Other Character Email The Unguraits/The End
From Homestar Runner Fanstuff Wiki
This is it! The final battle of the plot line!
Cast (In order of appearance): Narrater, The Shadowy Figure, Hypnotized slaves, The Unguraits, Kyle, Contestro, Randy, Trevor, WUSS, Gost, Porchis, Ellerait's Ghost, The Trickster, Chorch Commander, Sidekick Bob, The Trickster 2.0, Cops, Ungurait Pharoah, Harvax XVII, Reporter, Molten Pharoah
Transcript
Part 1 - Doomsday
{Fade in to a black screen. Everything the Narrater says happens.}
NARRATOR: The Shadowy Figure hypnotized millions of people to destroy the Unguraits. However Kyle, Contestro, Randy, and Trevor weren't hypnotized, and are hiding in the Unguraits' house. And now let's get back to the story.
{Cut to the Unguraits' house in the normal dimension. The aforementioned are hiding.}
UNGURAIT #1: Now we have to stop these monsters!
CONTESTRO: Yeah, Foxface is in there!
UNGURAIT #1: She hates you. Get over it. And I was talking about WUSS and the Shadowy Figure. Let's go.
TREVOR: How are we gonna beat them? We have no weapons!
UNGURAIT #1: We have weapons.
TREVOR: Why?
UNGURAIT #1: When you have hundreds of enemies, you realize you need them.
TREVOR: Oh yeah. Guys...it's go time.
{Cut to a weapon room. Trevor get a machine gun. Contestro gets in his RDC robot with Randy. Kyle...uhh...jumps. The Unguraits get a box labeled "The Ultamate Weapon". Cut to the outside where the hypnotized slaves slaves are marching towards the Unguraits' house. The Unguraits and those other guys go outside to attack.}
SHADOWY FIGURE: Those fools, walking right into my army. Slaves...ATTACK!
{The slaves rage to attack the guys. Trevor shoots them with his machine gun, Contestro KOs them with his robot, Kyle...jumps on them, and the Unguraits attack with karate skills. After over half of them are defeated, The Shadowy Figure sends WUSS in to join the fight. The Unguraits open the box and a glowing specter is released as it shoots shadow balls, lasers, and flames. It defeats WUSS. The glow disappears to reveal that it's Gost. He makes them fly into the Shadowy Figure. He is knocked back, screaming.}
UNGURAIT #1: Well, we finally defeated him. Let's go home. {The Unguraits and the other guys leave}
SHADOWY FIGURE: {offscreen} You think you've defeated me. You think you've won. Well, guess what? {get up on screen} You haven't. And you won't.
{Cut to the Unguraits' house.}
UNGURAIT #1: It's about time we defeated those guys. They were starting to annoy me.
SHADOWY FIGURE: {offscreen, echoing voice} Well, the annoying isn't over yet. {WUSS captures them after they shoot them with traquilizer darts.} In fact, it's only started. {laughs evilly. Cut to the WUSS Moon Base. The guys are in chains. They regain conciousness.} Well, it looks like you're awake.
UNGURAIT #1: Wait a minute...we defefeated you!
SHADOWY FIGURE: You only thought that. You only knocked me out. I'm a robot. You can't kill me.
CONTESTRO: If you hate us so much, why didn't you just kill us when you had the chance?
SHADOWY FIGURE: Well, I've got time, so I decided, "Why not make them suffer?"
TREVOR: You're a monster!
SHADOWY FIGURE: Thank you. I try.
UNGURAIT #1: Who are you? Why do you hate us?
SHADOWY FIGURE: That will all be revealed in good time. I've injected a serum that makes you unable to die until midnight, but can still feel pain, so you'll be wishing for death, but death won't come. {WUSS leaves as the Shadowy Figure begins to.}
UNGURAIT #1: Wait! Where are you going?
SHADOWY FIGURE: I'm going to rule the universe, then end it. Meet my Porchis. {Porchis come out and draw closer to the Unguraits and the others.} They love cutting stuff up. I'm gonna leave you guys to get aquainted. {laughs evilly as he walks out}
TREVOR: This is gonna suck.
UNGURAIT #1: We gotta find a way out.
?: I can help.
UNGURAIT #1: Who are you? {gasps}
ELLERAIT'S GHOST: I am Ellerait. Don't you recognizes me, Dad?
TREVOR: Hold it! "Dad"? Youm mean you...
UNGURAIT #1: Yes. Now, less talking, more leaving! {Ellerait unties them and leaves with them.}
TREVOR: So, Ellerait, do you have a boyfriend yet?
ELLERAIT'S GHOST: I wouldn't date you even if I was alive.
TREVOR: Oh right. Ghost are dead.
GOST: They sure are.
TREVOR: When'd you get here?
GOST: I came with her.
TREVOR: Oh. Well, let's get back to Earth so we can defeat the evil Shadowy Figure.
ELLERAIT'S GHOST: Right.
{Cut to the Forretress of Wiki-Tude.}
SHADOWY FIGURE: It's great that you rebuilt this place, Super Sam. Now, {on intercom in a loud, booming voice} Attention hypnotized slaves. I am the Shadowy Figure. I have desatroyed the Unguraits.
UNGURAIT #1: Not so fast.
SHADOWY FIGURE: What? You're still unharmed?
UNGURAIT #1: That's right. Now, tell us who you are before we destroy you.
SHADOWY FIGURE: Fine. I am...{finally comes out of the shadows}
THE TRICKSTER: The Trickster! {laughs evilly as the others gasp}
{As the screen fades to black, his red eyes glow in the black before they disappear.}
Part 2 - Return of the Trickster
{fade in from black}
UNGURAIT #1: You're the Trickster? No wonder you hate us!
THE TRICKSTER: I've hated you a long time. I've been plotting to destroy you ever since you defeated me in email 25.
UNGURAIT #1: Yeah, well guess what? You're gonna lose again!
THE TRICKSTER: We'll see about that! WUSS!! ATTACK!!!
{Battle music begins as WUSS and the Trickster charge towards the guys. Dennis fights Randy, H*R 700 fights Trevor, C.Olimar 788 fights Contestro, Super Sam fights Kyle, and the Trickster fights The Unguraits. Dennis attempts to kick Randy, but he dodges. Randy punches Dennis very quickly and causes him to collapse and become defeated. Trevor get his machine gun to shoot H*R 700, but he becomes invisible, so he just shoots in where he thinks he is. H*R 700 hits him on the back of the head, and Trevor shoots in the direction. H*R 700 then punches him in the stomach. Contesro hits C.Olimar788 in the face, but C.Olimar788 uses his Flaming Fist Attack and hits Contestro in his arm and causes the fur to fall off. Then Contestro gets his RDC robot. He pummels C.Olimar788 to the ground. He then helps Trevor with H*R 700. He shoots water out with the RDC robot's water cannon to reveal H*R 700. Trevor shoots him with his machine gun. Kyle repeatedly jumps on Super Sam's head. Each time he tries to get Kyle off him, Kyle just jumps higher and harder. Eventually, Super Sam gets woozy and falls down. Then...we go to the Trickster and The Unguraits.}
UNGURAIT #1: So it all comes down to this.
THE TRICKSTER: No matter who wins, it's ending here and now.
UNGURAIT #1: Well, we'll end it now then.
THE TRICKSTER: SHUT UP!
{The Trickster runs up and kicks the Unguraits in the stomachs. The Unguraits karate chop the Trickster in the light on his head. The Trickster then fires lasers out of his eyes that stun the Unguraits. He pummels them at an extremely fast pace. They are in the ground.}
UNGURAIT #1: I see you've been training.
THE TRICKSTER: Yes I have. I weanted to be at peak physical condition for you.
{The Unguraits pummel the Trickster next. They overpower him and he gets severely beat up. He attacks them and they attack back. Eventually they end up fighting each other equally matched. Then the whole place starts to fall apart. The others run outside while The Unguraits and the Trickster fight inside the collapsing forretress. It falls down. The Trickster uses a force field to protect himself, but unfortunately, he accidentally saved the Unguraits as well.}
TREVOR: That's it. ATTACK!
{The others attack the Trickster and they overpower him. He is defeated.}
THE TRICKSTER: This can't be. I can't lose.
UNGURAIT #1: You can and did. Now what are we gonna do with you. If we sent you back to the future, you'd just come back.
ELLERAIT'S GHOST: I have an idea. {She floats over and grabs the Trickster.} I'll send him to the past where he can never come back. I'll make him get crushed by a meteor.
TREVOR: But won't you get destroyed too?
ELLERAIT'S GHOST: Don't worry, Trevor. I'll be back soon. I just have to make sure the Trickster never comes back. {a portal to the past opens} Goodbye. {Goes into the portal. Cut to the inside of the portal.}
THE TRICKSTER: Let go of me!
ELLERAIT'S GHOST: I can't let you harm anyone ever again. {Cut to a large jungle}
THE TRICKSTER: Where are we?
ELLERAIT'S GHOST: Look up.
{The Trickster looks up to see a large meteor headed straight for them.}
THE TRICKSTER: AHHHH!!! {starts panicking, trying to break free} NO! NO! NOOO!! You can' do this! LET ME GO! LET ME GO! LET ME GO! {The meteor creates a large, white flash. As he disitigrates, he starts panicking even more until he is no more. Pan out to see the Chorch Commander and Sidekick Bob watching.}
CHORCH COMMANDER: I knew it. It's a good thing I put that tracking device on him. Sidekick Bob, get the Trickster 2.0. {Sidekick Bob leaves and comes back with the Trickster 2.0, who looks exactly like the original.}
THE TRICKSTER 2.0: Hey guys. What's up?
CHORCH COMMMANDER: Nothing much.
{Cut back to the present}
UNGURAIT #1: We finally did it! We won! Let's celebrate! {Everyone leaves. WUSS leaves with the cops. Pan over to a dark alley. The Ungurait Pharoah (who is now a mummy) is there.}
UNGURAIT PHAROAH: Enjoy it while you can. For you still have to deal with me. {laughs maniacly}
{fade to black}
Part 3 - Show me the Mummy
{fade in from black}'
UNGURAIT #1: We finally beat them!
KYLE: Yeah! And it was the Trickster the entire time!
UNGURAIT #1: I think this calls for an email!
Dear Jawas, You have won 20 million bucks! Come on down to NOT Harvax Lane, Level 9, and we'll NOT kill you but give you your prize. Sincerely, Harvax XVII
UNGURAIT #1: {typing} Well Harvax XVII, we'd be happy to get our prize! {not typing} Wow! First we win the battle, now this! We rule! {they leave}
{Cut to NOT Harvax Lane, Level 9.}
UNGURAIT #1: Where's our prize?
HARVAX XVII: Here it is! {grabs the Unguraits and puts his gun against their heads}
UNGURAIT #1: I thought you weren't gonna kill us!
HARVAX XVII: You're so gullible! Did you actually think I was gonna give you 20 million bucks? I'm just doing what the pharoah told me to do.
UNGURAIT #1: The pharoah?
HARVAX XVII: The Ungurait Pharoah told me to lure you away from the others while he takes over. He knows that you're friends can't defeat him on their own.
UNGURAIT #1: OH NO! We gotta--
HARVAX XVII: You don't gotta. I'm the one with the gun and if you move one inch, I'm gonna shoot.
UNGURAIT #1: Oh no.
{Cut to the Unguraits' house.}
TREVOR: Hey Gost, go get some sodas.
GOST: Okay.
{There is a crash.}
CONTESTRO: Who are you?
UNGURAIT PHAROAH: I am the Ungurait Pharoah and this...{pan out} is my Ungusphinx.
TREVOR: Oh crap.
{The Ungurait Pharoah atacks with his Ungusphinx. The others attempt to fight back, but can't even dent the Ungushpinx. It swipes them across the room and breaks up Kyle, Contestro is pummeled to the ground, Trevor is decapiteted, and Randy is killed. The house is set to flames as the Ungurait Pharoah laughs maniacly. He leaves. Gost comes back in.}
GOST: Hey guys I got the-- {gasps} I can't believe it. I gotta go tell the Unguraits. {leaves}
{Cut to NOT Harvax Lane, Level 9.}
HARVAX XVII: You know what? I'm gonna kill you anyway.
GOST: {offscreen} No you aren't! {shoots lasers at Harvax XVII and knocks him out}
UNGURAIT #1: Thanks, Gost.
GOST: No problem, but we have bigger problems. Come with me.
{They leave. Cut to the Unguraits...pile of ash.}
UNGURAIT #1: Why did you bring us to this pile of ash?
GOST: That's no ordinary pile of ash. This is your house. The Ungurait Pharoah came and destroyed it, along with the others.
UNGURAIT #1: Oh no...you mean Kyle...{Gost nods his head.} and Contestro... {Gost nods his head.} and the others...{Gost nods his head} Oh no! This can't be happening! This is all a dream!
GOST: I hate to say it, but this is no dream.
UNGURAIT #1: {starts crying} NOOOO!!! Our friends! They're...gone! {starts bawling}
GOST: I know! Let's go defeat the Ungurait Pharoah!
UNGURAIT #1: Good idea!
{Cut to the New Forretress of Wiki-Tude Pharoah-ness.}
UNGURAIT #1: Here's the plan: We go in and desract him while you go inside the robot and destroy it. Then we kick his butt.
GOST: Right.
{They go inside.}
UNGURAIT PHAROAH: Who goes there?
UNGURAIT #1: We go there, Homewrecker.
UNGURAIT PHAROAH: Oh, it's you. I've been waiting to destroy you for 50,000 years. Now I can waste you right here.
{The place turns into a high lava arena.}
UNGURAIT #1: The arena is new.
UNGURAIT PHAROAH: You like it? I just installed it. Now PREPARE TO DIE!
{The Ungusphinx attacks the Unguraits. The Unguraits dodge every hit. Then the Unguphinx swipes them into the floor. It is about to shoot them with several dozen lasers, when it powers down.}
UNGURAIT PHAROAH: What's happening?
GOST: You're about to lose.
{The Unguraits climb onto the Ungusphinx.}
UNGURAIT PHAROAH: Hey, guys. I didn't really mean all that mean stuff I said. We can talk about this.
{The Unguraits pummel him for 8 seconds and it stops when the Ungurait Pharoah is smashed against the wall and falls into the lava.}
UNGURAIT #1: We won! {sadly} But that won't bring back our friends...
GOST: Well, actually it can. I'm not normally supposed to do this, but I can revive them.
'UNGURAIT #1: Then what are you waiting for? DO IT!
GOST: Okay. {a powerful aura appears and travels out the door. Cut to the Unguraits' house. Kyle, Contestro, Trevor, and Randy are revived and are back to normal.}
UNGURAIT #1: Guys! You're back!
TREVOR: Yep.
UNGURAIT #1: Let's go home. {Trevor, Contestro, and Randy leave.} What are we supposed to do about our house?
GOST: Can't help you there. {leaves}
{Cut back to the Forretress of Wiki-Tude Pharoah-ness. A molten arm comes out of the lave as the Ungurait Pharoah laughs maniacly}
{Fade to black.}
Part 4 - Molten Pharoah
{Fade in from black.}
UNGURAIT #1: Well, we lost our house, the Steely 801, and any chance to repair them. What else is there left to lose?
KYLE: That's a good question. And for all good questions, we turn to TV for the answer
{Pan out to see a conviniently placed TV. Kyle turns it on.}
REPORTER: {on TV} WARNING! This is an emergency news broadcast! A lava man is rampaging across the city of Free Country USA! We strongly urge you to evacuate the city! They're invading! AHHH! {falls down. The TV turns off.}
UNGURAIT #1: Oh. We lost any chance for privacy. {sigh} Let's go get the others.
{Cut to Downtown Free Country, USA.}
UNGURAIT #1: Not so fast...Ungurait..Pharoah?
MOLTEN PHAROAH: Surprised to see me? I won't rest until you're dead! And one more thing; I am no longer the Ungurait Pharoah. I am now the MOLTEN PHAROAH! {laughs maniacly}
TREVOR: More like Ooze Pharoah.
CONTESTRO: Or Too-Hideous-To-Look-At Pharoah.
KYLE: Or Gross Pharoah.
{The Molten Pharoah shoots lava at them as they hit the matal wall of the Capital Building.}
MOLTEN PHAROAH: SILENCE! I am the almighty lava that melts the ice caps. I am also Master of Evil! And Master of all burning liquid!
RANDY: Master of Long-winded Introductions.
MOLTEN PHAROAH: ...SHUT UP! Now...to destroy you two.
GOST: Us? You must have us confused with someone else.
MOLTEN PHAROAH: No I don't. You caused me to become a mass of dangerous lava energy. And for that I thank you, but I still hate you and you still have to prepare for a fight.
UNGURAIT #1: We know.
{Intense battle music begins. Th Molten Pharoah shoots lava at the Unguraits and Gost as they run on the walls, dodging every shot. They fly over to ram the Molten Pharoah, but smack into fiery hot lava and quickly pull out of it. They find a fire hydrant and unscrew the top screw. They fire it at the Molten Pharoah. He didges it with all his energy. After over 20 shots, one barely hits him and he is severely damaged. They then find out that the Molten Pharoah is helpless against water. Thay continue to shoot him but the Molten Pharoah shoots them with lava. They try to break free, but can't. Gost saves them. They head for the others. The lava is starting to reach ther skin when they save them.}
TREVOR: Took you long enough.
UNGURAIT #1: Sorry. Now...let's rock.
MOLTEN PHAROAH: You still can't defeat me.
{They attack him with hydrants, hoses, and anything else they can find with water in it. They weaken the Molten Pharoah until he is finally unale to control his liquid form. He flails around, trying to control hisa liquid form. He is panicking, making sick gurgling and sucking noises. After a while, he turns into a lava tsunami. The guys run away from it.}
MOLTEN PHAROAH: {gurgling} Come back here!
CONTESTRO: We have to defend ourselves.
GOST: I can only do this one more time, and I'll disappear forever, but I'll feel good that I saved you guys and Earth itself. I can spin back time so this horrible plotline never happened. You guys will remember it, but noone else will. Everyone form a circle.
{They get in a circle. They spin at a very fast pace and eventually disappear.}
MOLTEN PHAROAH: {gurgling} What? NO!
{Cut to a time stream. All the events that happened in emails 50-28 happen backwards. After it stops, the Unguraits are in front of the Steely 801.}
UNGURAIT #1: What happened? Huh?
GOST: {starts to disappear} I told you. I turned back time. Now I hae to disappear...forever.
UNGURAIT #1: But...you can't.
GOST: I'm soory, but once I do two big favors for one person, or in your case, for people, I deappear forever. Well...Goodbye. {disappears}
UNGURAIT #1: NOO! GOST! Wait. What's this?
Hey The Unguraits, I hear that you make a wickedly delicious "Iced Cream". Would you be able to tell me the recipie, so I can make it myself? Not sending you hate mail, Super Sam
UNGURAIT #1: Wow! We got a second chance! We can make it so they never formed WUSS, and the Trickster never came back for revenge! {typing} Well, the secret recipie is...all Ice cream flavors in one bowl along with...chocolate syrup and...apple juice. That's it. {not tying} Well...we did it! We finally beat them! WUSS, The Trickster, and the Ungurait Pharoah! Yeah!
{Cut to Super Sam's kitchen. He is mixing all the ingredients in the email the Unguraits sent to him. He tastes it.}
SUPER SAM: All right! That tastes great!
{Fade to black}
{Credits}
Fun Facts
- Part one continues from Lazy
- The Trickster being destroyed by a meteor was foretold in Mysterious Past.
- As was the Ungushinx's creation in DSP.
- Also, on an ironic note, H*R 700 became inactive soon after the creation of this email.
