Other Character Email Tampo/apocalypse/Commentary

From Homestar Runner Fanstuff Wiki

• The DVD version features a hidden commentary for Tampo Email #25: "apocalypse." To access it, switch your DVD player's audio language selection while watching.

Commentary Transcript

(Commentary by: Joshua, TotalSpaceshipGuy3)

JOSHUA: Hello, viewers. Me and TSG3 here... and we'll be doing the commentary for this email.

TOTALSPACESHIPGUY3: Yo. I heart this email.

JOSHUA: Yeah, it's a unique one. When I released this, I wasn't sure it would work. You know, because it was so different from the rest of the emails on the site.

TOTALSPACESHIPGUY3: Yeah, I don't think anyone was ready to have the world blow up. I sure wasn't.

JOSHUA: {laughs} I didn't stop with the world. I went on to explode all Homestar Runner-related universes.

TOTALSPACESHIPGUY3: {snickers} And Fanstuffs and Knowlegde Bases and Forums.

JOSHUA: Yeppers. {pause} And here's a little blast from Tampo's past with Cherry Greg and the Gregginator.

TOTALSPACESHIPGUY3: I {pause} don't, uh, think I saw that one, oh! 'The Boss Trio Reloaded'! They're jerks.

JOSHUA: I don't think the Trickster has any idea of what he almost just did. Anyway, you should check out email, um, #2... because it's pretty similar to this one in way of plot. Except Cherry Greg's death doesn't do anything.

TOTALSPACESHIPGUY3: I much prefer emails that kill someone and destroy something in the process. Strong Bad was a bad choice to kill, though.

JOSHUA: I'll be revisiting the Gregginator and his roots sometime. And I might explain why Cherry Greg's death didn't effect anything. I have two emails from the Gregginator in Tampo's inbox. From two different users.

TOTALSPACESHIPGUY3: Yeah, remember a couple'a emails ago, Homsar kicked the crap out of Tampo, Brody, and Stlunko? Which one was that?

JOSHUA: That was way back in #5: "conquest." No one really died, although some like Marzipan and Pom Pom should have. But obviously no death makes the time stream stay intact.

TOTALSPACESHIPGUY3: True. Oh! So Stinkoman wasn't made, 1-Up and Pan-Pan died, Sticklyman stayed a humble worker, Tampo, Brody and Stlunko were not made, hence the not killing of Strong Bad. {pants due to loss of breath}

JOSHUA: It'd be like going back in time and killing George Washington before the revolutionary war. But of course, Tampo and Brody wouldn't think like that. All they are thinking of is "must answer email." At least they have Stlunko by their side.

TOTALSPACESHIPGUY3: Whoops! Josh, how dare you break the forth wall? Was it asking of a challenge?

JOSHUA: Heh, there goes Homsar, being flung away. The boss trio finally got their revenge. ...and this whole email is a fourth wall break, pretty much.

TOTALSPACESHIPGUY3: Yeah.

JOSHUA: Um... no one can see your facial espressions. This is a sound-only thing...

TOTALSPACESHIPGUY3: Mabye so, but... Um... No one can hear you shut up either. I'll be back in about three hours.

{Footsteps leave; a door opens and closes, then shortly opens again}

TOTALSPACESHIPGUY3: Uhh... I locked my keys in my car. Let's just move on.

JOSHUA: Anyway, here Stlunko states that its like Terminator 2. Pretty good movie.

TOTALSPACESHIPGUY3: {adopting an Arnold Schwarzenegger accent} Yeah. Terminator 2 was a great movie.

JOSHUA: Now here, they're just being mean to Strong Bad. I didn't really like making them do that; Strong Bad's a great guy. Well, it had to be done in the name of science. Or, more accurately, because some guy emailed them and told them to.

TOTALSPACESHIPGUY3: Well, by the looks of it, they didn't like it eihter.

JOSHUA: Yeah, no decent person... or brain, chicken and robot would like to kill an innocent guy, even if he was going to do something bad in the future. At least, I know I wouldn't. Like to kill anybody. At all. Ever. And now we fade to the narrative... who isn't played by me, by the way.

TOTALSPACESHIPGUY3: Killing Strong Bad "killed" Stinkoman, 1-Up, Pan Pan, Tampo, Brody and Stlunko. Ouch. Since Tampo, Brody and Stlunko went made Strong Bad stayed alive {yelling} Oh no, I've entered a time warp!!!!!

JOSHUA: Um... you lost me there... what?

TOTALSPACESHIPGUY3: You know. Stinkoman wasn't made. NEB-1 killed 1-Up and Pan Pan, Sticklyman stayed a humble worker, Tampo didn't reunite with the body, Stinkoman didn't buy Brody, so some guy ate him, Stlunko wasn't created. Without Tampo, Brody and Stlunko to kill Strong Bad, Stinkoman was made, and protected 1-Up and Pan Pan, Tampo reuntied with his body, Stinkoman bought and forgot about Brody, Sticklyman made Stlunko. Tampo, Brody and Stlunko killed Strong-

JOSHUA: Enough! Jeez, I get it. It was the "Since the boss trio went made Strong Bad stayed alive" thing that confused me. Yes... I know how this paradox works. I tried figuring it out, and that's what made me believe that backwards time travel can't, and never will, exist. Except in fiction. Simply because of this paradox.

TOTALSPACESHIPGUY3: {clearly zoned out} Huh? Oh, wha? Oh! {normal} Sorry, working on my email show. So, yeah. The paradox is confusing.

JOSHUA: {simutaniously with narrator} "This is the end of Tampo, Brody, Stlunko and indeed, 20X6 altogether. Good-bye." {snickers} Some people actually believed that at first. ...and here are the fake fun facts and easter eggs.

TOTALSPACESHIPGUY3: This is where the email breaks the forth wall.

JOSHUA: Majorly breaks the fourth wall. I tend to imagine my whole Tampo Email thing as an animated series, as with this DVD and stuff, but this... goes over the edge. The fun facts and easter egg descriptions aren't supposed to be part of the cartoon. So this one breaks the fourth wall by having the email itself behave like the wiki transcript... which then requires us, as DVD commentators, to break the fourth wall by talking about it.

TOTALSPACESHIPGUY3: Yeah.

JOSHUA: And now, suprise surprise, it was a virtual simulation all along. You now, it really shouldn't have destroyed the main Homestar universe or all the other fanstuff universes. You'd think the damage would be localized to the J05H-ooa universe alone.

TOTALSPACESHIPGUY3: {laughing} J05H-ooa universe, eh?

JOSHUA: {laughs} Yep. Revealed that in "experiment" when the boss trio got teleported to the IMI-tation one. And the Gunhaver Email universe is named S-S-S4M, and there's the self-explanatory H-star-R universe. And... those are the only four I named. Dennis Dunjinman named her own universe, but I forget the name. And the reason these weren't mentioned in this email is because I didn't go into the whole multiversal thing until a few emails later.

TOTALSPACESHIPGUY3: I see. {simutaniously with Tampo} "Kick his butt." {laughs} I uh, like that line.

JOSHUA: Oh, heh. Well, I guess this email makes Stlunko a universal hero. Anyway, that's the end of a truly classic email. And the end of the first Tampo Email commentary. Thank you for your time.

TOTALSPACESHIPGUY3: No problem at all.