X is the new Y/2
From Homestar Runner Fanstuff Wiki
Contents |
About
Yvonne goes to the 'pet store' for a new pet. Marissa meets Strong Sad and Marzipan.
CAST: Yvonne, Marissa, The cheat, Strong bad, Bubs, Xaviar, Strong sad (mentioned), Marzipan(mentioned)
SETTING: The grill, The field, Bub's concession stand (outside and inside), The stick
Transcript
{cuts to Marissa and Yvonnes room. the two are sleeping on turned over kitchen chairs. yvonne gets up, and leaves the room. cuts to the kitchen. Yvonne walks in, and grabs a cup of coffee on the counter. she then notices the cheat, apparently asleep on the table}
YVONNE: Good morning, cheesy. {two second pause} Um... the cheat?
{the screen pans to yvonnes eyes. the camera slowly zooms in}
YVONNE: {thinking} I thought the cheat was dead. So I did the only logical thing to do at this point; totally call the docter.
{zooms back out. Yvonne pours her coffee on the cheat, whom instantaneously wakes up}
THE CHEAT: {painful the cheat noises}
YVONNE: Good morning to you, too.
{zooms back in to yvonnes eyes}
YVONNE: {thinking} And I totally didn't waste my decaf.
{zooms back out}
THE CHEAT: {annoyed the cheat noises}
YVONNE: Well, I didn't mean to wake you! I thought you were dead!
THE CHEAT: {bargaining noises}
YVONNE: Forgetting the whole ordeal would be better. Forgiveness? {holds out her hand}
THE CHEAT: {happy the cheat noises} {shakes yvonnes hand}
{marissa walks in}
MARISSA: I just had the weirdest dream. What do you think coffee covered cheese would taste like?
{everyone pauses for a second. then the cheat and Yvonne quickly get into another argument, with the two yelling incoherently.}
MARISSA: Wow. This house is already disfunctional! {a loud noise is suddenly heard.} WAAGH! What's happening! {runs offscreen}
{cuts to outside the grill. strong bad is knocking on the lid of the grill.}
STRONG BAD: The cheat! I totally have the videogame that I didn't hide from you!
{the lid opens. marissa climbs out of the grill}
MARISSA: What are you doing!?!
STRONG BAD: Um... waking up the cheat?
MARISSA: It was like an earthquake in there!
STRONG BAD: You haven't ever been waken up by strong mad.
MARISSA: And another thing...
STRONG BAD: Hold on a second.
MARISSA: What?
STRONG BAD: You're beginning to sound like mom.
MARISSA: Sounding like mom is nothing compared to not being able to sleep! What about furniture? We had to sleep on chairs!
STRONG BAD: Just grind up a pencil, and go over to bubs!
MARISSA: What?
STRONG BAD: Bub's takes pencil shavings as currency.
MAIRSSA: Who's bubs?
STRONG BAD: The blue guy at the consession stand. It's right over the-
MARISSA: I can find a concession stand on my own, thank you. {walks offscreen to the left}
{the cheat flies out of the grill lid. yvonne climbs out, covered in scratches}
STRONG BAD: Woah, what ha-
YVONNE: WE. NEED. FURNITURE!!!
STRONG BAD: Calm down! Just take this {holds up a bad of pencil shavings, and tosses it to yvonne} and follow me.
{yvonne opens the bag, and looks in it}
YVONNE: Wha-
STRONG BAD: Never mind. {walks offscreen to the right. Yvonne follows}
{cuts to bub's concession stand. bubs is standing there. The sign reads 'pets - 50% off!'. Yvonne and strong bad walk onscreen.}
YVONNE: Um... Who are you?
STRONG BAD: Bubs. he's a lonely old guy with no life.
BUBS: I havent seen you before!
YVONNE: Hello! I'm... Um... Simone U. Dono.
STRONG BAD: Righ- wait, I didn't know you sell pets!
BUBS: They're in the basement.
YVONNE: A pet would be nice... do you take {holds up the bag} pencil shavings?
BUBS: It's on the list! {checks the bag} With this many, I'll let you get... a pet, and... two large pieces of furniture, or a homestar.
YVONNE: Perfect! I'd like to see your pet selection!
BUBS: Right this way! {presses a button. a round patch of grass yvonne and strong bad are on lowers}
YVONNE: Cool.
{cuts to a large grey room. many cages with birds are seen all around. the round patch of grass comes down. yvonne and strong bad stepp off it. bubs walks in}
BUBS: Just tell me if you find one you like. {walks off screen}
STRONG BAD: Woah, he has scorpions? {runs offscreen}
???: {scraggley voice} Psst. Hey, missy.
YVONNE: Huh? Who's there?
???: Over here.
{yvonne walks to the right. the screen pans quickly to a rainbow bird}
YVONNE: Was that you?
???: Yes. You need to get me out of here! I can't stand it here!
YVONNE: Who are you?
XAVIAR: Xaviar. Just get me out of here!
YVONNE: I do have enough to buy a pet...
XAVIAR: Please! It's either me, or that red potato guy gets a scorpio-
{cuts to the front of the concession stand yvonne is standing in front of it, with xaviar on her arm.}
YVONNE: I'd like to buy this bird.
BUBS: Will that be all?
YVONNE: I would also like to small beds.
BUBS: I repeat; will that be all?
YVONNE: Yes.
BUBS: The beds will be transported to your adress. Where do you live?
YVONNE: Um... in a grill...
BUBS: I know exactly where your talking about! Enjoy your new pet!
YVONNE: Thank you! {walks off screen}
{cuts to the stick. marissa is sitting there. yvonne walks onscreen, with xaviar flying close by.}
YVONNE: Hey, Marissa!
MARISSA: Aw, what a cute bird!
XAVIAR: I do have some dignity.
MARISSA: Um...
YVONNE: How was your day?
MARISSA: Good!
YVONNE: What'd you do?
{the camera angle turns. marissa is hiding a book labled 'poetry book' behind her back. 'from strong sad and marzipan' is written on it}
MARISSA: Oh, much of nothing. {the camera turns back} What's with the talking bird?
XAVIAR: Bubs was holding me hostage!
YVONNE: He owns a pet store.
XAVIAR: So? It was pure torture there!
MARISSA: I see you are having a weird day, too?
YVONNE: You have no idea.
{the screen fades to black}
Easter Eggs
None.
Fun Facts
- Simone U. Dono is a play on 'someone you don't know'.
