Other Character Email Gunhaver/Instability
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Contents |
Summary
A form of an old enemy/an enemy that never existed comes (back) to have revenge on/fight Gunhaver.
Cast (in order of appearance): Gunhaver, Alpha Stan, Contestro, Mysterious Robed Figure, Tim-Tam-Tom, Silent Rip, Shadow Contestro, JJJ (Easter Egg), BBB (Easter Egg)
Lines: 139
Page Title: Alpha 1260
Transcript
{Cut to Gunhaver in front of the Alpha 1260.}
GUNHAVER: Schooling all of the emails back at home! Homing all of the emails back at school!
Hello Gunhaver. You have 17 emails.
GUNHAVER: Jigga-jigga-jenga-go!
{Gunhaver presses a button to make the following email appear on the screen. He reads it, but stops abruptly after reading "Sincerely,".}
Subject: I'll kill you!Dear The Late Gunhaver,
Shadow Contestro
Did you think you could get rid of your Contestro
problems so easily? HA! They've nearly just begun!
I'm coming to destroy you and my good side! With
you two out of the way along with the Unguraits,
nothing can stop me!
Sincerely,
GUNHAVER: {typing} Look Lucy, who apparently likes the nighttime so freakin' much, let's take a look at how I've offended Contestro and vice versa.
{Cut to a white screen. Montage music plays. Cut back to Gunhaver at the Alpha 1260.}
GUNHAVER: {typing} And THAT shows why Contestro has no reason to be my enemy. Anyway, all interactions between me and the Unguraits are conspiracies created by Steve. Other than that, I'm out of here!
{Gunhaver walks off-screen. Cut to Gunhaver and Contestro in a room.}
GUNHAVER: Hey Contestro. Did you, by any chance, have an evil side?
CONTESTRO: Uh... not that I remember.
GUNHAVER: Well, that confirms everything.
{Cut to a tall, dark, spiky, castle in a large, cyber, multicolored plane with virtual buildings and mountains behind it. Cut to a large, laboratory room inside the castle, where a mysterious robed figure is staring at a blank computer screen.}
ROBED FIGURE: Ahh... yes... the only way...
{The robed figure walks to the right to a capsule. The robed figure pushes a button by the capsule, creating a big, flash of red light. When the light fades, a weak, short, multicolored figure is squatting in the capsule. When the capsule opens, the figure exits the capsule and bows in front of the robed figure.}
WEAK FIGURE: What is my task, master?
ROBED FIGURE: I'm leaving you in charge of my... world... I found out that it can only be continued in the hands of a maniac... Tim-Tam-Tom...
TIM-TAM-TOM: I see, my lord. Just what am I to do?
{The robed figure and Tim-Tam-Tom walk to the computer.}
ROBED FIGURE: You are to stand in front of the computer until your mind connects with its power core. Then, you have control.
TIM-TAM-TOM: You're trusting me with your world? But what if I do something irresponsible, my lord?
ROBED FIGURE: I don't care. I can undo it in an instant. I have ultimate power. {turns away} Besides, I need to be alone to deliver an important message.
TIM-TAM-TOM: To who, my lord?
{Suddenly, Tim-Tam-Tom catches fire. After a few seconds, the fire is out.}
ROBED FIGURE: Don't question my values, you underling. You are only working for me and left alive because of your abilities to connect with my world.
TIM-TAM-TOM: Yes, my lord.
ROBED FIGURE: However, you musn't try to destroy my world. You must know how much I've worked on it.
{The mysterious robed figure walks off-screen. Tim-Tam-Tom looks at the computer screen and closes his eyes. Soon, a purple aura surrounds him.}
TIM-TAM-TOM: Hmm... what shall I do first? Maybe I can have Alpha Stan finish explaining how to destroy that Beta shell thingy.
{Cut to the computer screen, which says the following.}
Make Contestro evil from GEmails 35 - 70
TIM-TAM-TOM: What??? No! That's not what I asked for! Er... must concentrate harder! Must not say in my thoughts, "OBEY MY COMMAND"!
{Pause. A beep eminates from the computer.}
TIM-TAM-TOM: Oh no! This is voice activated! The world is doomed! I must undo my mistakes!
{Cut to the computer screen.}
Allow a reference from another universe to enter the S-S-S4M universe.
{Cut to Tim-Tam-Tom. There is a lengthy pause.}
TIM-TAM-TOM: Uh... just why did master trust me with his world anyway?
{Cut to Gunhaver and Contestro in the Cheat Commandos HQ. Both look angry now.}
CONTESTRO: {angrily} Look, I having an enmity against you and your stupid group some weeks ago doesn't mean that I'm still crazy right now.
GUNHAVER: {angrily} Once a lunatic, always a lunatic!
CONTESTRO: {angrily} You were born an idiot! No matter what, you'll never have a brain because of your oversized ego!
GUNHAVER: Wait, {angrily} are you calling me an idiot???
CONTESTRO: Oh, good job! You get an A+ this quarter!
GUNHAVER: This isn't school!
CONTESTRO: Well, you need to GO to school, seeing that you have never done so in your life.
GUNHAVER: If I hadn't sold our weapons to fCon, I'd shoot you right now!
CONTESTRO: You sold the weapons to fCon because you're STUPID! Not only that, but you're ARROGANT!
{Suddenly, Gunhaver violently moves towards Contestro to attack him. Silent Rip walks onscreen with an afro.}
SILENT RIP: Sir! I found this suspicious looking afro in the basement!
CONTESTRO: That's MY afro!
GUNHAVER: That sucks!
{Suddenly, the afro starts to transform into varoius shapes. Soon, it looks like Contestro, except that it's completely black.}
GUNHAVER: Whoa! Contestro, are you trying out for the cPod advertisements?
CONTESTRO: I'm right over here, you imbicile!
GUNHAVER: Yeah, shut up.
SHADOW CONTESTRO: Ah, at last! I have finally gained access to the S-S-S4M universe...
GUNHAVER: Huh?
SHADOW CONTESTRO: Shut up. And now, the time has finally come for me to kill both {points to Contestro} you and {points to Gunhaver} YOU!
GUNHAVER: Look, that's great and all, but this is not only repetetive, but I obviously can't have a fight with an advantage against you, since we don't have any weapons.
SHADOW CONTESTRO: Sweet.
GUNHAVER: Okay... why don't you just go to the fCon warehouse and fight the crap out of Max E. Dorko? Here... I'll write down the address so you can find the warehouse.
{Gunhaver gets out a piece of paper and writes on it with a pencil. He give the piece of paper to Shadow Contestro, who reads it.}
SHADOW CONTESTRO: Uh... this is the address to the police station.
GUNHAVER: Oh, it is? Even better!
CONTESTRO: This is getting stupid. I'm out of here!
{Contestro walks off-screen. Silent Rip, who's still there, looks around before following Contestro off-screen.}
SHADOW CONTESTRO: All right, so it's just you and me now!
GUNHAVER: You still want that fight? All right, but I get first punch, as always.
SHADOW CONTESTRO: Well, I don't like playing by the rules, so... HYAH!!!!
{Shadow Contestro tackles Gunhaver off-screen. Meanwhile, a large, active volcano suddenly appears where Shadow Contestro was just standing. Suddenly, earthquakes start. Thunderstorms and hurricanes are heard off-screen. Cut to Tim-Tam-Tom on the computer. He is watching the scene on the computer.}
TIM-TAM-TOM: Oh... crap. I don't think the volcano's supposed to be there. {pause} Ah well. It can't get worse from here.
{Cut to a view of the Cheat Commandos HQ, which is completely ruined. In its place is the volcano, which is now spewing lava and smoke. The sky is brownish-black and strong winds and lightning bolts are creating havoc. Cut to Gunhaver and Shadow Contestro fighting near the volcano. Suddenly, an earthquake causes them to stumble. Just as they get up, fiery rocks from the volcano fall at them while the volcano erupts, forcing them to run away from the volcano. Suddenly, rock spires spring from the ground and block the way out.}
GUNHAVER: {panting} Oh crap... YOU SET ME UP!
SHADOW CONTESTRO: Actually, I didn't, but this is just perfect for my plan to execute you!
{Gunhaver and Shadow Contestro continue fighting by punching, tackling, and pushing each other. Suddenly, two rock spires spring from the ground and send Gunhaver and Shadow Contestro flying into the air, screaming. Then, extremely strong hurricane winds blow Gunhaver and Shadow Contestro to the rim of the volcano, where they stand up and face each other, panting.}
SHADOW CONTESTRO: This is where it en... YAHH!!!
{Suddenly, the part of the rim the two are on breaks off and starts to fall into the volcano. However, that part of the wall doesn't completely fall into the lava. The other side of the inner wall of the volcano stops the falling volcano wall. Meanwhile, Gunhaver and Shadow Contestro climb onto the edge facing upwards.}
GUNHAVER: Well... this is unpleasant.
{Suddenly, Shadow Contestro lunges at Gunhaver. However, due to the fact that the "bridge" they're on is slanted and Shadow Contestro is on the lower part of the "bridge", he crashes into the rock before rolling down the wall. Before he falls off of the volcano, an earthquake causes Shadow Contestro to roll into an inner wall. Then Shadow Contestro, screaming, falls into the lava. Cut to Gunhaver watching this from the "bridge".}
GUNHAVER: Wow, that's pretty violent. {excited} Thank goodness 4Wimps didn't touch this moment at all! This'll be like the most popular scene of my entire email show! Maybe the most popular scene ever! I wonder what will spoil this moment. Probably nothing.
{Suddenly, a lightning bolt strikes down from the sky at Gunhaver, frying him into ashes. Cut to Tim-Tam-Tom looking at this on the computer screen.}
TIM-TAM-TOM: No! Gunhaver was not supposed to die!
{Tim-Tam-Tom closes his eyes.}
TIM-TAM-TOM: I'll just fix this on that computer...
ROBED FIGURE: {off-screen} TIM-TAM-TOM!!!! WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY WORLD???
{The mysterious robed figure walks onscreen, smoking.}
ROBED FIGURE: Because of you, I failed to transmit my message! Now I may never have a chance! You've lost your chance!
{Suddenly, Tim-Tam-Tom gets burnt to the floor.}
{Cut to this.}
ONE BIG FIX IN THE UNIVERSE LATER...
{Cut to Gunhaver and Contestro in the room they were in in the Cheat Commandos HQ before the change in the universe.}
GUNHAVER: Hey Contestro. Did you, by any chance, have an evil side?
CONTESTRO: Uh... not that I remember.
GUNHAVER: Well, that confirms everything.
{Alpha Stan appears on a wall.}
Click here to email Gunhaver at GEmail.exe
Easter Eggs
- Click on Contestro to see this:
{Cut to a black screen, which shows the following message.}
The original Easter Egg corresponded with the previous version of this email. Therefore, it might not make a lot of sense.
{Cut to JJJ in a room with a television set. Another Cheat runs into the room with a remote control and an open bottle of Choka-Cola.}
CHEAT: Boss!
JJJ: What, Ben Benny Benjamin?
CHEAT: There's a new GEmail on today! We have to watch it in order to heavily edit it!
JJJ: You're right! Turn the TV on!
{BBB presses the remote control, but the TV doesn't turn on. So, BBB walks closer to the television set. Suddenly, he trips and accidentally spills the soda all over the TV just as he presses "ON" on the remote control, electrifying the television set.}
JJJ: You i-word! You've destroyed our only television set! Now we'll never be able to censor and mutilate television shows until we buy a new one!
BBB: You can always make a moral from this.
JJJ: Good point! {clears throat} Kids, never be seduced by caffeinated drinks.
Fun Facts
- This email is the second version of the email Instability due to plot problems and unwanted appearances. To view the old version, click here.
- Gunhaver references Jenga, a game involving a tower of blocks.
- Shadow Contestro is from The Ungurait Email OUFC and is also a boss in The Unguraits' Getaway 2.
- Gunhaver saying that all interactions between him and The Unguraits are conspiracies created by Steve reference Stealing.
- Contestro losing his evil side references to what happened in Paradox.
- Tim-Tam-Tom was a substitute for Shim-Sham-Sam in Virus Remake.
- Tim-Tam-Tom saying that he's going to make "Alpha Stan finish explaining how to destroy that Beta shell thingy" references HAL 9000.
- The name Choka-Cola is a parody of Coca-Cola.
- Email 35 is when an event that made Contestro form an enmity against the Cheat Commandos occured. Email 70 is when we get a glimpse of a good Contestro.
- The name of the universe (S-S-S4M) came from chabarg.
- Gunhaver selling the Cheat Commandos' weapons to fCon references to fCon.
- cPod references to iPod.
- Gunhaver references the iPod's advertisements, which feature silhouettes of people listening to music on their iPods.
- 4Wimps is a running gag and a parody of 4Kids. 4Wimps is known for censoring Showdown, Rated G, and bomb squad. They also made a message in Present.
- JJJ (John Johnnathon Johnson) is from Rated G.
