Other Character Email Strong Man/Jumpin' Jack
From Homestar Runner Fanstuff Wiki
Transcript
STRONG MAN: {With musical notes} (I'm just so emailing nerdy!)
Dear Block buddie,
Have a jumping jack contest!!!!
From, Man-o-man
STRONG MAN: (Woah. To correspond with Jumpin' Jack's slightly annual competition!)
{Cut to a field. A dumpy man walks in}
JUMPIN' JACK: {In a low-pitched, frail voice} Hello, welcome me, Jumping Jack, contest, pie throwing, go, contestants...
{As he says the following the camera pans to show that character and their name fades in in bold writing}
JUMPIN' JACK: Strong Man...
STRONG MAN: (I'll get the money for sir...he blackmailed me into it)
JUMPIN' JACK:The Sneak...
'THE SNEAK:" {Waves noise, does a dance}
JUMPIN' JACK: Strong Bad...
OLD-TIMEY STRONG BAD: I'll drop out purposfully, and my gorilla will get the rust medal!
JUMPIN' JACK: And, Homcar.
HOMCAR: Thy world is a pom`egramate-th! OooOoOooO-
OLD-TIMEY STRONG BAD: {Offscreen} Be quiet!
{Cut to The Homestar Runner}
THE HOMESTAR RUNNER: What about me mister?
{Cut back to Jumpin' Jack. The Homestar is standing next to him}
JUMPIN' JACK: I, can, not, say, your, name, without, dyeing, of, over, six, teen, hundred, billion, million, thousand, illnessess, or, viruses, or...
{His voice trails off. Cut to The Homestar. He falls asleep. OTSB runs in}
OLD-TIMEY STRONG BAD: Why are you resting you buck-tooth-ed fool! This man is a different form of smashing!
THE HOMESTAR RUNNER: {Wakes up} No he is not.
OLD-TIMEY STRONG BAD: Then I challenge you to a duel!
{Cut to Jumpin' Jack}
JUMPIN' JACK: Okay, everyone, time, for, the, pie-throwing.
{Cut to a small stage Strong Man walks on. OTSB goes to walk up and bumbs into Strong Man.}
OLD-TIMEY STRONG BAD: What? You fool! You so large that there is no space to get on!
STRONG MAN: (And your a beauty queen t-)
{The stage Strong Man is on breaks. Homcar drives in}
HOMCAR:' OoOOooooo, Why is thy greeneth goop on thy leg?
{Cut to the oldie}
STRONG MAN: {Typing} (I don't like bieng fat. Wait-) {Types as weight} (-I'm not fat... I'm strong stro-)
{Cut to a view of the Oldie. OTSB is there}
OLD-TIMEY STRONG BAD: Time to use you as oil for my c-
HOMCAR: {drving in} OoOOooOOOooOOOooOOOOOooOoooooOOOOooOooOoOOOOO, lol!
{Strong Man runs away. OTSB sits on the stool}
OLD-TIMEY STRONG BAD: {Typing} Yes he is! He is very fat! He is overweight! That is right-
FUN CO.: {Rolls on} {Beebs like R2-D2}
OLD-TIMEY STRONG BAD: That's how I speak! Anyway! {Typing} He is large!
STRONG MAN: [Offscreen} Quit it!
OLD-TIMEY STRONG BAD: That is it! You're fired!
SINGERS: Dun, dun daaaaaaa.
{The paper comes down}
Easter eggs
- Click "large" to see this
{Cut to Jumpin' Jack}
JUMPIN' JACK: I, wanted, pies.
THE HOMESTAR RUNNER: I'll give you them! {Throws a pie at Jumpin' Jack. Jumpin' Jack falls over}
{End}
