Homestar Runner's Trading Card Game/games/6

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Contents 1 Playing Statistics 1.1 Players 1.2 Board Type 1.3 Rewards 2 The Game 2.1 Players 2.2 Turn 9 2.3 Turn 8 2.3.1 Wrestling Time 2.3.2 Wrestling Time 2.3.3 Wrestling Time 2.4 Turn 7 2.4.1 Wrestling Time 2.5 Turn 6 2.5.1 Wrestling Time 2.6 Turn 5 2.7 Turn 4 2.7.1 Wrestling Time 2.8 Turn 3 2.8.1 Wrestling Time 2.9 Turn 2 2.10 Turn 1 2.10.1 Wrestling Time 2.11 Setup Process

Playing Statistics

Players

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• Stinkoman K (Deck: 20X6!)
• Joshua (Deck: Dangeresque)
• Super Sam (Deck: The Clamburgers)
• Freldman? (Deck: 1936)

Board Type

Seven row Towers — 9 turns

Rewards

• First Place: 85 credits (Super Sam)
• Second Place: 55 credits (User:Joshua)
• Last Place: 15 credits (Stinkoman K, Freldman?)

The Game

Players

Joshua

Cards in deck: 1

Cards in hand: 1 — The Poopsmith (Silent, 5/3/2);

Cards on field: 2 — Perducci (Lame, 5/1/4); Dangeresque Too (Cool, wildcard [5/4/1]); Renaldo (Smart, 2/5/3)

Total points: 8

Freldman?

Cards in deck: 3

Cards in hand: 0

Cards on field: 2 — The Homestar Runner (Strange, 4/2/4); The Sneak (Silent, 5/1/4)

Total points: 0

Super Sam

Cards in deck: 2

Cards in hand: 0

Cards on field: 3 — 1-Up (Moron, 2/5/3); Homestar Runner (Moron, 2/4/4); Homeschool Winner (Lame, 3/3/4)

Total points: 17

Stinkoman K

Cards in deck: 2

Cards in hand: 0

Cards on field: 2 — Cheatball (Lame, 6/1/3), Pan Pan (Silent, wildcard [3/1/6])

Total points: 0

Turn 9

JOSHUA: Final turn! I roll for Perducci. {rolls a two} Whatever, up he goes. You're turn, Freldman.

FRELDMAN?: I'll move the Sneak.

JOSHUA: He rolls a four, but remember that he can't beat Renaldo.

FRELDMAN?: He has moved next to 1-Up.

JOSHUA: Calling Super Sam!

SUPER SAM: I choose to do precisely nothing!

JOSHUA: Precisely nothing is done! Stinkoman K, it is time for you to do the last move in the game which will most certainly affect everything.

JOSHUA: {waits a while} Since you seem to be all passed out on the floor, and it is impossible for any single move you make to effect the scores, I hereby call this game OBER!!!!! Super Sam gets first prize, I get second tries, and the other two... neither of you even got a single point. Do you guys even get prizes? I guess you both get the last place prize.

{an hour later}

STINKOMAN K: ...huh? Wha? What's going on? Did I win? {silence} Ohhh...

Turn 8

CLAMBURGER: Joshua's move.

JOSHUA: I roll for Renaldo. {rolls a three} Sweet, I guess. He engages 1-Up with a +2 attack bonus.

Wrestling Time

versus

Smart has an elemental advantage over Moron. Joshua chooses +2 attack.

They have equal speed stats, but Renaldo initiated the fight. Therefore, he attacks first.

• Renaldo attacks 1-Up!
  • 4 < 5
  • 1-Up's defence is lowered to 4.
• 1-Up attacks Renaldo!
  • 2 < 5
  • Renaldo's defence is lowered to 4.
• Renaldo attacks 1-Up!
  • 4 = 4
  • 1-Up's defence is critical!
  • 1-Up's defence is lowered to 3.
• 1-Up attacks Renaldo!
  • 2 < 4
  • Renaldo's defence is lowered to 3.
• Renaldo attacks 1-Up!
  • 4 > 3
  • 1-Up is defeated!

JOSHUA: Alright, I get the throne and start earning some second-place points. Super Sam, get this 1-Up lowlife outta my sight.

CLAMBURGER: Freldman?'s move.

FRELDMAN?: Again, The Sneak shall move up!

JOSHUA: He rolls a three.

FRELDMAN?: I'm not sure if I can do this, but I'll move The Sneak right behind Renaldo. If that's an illegal move, I'll attack 1-Up.

JOSHUA: Perfectly legal. Up he goes! Over to Super Sam.

SUPER SAM: I move Homeschool for no raisin!

JOSHUA: He rolls a three.

SUPER SAM: Sliiiink...

JOSHUA: Go, go, go, Stinkyguy K!

STINKOMAN K: I'll roll for Pan Pan.

JOSHUA: At just one space away, he doesn't even have to roll. He attacks The Sneak.

Wrestling Time

versus

No elemental advantages.

Pan Pan has a higher speed stat. Therefore, he attacks first.

• Pan Pan attacks The Sneak!
  • 1 = 1
  • The Sneak's defence is critical!
  • The Sneak's defence is lowered to 0.
• The Sneak attacks Pan Pan!
  • 5 > 4
  • Pan Pan is defeated!

JOSHUA: And oh snap, he falls down five spaces. Please do so now.

STINKOMAN K: I'll go just above Cheatball.

JOSHUA: Two spaces above Cheatball, actually. His new stats are 3/1/6. And now because The Sneak won the wrestle, he automatically moves one space up and attacks Renaldo.

Wrestling Time

versus

No elemental advantages.

The Sneak has a higher speed stat. Therefore, he attacks first.

• The Sneak attacks Renaldo!
  • 5 = 5
  • Renaldo's defence is critical!
  • Renaldo's defence is lowered to 4.
• Renaldo attacks The Sneak!
  • 2 > 1
  • The Sneak is defeated!

JOSHUA: Aww, too bad. Renaldo keeps the throne and Freldman needs to drop The Sneak down four spaces.

FRELDMAN?: Moved.

JOSHUA: Err... he can't move there because Homestar's in the way. Re-move'd for you!

Turn 7

CLAMBURGER: Over to Joshua.

JOSHUA: I'll roll Renaldo upward. {rolls a one} Ah, snappers. Oh well, into the corner with ye.

FRELDMAN?: The Sneak shall move up!

CLAMBURGER: You have rolled a 2. Select a position for The Sneak.

FRELDMAN?: Behind Renaldo!

SUPER SAM: Draw another card!

CLAMBURGER: You have drawn Homeschool Winner.

SUPER SAM: Place 'im down good.

CLAMBURGER: Stinkoman K's move.

STINKOMAN K: More like, Pan Pan's move! I'll move Pan Pan up to 1-Up. +2 attack.

Wrestling Time

versus

Moron has an elemental advantage over Silent. Super Sam chooses +2 attack.

1-Up has a higher speed stat. Therefore, he attacks first.

• 1-Up attacks Pan Pan!
  • 4 < 6
  • Pan Pan's defence is lowered to 5.
• Pan Pan attacks 1-Up!
  • 3 < 5
  • 1-Up's defence is lowered to 4.
• 1-Up attacks Pan Pan!
  • 4 < 5
  • Pan Pan's defence is lowered to 4.
• Pan Pan attacks 1-Up!
  • 3 < 4
  • 1-Up's defence is lowered to 3.
• 1-Up attacks Pan Pan!
  • 4 = 4
  • Pan Pan's defence is critical!
  • Pan Pan's defence is lowered to 3.
• Pan Pan attacks 1-Up!
  • 3 = 3
  • 1-Up's defence is critical!
  • 1-Up's defence is lowered to 2.
• 1-Up attacks Pan Pan!
  • 4 > 3
  • Pan Pan is defeated!

CLAMBURGER: Pan Pan is moved down a space, and his stats are set to 1/4/5.

Turn 6

CLAMBURGER: 6th turn begins with Joshua.

JOSHUA: I'll move Renaldo again. {rolls a two} Okay, I'll move him up.

CLAMBURGER: Your move, Freldman?.

FRELDMAN?: I'll move The Sneak up.

CLAMBURGER: You have rolled a two and have two options: you can either choose to battle Dangeresque Too or go one space up and to the left.

FRELDMAN?: To the left.

SUPER SAM: I will now plow into Perducci with my Homestar.

Wrestling Time

versus

No elemental advantages.

They have equal speed stats, but Homestar Runner initiated the fight. Therefore, he attacks first.

• Homestar Runner attacks Perducci!
  • 2 > 1
  • Perducci is defeated!

CLAMBURGER: Homestar Runner advances two spaces and Perducci moves down to the bottom space. Stinkoman K's move.

STINKOMAN K: Pan Pan's back! So he slowly approaches 1-Up.

CLAMBURGER: Pan Pan moved.

Turn 5

CLAMBURGER: Go, Joshua.

JOSHUA: I think I'll move Renaldo. {rolls a three} Alright, up he goes around the giant brick called Dangeresque Too.

CLAMBURGER: Your move, Freldman?.

FRELDMAN?: Uh... I'll place The Sneak next to THR.

CLAMBURGER: Complete. Super Sam?

SUPER SAM: Since I have no other logical choice, I'll simply move Homestar up as far as I can.

CLAMBURGER: 2 points.

SUPER SAM: Wah! So close.

CLAMBURGER: Over to you, Stinkoman K.

STINKOMAN K: Pan Pan's back, FOR REVENGE! I'm-a gonna move Pan Pan.

CLAMBURGER: You have moved the only possible amount, 1 space.

Turn 4

CLAMBURGER: Joshua, choose your next move.

JOSHUA: Draw another card. {crosses fingers}

CLAMBURGER: You have drawn Renaldo. Select a space to position him in.

JOSHUA: I'm plopping him on the left side on hoping for the best.

FRELDMAN?: I'll draw a card. THR isn't that great.

JOSHUA: You've drawn The Sneak. Do you want to place him in the last available spot or keep him in your hand for later?

FRELDMAN?: Keep him.

SUPER SAM: I suppose the only thing to do now is draw a card.

CLAMBURGER: Randomising... you drew Homestar.

SUPER SAM: Put him in the last open space.

CLAMBURGER: Homestar successfully placed. Stinkoman K, you can either move one of your cards which is on the board, or draw a new card. Keep in mind that any card you draw cannot be placed down, due to there being no spare spaces on the bottom of the board.

STINKOMAN K: I'm-a gonna move Pan Pan.

CLAMBURGER: You have been allocated 3 move points. Select the move position.

STINKOMAN K: Up to the top!

CLAMBURGER: Battle initiated.

Wrestling Time

versus

Moron has an elemental advantage over Silent. Super Sam chooses +2 attack.

They have equal speed stats, but Pan Pan initiated the fight. Therefore, he attacks first.

• Pan Pan attacks 1-Up!
  • 5 = 5
  • 1-Up's defence is critical!
  • 1-Up's defence is lowered to 4.
• 1-Up attacks Pan Pan!
  • 4 > 2
  • Pan Pan is defeated!

CLAMBURGER: Pan Pan's stats are re-randomised as 3/6/1. Pan Pan must also move 3 spaces down from the throne. Select a position for Pan Pan to land.

STINKOMAN K: Back to where I was, I guess.

Turn 3

JOSHUA: I move slowsky up. Your turn now, Freldman.

FRELDMAN?: I'll move THR up and pray that I get a two or higher.

JOSHUA: It's not your lucky day (...or is it?). You roll a one.

FRELDMAN?: I guess I'll attack Dangeresque Too.

JOSHUA: You have an elemental advantage. Do you want to give him +2 defense, attack, or speed?

FRELDMAN?: Defense!

Wrestling Time

versus

Strange has an elemental advantage over Cool. Freldman? chooses +2 defence.

The Homestar Runner has a higher speed stat. Therefore, he attacks first.

• The Homestar Runner attacks Dangeresque Too!
  • 4 = 4
  • Dangeresque Too's defence is critical!
  • Dangeresque Too's defence is lowered to 3.
• Dangeresque Too attacks The Homestar Runner!
  • 5 > 4
  • The Homestar Runner is defeated!

JOSHUA: Oooooh. I think this the first time in the history of this game a card with an elemental advantage lost a wrestle. Tough luck, you fall all the way back into the far corner, while my guy moves up another space. The funny thing is you would have won the wrestle if you picked +2 attack. Go, go, Supa Sam!

SUPER SAM: You're evil. >.> Let's see if I can poke 1-Up to the top!

CLAMBURGER: {boop} 3.

SUPER SAM: Yay! Thank you, purely-random-and-not-just-pseudo-random-numbers!

CLAMBURGER: 1 point awarded to Super Sam. Stinkoman K, you may choose to draw a random card or move Pan Pan or Cheatball.

STINKOMAN K: I'm moving Pan Pan.

JOSHUA: Rolls a three, yo.

STINKOMAN K: Far right on the top row.

CLAMBURGER: Pan Pan placed. End turn.

Turn 2

JOSHUA: I choose to draw a new card, Super Sam!

CLAMBURGER: Incorrect salutation. Card drawn is The Poopsmith. You cannot select a position for placement until Stinkoman K choose a position for Pan Pan, at which point you will automatically get the other available space.

JOSHUA: Which will be Dangeresque Too, you is also in my hand.

{There is a pause. Crickets chirp or something.}

JOSHUA: And now he goes in Super Sam's row. His stats are... {randomating the countryside} 5 attack, 4 defense, and 1 speed. Okay, that's... interesting.

CLAMBURGER: Freldman?, it is now your move.

FRELDMAN?: Sorry I didn't go sooner. Uh... I'll move The Homestar Runner again.

JOSHUA: You roll a two, Freldman. Move him up!

FRELDMAN?: Right behind 1-Up.

SUPER SAM: Go up, I say! Up!

CLAMBURGER: Your purely random number is 1. Order of players rotates to Stinkoman K.

STINKOMAN K: I'll move Pan Pan up.

JOSHUA: You roll a three. Where to?

STINKOMAN K: Two spaces above Cheatball.

JOSHUA: Done.

Turn 1

JOSHUA: And now I guess I move Perducci... {rolls a three} Up he goes! Over to you, Freldman.

FRELDMAN?: I'll move The Homestar Runner.

MARKIE: Joining in to roll a die! {rolls 2} Okay, now go somewhere.

FRELDMAN?: I'll go straight up.

CLAMBURGER: moves := random(3)+1; showMessage("moves = "+moves); // moves = 3

SUPER SAM: I choose to attack The Homestar Runner!

Wrestling Time

versus

No elemental advantages.

The Homestar Runner has a higher speed stat. Therefore, he attacks first.

• The Homestar Runner attacks 1-Up!
  • 4 < 5
  • 1-Up's defence is lowered to 4.
• 1-Up attacks The Homestar Runner!
  • 2 = 2
  • The Homestar Runner's defence is critical!
  • The Homestar Runner's defence is lowered to 1.
• The Homestar Runner attacks 1-Up!
  • 4 = 4
  • 1-Up's defence is critical!
  • 1-Up's defence is lowered to 3.
• 1-Up attacks The Homestar Runner!
  • 2 > 1
  • The Homestar Runner is defeated!

SUPER SAM: Woot?! Another space up, I s'pose.

CLAMBURGER: Message to Freldman?: The Homestar Runner has a speed of 4, and since there is no valid spot 4 spaces done, you have been moved 3 spaces to the bottom left. Stinkoman K, you may proceed.

STINKOMAN K: I'll draw another card.

CLAMBURGER: You have drawn Pan Pan. Selecting Wildcard stats... Attack: 3; Defence: 1; Speed: 6. Select a position to place Pan Pan.

STINKOMAN K: I'll place Pan Pan next to Cheatball.

JOSHUA: Five-two-three!

Setup Process

CLAMBURGER: Loading players into slots 1 to 4...

CLAMBURGER: Loading process complete. Randomly selecting cards from players' decks.

• Stinkoman K draws a Cheatball card. (Speed: 3)
• Joshua draws a Dangeresque Too card. (Wildcard)
• Super Sam draws a 1-Up card. (Speed: 3)
• Freldman? draws a The Homestar Runner card. (Speed: 4)

CLAMBURGER: Syntax error. Re-drawing Joshua's wildcard...

• Joshua draws a Perducci card. (Speed: 4)

CLAMBURGER: Speed conflict - flipping virtual coin for 4 speed. Joshua wins first coin toss: flipping again for 3 speed. Super Sam wins. Order of turns is as follows: Joshua, Freldman?, Super Sam and Stinkoman K. Joshua, you may proceed in selecting a space for your card to be positioned.

JOSHUA: I'll put Perducci on the right row, on the closer side. Alright Freldman, place yours down.

FRELDMAN?: Right column on the left side. Now it's Super Sam's turn.

SUPER SAM: Next to Freldman?. Onto you, Stinkoman K!

STINKOMAN K: Where else can I put it? I'll go on the far right.