't seen you in ages! How are ya?
Hey Sooperdooperpooperscooper,
Did you go to college?
You should go and get a better job!
-TheCheese
THE POOPSMITH: {typing} Okay, then. I will.
{He gets up. Cut to the King of Town's pantry, where the King of Town is eating from a box of chocolates. The Poopsmith comes in.}
THE KING OF TOWN: Oh, hello, Poopsmith. We've run out of truffles, and this box was full this morning. Have you been scoffing them behind my back?
THE POOPSMITH: (Big, fat moron of Town, I QUIT!)
{He throws his shovel at the King and takes off his gloves. We see that his hands are glove shaped. he then walks back outside and sits down at the computer.}
Poopsmith,
Come and join the dark side of the force!
-Darth Sidious
THE POOPSMITH: {typing slightly faster than usual, thanks to the absence of gloves} The Dark Side of the Force? Isn't that the local inn down the road? Hey, maybe I could get a job there! Thanks, Dork Sillius!
{The Poopsmith runs away, carrying the Boxor 186 and the Crapasonic 900 with him into the distance. The King of Town, the King's Chef and the Blacksmith come out of the front door in the foreground.}
THE KING OF TOWN: Fine! Leave! I don't need you anyway! The Chef can do your job!
THE KING'S CHEF: Nu-uh.
THE KING OF TOWN: The Blacksmith will do it!
THE BLACKSMITH: Not a chance.
THE KING OF TOWN: Well...I'll find someone!
{Cut to the Poopsmith, running through a field happily while happy music plays in the background. He arrives at a dark looking inn and goes inside. Marzipan is behind the counter.}
THE POOPSMITH: (Marzipan? I didn't know you worked here!)
MARZIPAN: Yes, I own this place! It used to be owned by my uncle, Eustice Pietimer Jr, and he died last week, and he left this place to me! I've only just opened it, and I need somebody to work as a barman on Somedays.
THE POOPSMITH: (Well, I'm looking for a job. Can I work here?)
MARZIPAN: Sure!
THE POOPSMITH: (Great! Um, by the way, I got an email from Death Slimious or something. Who's he?
MARZIPAN: Darth Sidious? He works in the kitchen. I got him to send invitations.
{Cut to the kitchen, where a crazy looking man is slicing bread with a lightsaber while cackling madly.}
Three Weeks Later...
{Cut to a very distressed looking King of Town standing with his chef and blacksmith outside of the castle next to an enormous pile of poop.}
THE KING OF TOWN: Oh, I need my old Poopsmith back. This new one isn't doing his job very well.
{Homsar, wearing the Poopsmith's gloves and carrying his shovel, jumps from the top of the castle and lands in the pile. He sinks into it completely, until only his hat is visible. Suddenly it grows big, there's a rumbling sound, and the pile turns into a giant moving statue of Homsar. It swallows The King of Town, The Chef and The Blacksmith, then walks along with a slowed down version of Homsar's walking sound. It spits out the Poopsmith's shovel and gloves.}
GIANT HOMSAR POOP MONSTER: {voice sounds like a cross between Strong Mad and Homsar's voices} THOSE PIZZA PARTIES ENLOYED MY STOMACH WALLPAPER!
{Cut to The Dark Side Of The Force, where the Poopsmith is wiping a glass with a cloth. He hears screaming sounds outside, then runs out to see the Giant Homsar Poop Monster. The camera zooms into his eye and he squints. He grabs his shovel and puts his gloves on. The next scene is done in the form of 8-Bit sprites, parodying Stinkoman 20X6.}
THE POOPSMITH: {subtitled} COME GET SOME!
{The Poopsmith jumps up into the sky and digs out a chunk of the top of the Giant Homsar Poop Monster's head on the way up, then lands on top of him.}
GIANT HOMSAR POOP MONSTER: DAaAaAaAaAaAaAaAaA!
{The Poopsmith flings the poop into the monster's mouth and grabs Homsar's hat. He then jumps off the monster, grabs it by its right foot, spins it around and tosses it into the air. It explodes. The animation goes back to normal and the King of Town, Homsar, The Chef and The Blacksmith all fall to the ground. The Poopsmith runs over to the KOT.}
THE POOPSMITH: (I'm never quitting ever again! I love my job!)
THE KING OF TOWN: Good! Now let's all go home.
{The Pom Pilot pops up in the corner of the screen}
Click here to email The Poopsmith
Back
Easter Eggs
No, there's no easter eggs. You got a super-long email, what more do you want?
Fun Facts
- This would make a great last ever episode. But I'm gonna make more, don't worry.
- This is the first time we see the Poopsmith without his gloves on.
- This is the third job-themed email.
