Other Character Email Gunhaver/FAQ
From Homestar Runner Fanstuff Wiki
Welcome to OCE Gunhaver's Frequently Asked Questions page! This is where questions that ask about somethings unexplained or confusing to fans will be answered! I will answer them in either just answers or in transcripts! For example:
QUESTION: In Paradox, when Gunhaver was knocked out, how did the Cheat Commandos escape Black Laser?
ANSWER:
{Cut to Black Laser on the Persimmon Building's rooftop. Black Laser is at the edge, looking down and looking impatient.}
BLACK LASER: Oh, come on! How long does it take to get to this freakin' building anyway? I mean, I have to do villainous stuff here, and I can't wait here all night to wait for one idiot! {Pause} Fine, I'll show the Cheat Commandos no mercy!
{Suddenly, Foxface walks onscreen and whacks Black Laser on the head with her bulletproof handbag, knocking Black Laser to the floor.}
FOXFACE: You forgot to lock our cages.
{The rest of the Cheat Commandos captured by Black Laser walk onscreen.}
FLASHFIGHT: Now let's see who the culprit really is.
SILENT RIP: Is that really necessary?
FIGHTGAR: Yes.
{Flashfight takes off Black Laser's mechanical eye and hood to reveal the Cheat on the floor to be the Jokester!}
CHEAT COMMANDOS: The Jokester???
JOKESTER: Yes, it is I, the Jokester, here to pull off the greatest Late April Fools prank ever!
FIGHTGAR: Well, you failed. But it is April Killing Day.
SILENT RIP: It is?
FLASHFIGHT: Yes, it is. Cheat Commandos, get your guns ready!
JOKESTER: Yeah? Well, you'll never get me alive!
{The Jokester jumps off the building. The Cheat Commandos watch him fall at the edge of the building. A crash is heard off-screen, making the Cheat Commandos cringe.}
JOKESTER: {off-screen and very weakly} See! Told you you'll never get me alive!
And that's how it goes. Of course, I can just write an explanation. Now, GO!
Contents |
Post Your Questions Here
Questions That Were Answered
Question 4
QUESTION: What's the deal with everyone dying in the email Ragnarok?
ANSWER: Back when Ragnarok wasn't meant to be the final email (of the canon), the laser blasts on Earth were still going to happen. It's just that some copped-out deus ex machina would've saved the Cheat Commandos, so that they could rebel against Black Laser in the next season. Lame, huh? Well, then it's decided that Ragnarok was going to be the last email. Okay. A way to go out in style. I mean, the bad guys win, for one.
Question 3
QUESTION: Uh.... sorry... I'm not so good with computers... How do you watch the emails? Can you?
ANSWER: It's a thing called imagination~... Just foolin' ya. If you want to be able to watch the emails, meet me in some dark alley. I'll be the guy in the trenchcoat and overlarge hat. I'll give you my program and some of my candy if you bring you-know-what.
Question 2
QUESTION: If you weren't reading this email show for a long time, what's a good place to start reading?
ANSWER: Well...
{Cut to Gunhaver in front of the Orange 02. He just sits there. The words "SEASON 1" appear.}
VOICE: If you start with season 1, you'd probably quit reading this email show, because the first season sucks. Believe me. It's happened before with other webtoons.
{Cut to Gunhaver in front of the Delta 1001. The words "Strong Bad E-mails are fun to copy off of!" are on the screen. The words "SEASON 2" appear.}
VOICE: If you start with season 2, you may have some hope, for the season was a little better than the first season, but not as much. In fact, there are a bunch of emails that are basically Strong Bad emails modified to fit the environment. Also, some emails are short and boring, such as "short email" or "Wedginator". Luckily for you, there are two revised emails, one of which was a great hit, but you have to consider that the original versions sucked. One of the original versions was considered to be the worst Gunhaver Email ever. It wasn't even a Gunhaver Email! It was a WUE! So is email 20. And the special sucked. So, no.
{Cut to Gunhaver in front of the Delta 1001. Gunhaver has a tranquilizer dart in his head, and Arrowhaver is looking manically at him. Meanwhile, the words "Haver Gun sucks!" are on the Delta screen. The words "SEASON 3" appear.}
VOICE: I think season 3's a good start, but the first emails were bad. Two sbemail clones (one of which had elements of not one, but two Strong Bad emails), a crappy email (Switched), and some confusing emails. I think a good place to start is Unused Emails if you're planning to start with season 3. Besides, a really good plot starts here.
{The pizza animation from Unused emails appears on the Delta screen. Cut to Gunhaver in front of the Delta 1001, typing, fighting Blue Laser, Blue Laser robots, Contestro, and Arrowhaver. Everything is in fast-motion. The words "SEASON 4" flash on the screen once due to the fast-motion.}
VOICE: Season 4 was considered good when it was fresh. Now, it was kind of rushed, and it WAS rushed; an average of one email a day! And there were some sbemail clones and some crappy emails. Nevertheless, this season's kind of important in terms of plot, and the 50th email was better than email 25. Heck, it's good!
{Cut to Gunhaver in front of the Alpha 1260. Stealing is playing on the computer screen. The poorly-drawn words "SEASON 5" appear.}
VOICE: Season 5 was good. It had a nice plot, nice villains, a better computer that's loved around the world (probably), and probably the best email in the email show, Stealing.
PTBS GUNHAVER: {off-screen} OMG! Email 58 is probably the best email ever! Blue Laser's house is doomed!
VOICE: There were some not-so-good emails, but it's a nice place to start... but you'll be confused... and you don't want to be Super Sam...
HIGH-PITCHED VOICE: {off-screen} Hey!
{Cut to Gunhaver in front of the Alpha 1260. Around him are a bunch of characters involved in season 6. On the Alpha screen is a REALLY long email. The words "SEASON 6" appear on the screen.}
VOICE: Season 6 was good, although not all emails were good. However, this season had long emails and DEFINITELY confused a certain Sam with the length and characters.
{Cut to Gunhaver facing Shadow. The words "SEASON 7 and 8" appear on the screen.}
VOICE: Season 7 was good, but had a bad email, Instability. However, it had nice emails, such as Toast, HAL 9000, or Rated G. A new plot started here with a costumed figure. However, this is not a good place to start, as there's a crap load of good content before season 7.
{Cut to a black screen where there are the words "WHAT WILL YOU CHOOSE?" appear on the screen.}
VOICE: The words explain it. It's your decision, though your decision is helped with the information I just gave you. Overall, man, this answer's freakin' long.
Question 1
QUESTION: If Contestro is a good guy after the events of Paradox, what happened during emails 52-57 and 59-62?
ANSWER: Well, the best way to answer this question is to cover what happened in the 50 emails between Black Laser and Paradox, but that'd not only be a waste of time, but repetetive. Anyway, some events occurred in Seasons 5 and 6, but they're unintentional to the present. So you can just say "anything that doesn't make a dramatic effect to the present".
