Cheerleadermailz/hobbies

From Homestar Runner Fanstuff Wiki

Cheerleader’s former stalker sends her an e-mail asking about her hobbies. So and So fires lasers.

Cast (in order of appearance): Cheerleader, So and So, The Wheelchair (Easter egg), Eh! Steve (Easter egg), The Worm (Easter egg)

Places: Cheerleader’s Room, Library

Computer: BoyToy 2010

Date: May 7, 2010

Page Title: Sponsored by the LAOAAEAATFUBAFISBOL!

Transcript

CHEERLEADER: {singing} Believe it or not, I’m checking emails, I never thought it would be so free-hee-hee!

Dear Chairman Leader,
There's more to life than boys. Why not look into philosophy, or... yoga?
Sincerely yours,
That dumb Wheelchair kid

{Cheerleader sighs after reading “Chairman Leader”. She then reads “That dumb Wheelchair kid” with extreme bewilderment.}

CHEERLEADER: {flabbergasted} Wubba…huzza…ah, crap, not you again! I thought I got rid of you last semester! Where’s Steven, you twit?! Gimme back mah Steven! {clears screen} Whatcha talkin’ ‘bout, Phyllis? I have other hobbies than just chasing boys. There’s seeking boys, and stalking boys, and hunting boys, and…err…um…

{So and So suddenly from behind the screen.}

SO AND SO: Yeah, your life’s meaningless.

CHEERLEADER: How did you…wait, don’t tell me. The window, right?

SO AND SO: You mean the giant hole in the side of your room?

CHEERRLEADER: Meh.

SO AND SO: Anyways, I heard ‘bout your predicament, and as the smart one of the group, I shall help you with your hobbies…and stuff.

CHEERLEADER: Eh, I don’t need you! I got this stuff down!

SO AND SO: Philosophy? Yoga?

CHEERLEADER: I follow the teachings of Paris Hilton! And I exercise cell phone texting daily!

SO AND SO: {annoyed} How about reading?

CHEERLEADER: Magazines?

SO AND SO: No, actual books.

{Long silence. Cheerleader has a shocked expression on her face.}

CHEERLEADER: {shocked} Wh…what are you?

{Scene cuts to the library. Cheerleader and So and So are seen standing. Cheerleader has an uncomfortable expression on her face.}

SO AND SO: {excited} If we’re lucky, we can hit the reference section before the debate team comes-

CHEERLEADER: {screaming} I can’t takes this no more! Must…destroy…books!

{Cheerleader suddenly has a bug-eyed look on her face. She takes out a chainsaw just as a sign comes up, saying “This scene was cut out by the LAOAAEAATFUBAFISBOL due to cruelty to the written word. The author is being beaten senseless as we speak.” The scene changes back. All the books are destroyed. Cheerleader is normal, but So and So is not. She is red, has a bug-eyed expression, and her teeth are gritting.}

CHHERLEADER: Welp, my sanity is back. Whaddya say we go snatch some boys?

SO AND SO: IM’MA FIRIN MAH LAZAH!

{So and So shoots Cheerleader in a fashion similar to Shoop da Woop}

{The Paper comes down, saying “Preeowing away, on the winds of my breath! Who could it be? Believe it or not, It’s just me!}

Easter Egg

Click on “Preeowing” to see a scene in “Sweet Cuppin’ Cakes!”, TGS style.

THE WHEELCHAIR: Ha! That’ll show that cheatin’ boy snatcher to mess wit’ The Wheelchair! She ain’t never gonna see Eh! Steve ever again, not while he’s locked in my closet!

EH! STEVE: {off-screen} Eh! Ste-

THE WHEELCHAIR: Shut it!

(The Worm comes on-screen, holding an empty Cold One bottle.}

THE WORM: Hey! Who drink all one colds?!