Browntant Emails/4
From Homestar Runner Fanstuff Wiki
Summary
Browntant Emails #4 - colours
Randall tries out some new paint jobs.
Cast (in order of appearance): Randall, Kolks, Stinkoman, Police Jaro,
Places: Randall's Computer Room, The Idyllic Zone, Tampo Mall,
Transcript
RANDALL: Uhh, hi, Text Support? What's this... "Emma Ill" thing?
KOLKS:{somehow hums in an Indian accent}
RANDALL: Ohh, okay. Thank you! {types in "RJB_Emails.exe"}
subj: BROWNHEY SANDY RANDY,
YOU ARE NO BROWNTANT
YOU NOT BROWN
THATS FALSE ADVERTISING YO
GET BROWN NOW,
A GUY WHO BELIEVES YOU ARE A POSER
{Randall pronounces the entire email in a loud, monotone voice, without punctuation. He replaces "RANDY" with "FRANK", pronounces "THATS" with a soft "TH", and replaces "BELIEVES YOU ARE" with "IS"}
RANDALL: Sweet Zombie Jesus, did Stinkoman write the email?
{zoom out to show that Stinkoman is standing in the room}
STINKOMAN: NOOOOOT THAT I CAN REMEMBER, CHALLENGE-DOG!
RANDALL: I am not a dog! And how do you keep getting into my house?!
STINKOMAN: YOU NEVER LOCK YOUR DOORS! ...GOING AWAY DEUCE! {slowly walks offscreen}
RANDALL: Aaaanyway...
{cut back to the computer screen}
RANDALL:{typing} Well, Poser, I've never really bothered with customizing my chassis. I suppose I could give it a try...
{cut to Randall standing on Kolks and flying through the Idyllic Zone}
RANDALL:{flinging his antenna like a whip} Hyah! Hyah!
KOLKS:{angrily hums, starts swerving around wildly}
RANDALL:{stops flinging his antenna} Aah! Aah! I'm sorry, I'm sorry!
KOLKS:{stops swerving, hums as if saying "THANK you."}
RANDALL: And watch out for the building.
KOLKS:{frightened hum, suddenly slows down, somehow creating a car screech, crashes into a building}
RANDALL: Agh! This keeps happening! Why does this keep happening?
{cut to inside the building. It is apparently a shopping mall. A sign hanging from the ceiling reads "Tampo Mall", and is shaped like a brain. Randall and Kolks slide onscreen}
RANDALL: Now, where is...
{Randall runs into the Police Jaro from "firsties"}
RANDALL: Agh! S-sorry, uh, officer!
POLICE JARO:{squints} Hmm... Do I know you from somewhere?
RANDALL: Eh! N-no, I don't believe so!
POLICE JARO:{leans toward Randall} Hmm... Alri-{falls over} Agh!
{Randall and Kolks run offscreen. Randall does a Zoidberg/Curly Joe "running away noise" impression. Cut to outside a store within the mall with a sign above it reading "Astromundie & Chorch". It apparently sells clothing. Kolks and Randall run onscreen and into it. Cut to inside the store}
