Other Character Email Pan Pan/Technology/Easter Egg3

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Easter Egg 3

April Fools Version of Technology (Part 2)

{Cut to 1-Up waking up in his bed. Only his lower body's visible.}

1-UP: {yawning} I'm awake. Now it's time to start another day! I think I'll have pudding for breakfast!

{1-Up gets up from his bed. However, when he leaves his bed, 1-Up's lower body is still lying on the bed. Ominous music starts to play.}

{Cut to the kitchen. Stinkoman and Pan Pan are having breakfast (Stinkoman-shaped pancakes and rice, respectively).}

STINKOMAN: Man! WHAT'S taking 1-Up so long to wake up! It's 10 AM!!!

PAN PAN: (You have to consider that we're eating breakfast late.)

STINKOMAN: Oh, yeah.

PAN PAN: (Just wait. I kind of prefer mornings when 1-Up oversleeps. More calm, especially for my frequent headaches.)

{1-Up runs onscreen, slips, and falls onto the floor. Then he gets up}

1-UP: Hey guys! 1-Up's awake! I want breakfast!

{Stinkoman and Pan Pan, still eating, do not react to 1-Up's appearance.}

1-UP: Uh... guys? Hello? {whining} I don't want to get the breakfast by myself!

{Stinkoman and Pan Pan don't pay attention to 1-Up's whines.}

1-UP: Fine.

{1-Up goes to the refridgerator and makes to open it. However, the door doesn't open.}

1-UP: Eh? What is this? Why can't the door open? Wah! It must be hating "no-arms" today!

{1-Up runs to Stinkoman.}

1-UP: Stinkoman! Stinkoman! Stinkoman! The white box has gone evil!

{Stinkoman doesn't pay attention to 1-Up.}

1-UP: What is this? Some kind of game! I think I lo-

{Suddenly, 1-Up trips and falls, falling through Stinkoman and his chair. He gets a look of complete shock as his breathing speeds up.}

1-UP: I'm dead... I'm dead... I'm a ghost!

{1-Up screams and sprints to the right, shrieking. The camera follows 1-Up as he runs through a wall and to outside. 1-Up runs by 20X6 Marzipan.}

1-UP: {crying} WAHHH!!!! I'm dead! I'm dead! I'm dead! I'm a ghost! I died! I'm dead! I'm an invisible ghost! I died! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!

{1-Up runs offscreen.}

20X6 MARZIPAN: Oh dear... that means I'm dead too if normal people are ignoring me and if I can see ghosts.

{1-Up runs back onscreen, running to the left, screaming and crying.}

20X6 MARZIPAN: E-excuse me...

1-UP: {crying} ...dead! I'm dead! I died! I'm a ghost! I died young! I didn't even get to eat Mount Puddimanjaro! WAHHH!!! WHY DID I HAVE TO DIE???

{1-Up runs off-screen. 20X6 Marzipan sighs.}

20X6 MARZIPAN: I guess I died twice if he ignored me: Once as a human, and once as a ghost.

{Cut to 1-Up running through a wall, back into the kitchen. He runs past Stinkoman and Pan Pan (still having breakfast), and runs through another wall to outside. He runs through an open door and down a set of stairs. He runs in the room with the floating incinerator from before. The floating incinerator "vomiting" sparks and lava more violently than before. The camera stops here as 1-Up continues to run off-screen, crying. Suddenly, the floating incinerator begins to shake violently. A red light appears on the incinerator and flashes, letting out a very loud alarm. Pan Pan and Stinkoman run onscreen from the right.}

STINKOMAN: What is this? What's happening?

PAN PAN: (It's that incinerator! It was "sick" yesterday, and I think it's about to blow!)

STINKOMAN: Man, what did you feed that thing?

PAN PAN: (Do you know 1-Up's ke-)

INCINERATOR: {high-pitched robotic voice} DANGER! DANGER! INCINERATOR CAN NOT AVOID CHEMICALLY REACTING WITH THE URANIUM FOUND IN THE SECOND-TO-LAST ITEM DROPPED INTO THE INCINERATOR!!! CAN NOT AVOID CHEMICALLY REACTING WITH THE URANIUM! PEOPLE ARE PRESENT! CAN NOT EXPLODE IN A BIG, NUCLEAR EXPLOSION! EMERGENCY PLAN A CAN NOT PROCEED! INCINERATOR MUST GO TO EMERGENCY PLAN B!

STINKOMAN: WHAT?!? This is bad, right?

PAN PAN: (Very bad. I just hope the incinerator's plan B is going to be sa-)

{Just then, the incinerator disappears. Suddenly, everything fad

April Fools Version of Diet

{Cut to various views of the city in Planet K. Slow, cool music plays as the views are shown. Cut to a building named "Convenient Electronics". Cut to a room in Convenient Electronics, where an employee who's half-panda and half-human is seen behind a counter. Around him are shelves of electronics and customers. Suddenly, a crash is heard as a black object quickly falls in front of the employee, shocking him. Then the employee regains his cool. Cut to the black object, Pan Pan.}

EMPLOYEE: Jeez, Pan Pan. Do you always have to come in like that?

PAN PAN: (Well, I like coming in style. Now, you know why I'm here.)

EMPLOYEE: Don't tell me.

PAN PAN: (Do you have another one in stock?)

EMPLOYEE: Again?!? That's the 37th broken Pan Pilot this month!

PAN PAN: (Well, if you're living with 1-Up, 37's a small number.

EMPLOYEE: {sighs} What did he do this time?

{Cut to a close-up of 1-Up in a hallway in Stinkoman HQ.}

1-UP: Hey Pan Pan!

{Pan out to reveal 1-Up's dashing down the hall with an electric chainsaw.}

1-UP: Check it out! I'm running a relay race!

{1-Up runs to Pan Pan.}

PAN PAN: BADDALANG!!!!!!

{Cut back to Pan Pan with the employee. He has his incinerated and mutilated Pan Pilot out.}

PAN PAN: (This thing's force field saved my life, but it failed to save the Pan Pilot itself, again. Anyway, can we make the business deal already?)

EMPLOYEE: Actually, I think you need something else. Something better.

{The employee gets out a box from below the counter and gets out a small, rectangular machine with a sensor bar.}

EMPLOYEE: Presenting the OptiPilot XZ, a new PDA that has an advanced email checker, word-processor, animating program, hologram projector, and an Indy-G Force that allows the weight of the OptiPilot to be changed at will (so this can be used as a nice bludgeoning weapon). This thing has a sensor bar that can register to your touch so it can be touch-sensitive! Also, this can translate your "Baddalangs" into English text and you can use your mind for limited benefits!

PAN PAN: (That's nice. No doubt you left out a bunch of other stuff.)

EMPLOYEE: You bet! That's what I'm good at!

PAN PAN: (The Indy-G Force thing sounds nice. So how much is it?)

EMPLOYEE: This, my friend, if nin...

{Just then, a thought bubble pops up from the employee's head. The thought bubble forms a scene where Pan Pan is surrounded by bamboo sticks and scarecrows. Pan Pan is blindfolded and has a samurai sword. Despite his weight, he quickly cuts all of the bamboo sticks into bite-sized pieces of the same size. Then he goes and quickly and cleanly cuts off all of the scarecrows' heads. The thought bubble pops as we cut back to the employee.}

EMPLOYEE: {nervously} Actually, this is special service, so this is free.

PAN PAN: (Really? Nice! (Even though I have about $979 right now.))

{Cut to an exterior view of Stinkoman HQ. Cut to Pan Pan in his room, which is decorated with bamboo sticks. Pan Pan gets out the Optipilot, which shoots a light beam at Pan Pan's right eye.}

OPTIPILOT: {robotic voice} Retina scan complete. OptiPilot XZ Model 2T2737 now belongs to user Pan Pan. Activating his email account, "flyingpanda529@cocomail.com".

PAN PAN: (What? Didn't ask for that yet! Oh well, I guess I should check my email. It was left unchecked for two years...)

OPTIPILOT: {robotic voice} Sadly, you have only one email that wasn't lose in cyberspace. Here it is.

{Just then, a hologram screen shoots out from the OptiPilot. Pan Pan reads the email (in "Baddalangs") on the screen.}

PAN PAN: (Clicking? Clicking is so X0 years ago! I think what you want me to do is this.)

{Just then, "[Click for info]" glows in multicolor. Just then, a ship crashes into Pan Pan's room and nearly hits Pan Pan, who jumps out of the way at the right time. The ship's door opens and a Stobat, dressed up as a coach and sitting on a floating platform, floats out of the ship and looks at Pan Pan.}

STOBAT COACH : So, you're Pan Pan, eh? 70,000 Zetas, eh?

PAN PAN: (Yeah, but what the crap do you mean in Zetas and Zeta Arts?)

STOBAT COACH: No askin' questions, eh! We've got work to do, eh!

PAN PAN: (You're just showing off with the acc-)

{Suddenly, a floating incinerator, violently shaking and letting off sparks and lava while letting out a loud siren, appears.}

INCINERATOR: {extremely high-pitched robotic voice} INCINERATOR HAS MALFUNCTIONED!!! EMERGENCY PLAN B HAS NOT BEEN PERFORMED PERFECTLY! INCINERATOR HAS TRAVELED TO A DANGEROUS TIME PERIOD!

STOBAT COACH: Eh?!?

PAN PAN: (Hey! That looks like that floating incinerator down in the base-)

INCINERATOR: {higher-pitched robotic voice} MUST DETONATE!!!!

{Cut to a view of the city in Planet K. Suddenly, a giant, nuclear explosion occurs, engulfing the entire city and the vicinity in flames. The sky darkens as the explosion ends, revealing a giant, burning wasteland.}