Other Character Email Tampo/attacked/Commentary

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  • The DVD version features a hidden commentary for Tampo Email #14: "attacked." To access it, switch your DVD player's audio language selection while watching.

Commentary Transcript

(Commentary by: Joshua, Shim-Sham-Sam)

JOSHUA: Hello, everybody. I'm hear doing the commentary for "attacked," which... is quite possibly one of the best Tampo Emails I ever made. And Shim-Sham-Sam's here, he's the guy who sent this email.

SHIM-SHAM-SAM: And since I sent the email of one of the best Tampo Emails ever made, I win... some stuff... that aren't snakes. {pause} Hey Mario. Do you know who this warehouse's interior designer is?

JOSHUA: Stop biting Markie's style. Anyway... I've never thought about who built the lunar warehouse. It's just been a useful plot device, that's all...

SHIM-SHAM-SAM: Yeah. So, I wonder how many people were confused by the intro because they didn't read email 13.5? I mean, sure, it was a regular OCE Tampo update, but it was a Not Quite Email.

JOSHUA: Mm hmm... some light readers probably were a bit confused, but if they didn't watch Tampo Emails enough to see the crossover, they'd probably assume that they just missed something. Which can happen when you're just lightly reading through.

SHIM-SHAM-SAM: Yeah, and that'd suck a bit. It's like watching a Yu-Gi-Oh episode that continues after another episode that you didn't watch, or something, although you have more control in reading emails here than watching episodes on TV. Anyway, now we get to the email checking part. Is this the first email where the boss trio actually check an email on the SuperCom? I mean, Brody checked it in the email where Zyves appears, but that's just Brody. Also, where did the SuperCom come from? Am I asking too many questions for you to answer?

JOSHUA: Yes, who knows, and no. To go into the middle question, the SuperCom came from whoever owned this house. Who apparently was a giant and just so happened to have a mega-computer. I guess when he moved it he didn't bother taking all his stuff with him, because the house seems to be furnished.

SHIM-SHAM-SAM: A giant, you say... anyway, if you want to know, I sent the Nebulon and 1-Up email to Tampo not because I'm like, "OMG! It's a NEW LEVEL of Stinkoman 20X6! Time to pester Tampo with it, and, like... be famous or be in agony but I don't care!", but because I thought it was a big coincidence that after you made the boss trio live on the moon, TBC make a level of 1-Up on the moon.

JOSHUA: Yeah, it was a pretty big coincidence. But it also messed up the order I now plan on using, which is to introduce the bosses in order. This is the only exception, it then goes Saargtsson to Liekand. An Ice Machine will be next. I'm already thinking up ideas for his personality and introduction.

SHIM-SHAM-SAM: Well, I guess I can be sure an Ice Machine won't use ice puns, right? I mean, the characters you use are in your control. And I guess Harvax in an Easter Egg of our latest creation doesn't count for you, eh? Anyway, thought the "send him on a one way trip to the sun" was funny, thought Neeblie's an interesting name, and thought at first that my efforts to make an interesting email were in vain when the present-day Nebulon was talked about.

JOSHUA: Stinkoman did get a one way trip to the sun in "saargtsson" when he rescued 1-Up, so that was a pretty weird coincidence right there. And, yep, that Harvax didn't count. That was just a cameo of a Harvax from another fanstuff. I have no idea where I got Neeblie from, and to answer your third "thought," never underestimate the power of a Tampo Email.

SHIM-SHAM-SAM: Well, I learned my lesson. So, your inspiration for the name NEB-1, which started a craze, came from the image name of the 20X6 Nebulon on the Knowledge-Base, right? Anyway, is this still the time when the email show was based on Stinkoman 20X6, or was it just a reference?

JOSHUA: No, Tampo Emails split up from Stinkoman 20X6 sometime during the move to the Lunar Warehouse. Now it simply is a game that they took part in that is loosely based on thier lives. And no, I didn't get the name from the Knowledge Base image, that's a Tampo Email reference that I inserted in there and no one noticed. I actually got the name from his graffiti tag in Hip Hop Dance.

SHIM-SHAM-SAM: And that is a reference to... um... Star Trek? Anyway, are Astromunds really mindless? I imagine them to be the second most human-like minions in the game, with Poorbts being in first place.

JOSHUA: Yeah, Mr. Astromund's Blog. Anyways, no, Astromunds aren't mindless. I mean, they were in this email, but Stlunko probably got his facts wrong... or Astromunds evolved... or some other plot hole like that. If you'll remember "threats," you'll remember that Astromunds, at least some of them, are quite capable of thought.

SHIM-SHAM-SAM: Oh yeah. I remember. You evolved the Astromunds from mindless drones of Nebulon to suicidal psychos. Speaking of the blog... let's not. Instead, "there's a room full or stuff"? Of course, don't fret that much. I just found it right now.

JOSHUA: They aren't so much as suicidal psychos as they are extreme loyalists to NEB-1. And... um... a typo, eh? I think I might have had one o' those. Or maybe it isn't a typo?! Maybe Tampo's talking in a Coach Z-ish accent for some reason? YOU GOT A PROBLEM WIT DAT?! {coughs}

SHIM-SHAM-SAM: ...Okay... I was just about to talk about this email having a contraction and excusing you for it since this email was very long... but... instead, I'll talk about those parked space ships. Whose are those? Are those NEB-1's? If not, then whose? That one giant's?

JOSHUA: The contraction no longer exists!!! Anyhoo... I do not know what those parked ships are doing there. Probably some leftover props or something, I don't remember them. Probably just some background feature that I just inserted into there without thinking about it.

SHIM-SHAM-SAM: Wow... we definitely are unearthing attacked, eh? Anyway... the minions come and are given weapons. Too bad that this is no longer a video game universe. They still would have had their "touch of death". Of course, I don't think the "touch of death" works against enemies, right?

JOSHUA: No, that seems to only work on Stinkoman and 1-Up. Besides, shooting your enemies to kill 'em is much cooler than... just poking them. And... this is like the only time Stobats can move quickly. Part of the difficulty with Tampo and Brody's minions is that except for Chorches and Stobats, they don't have arms. So fortunately the old owner had a bunch of small headset weapons for the armless minions to use. And the Stobats can still vomit out bones.

SHIM-SHAM-SAM: That's good to hear, except for the fact that the armless minions are more helpless than 1-Up or Homestar. Now we go into the battle. {pause} Speaking of how minions fight, how do Astromunds fight in times like this? Whack with shields, or use cannon arms, like in Ekul's Stinkoman sprite comics?

JOSHUA: Good question. Umm... they don't have arm cannons. They probably use their shield to block attacks and engage in hand-to-whatever combat.

SHIM-SHAM-SAM: Well, I guess being whacked with shields and fists do hurt. No wonder the boss trio thought this battle was going to be a breeze. Anyway, what are those flying probes for? And the lockdown is to prevent the invaders from advancing further into the warehouse, right?

JOSHUA: Well, the boss trio has the better army, so they had a reason to be confident. The probes are probably a part of the warehouse's defense system... yeah, let's go with that. And the lockdown was to stop any Astromunds from infiltrating the warehouse. They did break through the domed passageway, you know.

SHIM-SHAM-SAM: That's great. But let's get back to the Astromund subject. Um, I think they do have projectiles, for as you said yourself, "There are bunches of minions from both sides shooting each other with each lasers and the like". I'll say cannon arms are probably their secondary weapons.

JOSHUA: Well, I suppose they could be holding laser guns. But no cannon arms. Sorry.

SHIM-SHAM-SAM: Just as long as they don't do hand-to-whatever combat anymore. Anyway, here's the roaring NEB-1 and the classic "no one likes your style". Then Tampo and Brody get down. And now, Stlunko's the last one alive, which kind of contradicts my view of Tampo always being the one standing, like in virus or revolution.

JOSHUA: Yep, I guess it does. Now that- that F.O.R.C.E is a useful power right there. I originally planned on getting that power installed into Stlunko, so he could use it all the time in combat... but that never quite worked out.

SHIM-SHAM-SAM: That could have been useful against Saargtsson. Instead, F.O.R.C.E. turned out to be used against them. Anyway, good-bye NEB-1. Have fun going to that planet with the pig-headed people. {pause} Okay, so the boss trio win. Yay.

JOSHUA: Well, Saargtsson didn't use the F.O.R.C.E specifically, but rather some other forcefield device. And, um, about the pig-headed people: wrong universe. Here, the forcefield protected NEB-1 as he crashed into Planet K, where he went to whatever city Mr. Cradgage lived in. Tampo saw him and recorded it into his blog... I'm not sure if you read the blog, but it contained plot points for the emails. Like, what happened to NEB-1. The Master was going to recruit NEB-1, but then holographic nukes hit the area, and NEB-1 panicked and ran away. Yep, that's what happened. No idea how he got back on the moon.

SHIM-SHAM-SAM: I almost forgot about that! Probably because Tampo's blog is inactive. Anyway, I guess NEB-1 can always fly back to the moon, or at least hi-jack a ship to the moon, if he knows how. Of course, maybe his Astromunds will wisen up and find a way to help NEB-1 get back to the moon. Anyway, here comes 1-Up, which starts a plot. Y'know, whenever I see this scene in my mind's eye, I always imagine 1-Up in his sprite form instead of the "real" form.

JOSHUA: Good. Because Tampo Emails would all be "sprites." All the bosses and minions are sprites, so if it were animated, it'd look like the sprite comics. Now it was already very long, so I was unsure if I wanted to add this 1-Up part. But then I decided 1-Up's cool, and I needed to answer the entire email, and that it wouldn't make it too much longer. I like 1-Up.

SHIM-SHAM-SAM: Good, since that started an interesting plot. Me? I find him so-and-so. Now, do you ever wonder that 1-Up might have destroyed something very important, that if it was used in a Tampo email that takes place after this, things would have been completely different? Because I didn't until right now.

JOSHUA: I don't know... he destroyed a bunch of computers in the walls... whatever he did, it wasn't too bad and Tampo's minions fixed it before the next email. Anyway, now 1-Up is locked up. The boss trio is fortunate that the F.O.R.C.E. happens to block teleporting. And now this great email is coming to a close...

SHIM-SHAM-SAM: And here is where that now-nonexistant Stlunko contraction was made. I wonder when Tampo will finally remember my name by the end of an email.

JOSHUA: ...nope, he says "What's Your Name." But you did get kudos from Tampo. Aren't you proud? Email's ending... an Easter egg will be coming up soon.

SHIM-SHAM-SAM: And here it is. If it's true that 1-Up's father is Homestar (which, I think, is just an opinion), then I guess he got that crying trait from him.

JOSHUA: I revealed in email #32 that he's a robot, and Homestar and Strong Bad built him.

SHIM-SHAM-SAM: Anyway, this ends the commentary. Thanks for your time.

JOSHUA: Bye, Shim-Sham-Sam. Thanks.