(The Competing Brand) Other Character Email Bubs/2
From Homestar Runner Fanstuff Wiki
{Open: Bubs, printing the email off.}
BUBS: I always prefer to have hard copy. And why shouldn't I? I'm not the one who's paying! Visa is.
{Cut: Visa logo.}
BUBS: {voice-over} With Visa's rewards for small business owners, I can buy all the supplies I need, and still have some left over for fraud! That's why I use the Gold card.
Made of Literal Gold!
{Cut back}
BUBS: Sometimes, I just sit and wait for the printer to print out 8 copies, for no reason! Like now! Oop, it's finished!
Hey, Bubs!
It's me, your old friend Godot, remember? From shady business school?
Well, anyway, I'm gonna be takin' a train over to Free Country, so could you go over to the station to pick me up? Shouldn't take long.
Thanks,
Godot
Hey, Bubs!
It's me, your old friend Godot, remember? From shady business school?
Well, anyway, I'm gonna be takin' a train over to Free Country, so could you go over to the station to pick me up? Shouldn't take long.
Thanks,
Godot
Hey, Bubs!
It's me, your old friend Godot, remember? From shady business school?
Well, anyway, I'm gonna be takin' a train over to Free Country, so could you go over to the station to pick me up? Shouldn't take long.
Thanks,
Godot
Hey, Bubs!
It's me, your old friend Godot, remember? From shady business school?
Well, anyway, I'm gonna be takin' a train over to Free Country, so could you go over to the station to pick me up? Shouldn't take long.
Thanks,
Godot
Hey, Bubs!
It's me, your old friend Godot, remember? From shady business school?
Well, anyway, I'm gonna be takin' a train over to Free Country, so could you go over to the station to pick me up? Shouldn't take long.
Thanks,
Godot
Hey, Bubs!
It's me, your old friend Godot, remember? From shady business school?
Well, anyway, I'm gonna be takin' a train over to Free Country, so could you go over to the station to pick me up? Shouldn't take long.
Thanks,
Godot
Hey, Bubs!
It's me, your old friend Godot, remember? From shady business school?
Well, anyway, I'm gonna be takin' a train over to Free Country, so could you go over to the station to pick me up? Shouldn't take long.
Thanks,
Godot
Hey, Bubs!
It's me, your old friend Godot, remember? From shady business school?
Well, anyway, I'm gonna be takin' a train over to Free Country, so could you go over to the station to pick me up? Shouldn't take long.
Thanks,
Godot
Hey, Bubs!
It's me, your old friend Godot, remember? From shady business school?
Well, anyway, I'm gonna be takin' a train over to Free Country, so could you go over to the station to pick me up? Shouldn't take long.
Thanks,
Godot
BUBS: It's almost like I have eight many fans! And none of them are Coach Z!
{Senor Having-A-Lil-Trouble walks up.}
BUBS: Why, here comes one of those eight fans right now!
{Senor Having-A-Lil-Trouble uselessly flails his arms on the counter, being too short to see over it.}
BUBS: Looks like Senor Having-A-Lil-Trouble is having a little trouble! Hahahaha I THOUGHT I KILLED YOU DEAD.
{Bubs slams the shutter on Senor's arms. Cut around to the other side of the shutter, which is revealed to have "On-Point Kings Turf" spray-painted on it. Senor wheezes and wilts away, then turns into ashes. Strong Bad, in full kings' gear, marches from the right side of the screen to the left, The Cheat and Strong Mad following him.}
STRONG BAD: Onwards! Onwards! Onwards!
STRONG MAD: HENCEFORTH
STRONG BAD: Quarterly!
STRONG MAD: MAGNA CARTA
{Cut: The Strongs' house, now Homestar's. Exterior.}
STRONG BAD: Rapunzel, rapunzel, let down your hair!
STRONG MAD: I WAS ENJOYING THE SHOW
{Homestar opens his window.}
HOMESTAR: Didn't you hear? I'm The Man!
STRONG BAD: Well, then I'm The Guy! And so are all my descendants!
{Cut: 20X6. 1-Up is standing around near Stinkoman.}
1-UP: Hey Stinkoman, can I be The Guy now?
STINKOMAN: Silly 1-Up, you'll always only ever be The Man!
1-UP: I'LL SHOW YOU! I'LL SHOW YOU LIKE NEVER BEFORE!
IT'S THE
{MONTAGE: 1-Up beating up a dead three-eyed fish}
EYE OF THE TIGER IT'S THE
{MONTAGE: 1-Up banging on a podium with a spoon to all who will listen. Only a few stray cats pay attention}
CREAM OF THE FIGHT RISING UP
{MONTAGE: 1-Up walking up some stairs, but falling on his face after taking literally 3 steps.}
PAST THE CHALLENGE OF OUR RIVALS AND THE
{MONTAGE: 1-Up cracks an egg on his head then licks his face.}
LAST KNOWN SURVIVOR STALKS
{MONTAGE: 1-Up, standing on a fountain, giving a speech to a small crowd}
HIS PREY IN THE NIGHT AND HE'S
{MONTAGE: 1-Up spin kicking a bird RIGHT OUT OF THE SKY!}
WATCHING US ALL IN THE EYE
{MONTAGE: 1-Up runs all the way up a staircase, but then falls down the stairs, step by step.}
OF THE TIGER.
{MONTAGE: 1-Up giving a speech to a massive amount of people, with three television screens above his head enlarging his face for those who can't see him in the back row. Cut: Stock footage of Germans cheering for Hitler.}
bass line
{MONTAGE: 1-Up replacing the fountain he was standing on earlier with a statue of himself that spits water.}
{The Poopsmithakuru looks at the camera, shrugs, then continues to shovel poop. Trogador walks by on his cell phone.}
TROGADOR: Yeah, yeah, no, yeah! I'll meet you at the train station, okay? With the money.
{Cut: The train station, where Bubs' skeleton lies. Trogador sits next to the skeleton. Crossfade into the past, where Bubs is in the exact same spot, but alive.}
BUBS: Any minute now...
{Strong Sad (the present-day Trogador, btw) sits on next to Bubs.}
STRONG SAD: Hey Bubs. Why are you here?
BUBS: I'm waiting for a friend.
STRONG SAD: I'm getting out of town. Looks like some people want to remember, and others want to forget.
BUBS: Where are you going?
STRONG SAD: To the big city, where a man can not be free.
{A train pulls into the station.}
STRONG SAD: Well, uh, that's my cue. I wish you luck on that Godot thing.
{Strong Sad gets up and leaves.}
BUBS: Any minute now...
{Establishment Shot: Strong Sad in a train.}
{Cut: Strong Sad getting off the train, at the exact same place he started at.}
STRONG SAD: Bubs? How'd you get here?
BUBS: I've been here since before you left.
STRONG SAD: But that train went in a perfectly straight line!
{Bubs shrugs.}
BUBS: I don't know... or maybe I do. $10 to find out.
{Strong Sad hands $10 to Bubs.}
BUBS: I don't know.
{Strong Sad runs away, screaming.}
{Cut: The Strong's house. "THE ON-POINT KINGS TURF" has been spray-painted on the side.}
AND SO BEGINS THE REIGN OF THE GUYS, ENDING THE RULE OF THE MANS. HOWEVER, WHAT HAPPENS IN 20X6? TUNE IN NEXT TIME TO FIND OUT
