Other Character Email Saargtsson/TV

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Contents

Overview

Saargtsson E-mail 8 - TV

Summary - Saargtsson tries to figure out what TV stands for and Fiery-Hot travels to an alternate dimension.

Cast (in order of appearance) - Saargtsson, Stinkoman, Taco Vultures, Fiery-Hot, Glitched The Cheats, Glitched Marzipan, Turtle Vikings, Talking Viper, Chorch, Foxface (easter egg)

Page Title - Fiery 3X6, Guys

Transcript

SAARGTSSON: {singing} Shake it up, shake it down, shake that e-mail all around!

{He pulls up the e-mail and reads it word-for-word, just like always}

Daer Sargtson,
Do you like to watch TV? And what's
up with Tampo, Brody, and Stlunko?

SAARGTSSON: TV? What's that supposed to stand for? Eh, I suppose I'll just give them an answer for every possible thing it could mean. Um... Taco Vulture?

{Cut to an in-game view with 20X6 sprites. The background greatly resembles that of the Levels 1.1 and 1.2. A Stinkoman sprite walks up to the middle of the screen.}

SAARGTSSON VOICE OVER: Well, I guess it's kind of fun to watch Taco Vultures attacking Stinkoman, but after a while it gets kind of boring.

{A Taco with wings flies up to Stinkoman and starts bumping into him.}

STINKOMAN: {subtitled} Waaah! I doesn't like this TV!

{About five more flying tacos start bumping into Stinkoman}

STINKOMAN: {subtitled} Oh no, a buffet!

SAARGTSSON VOICE OVER: They barely even hurt the guy, he freaks out if a single Jaro comes up to him.

{Stinkoman begins to use his classic Double Deuce attack, but the camera cuts back to Saargtsson's computer before he can finish it.}

SAARGTSSON: Okay, um, how about... Tortan Vomit. No, those are pretty boring, too. All Tortans do is sit there and drip. {Dripping is heard.} And drip. {The dripping gets louder.} And drip. {The dripping continues until Saargtsson screams.} I CAN'T STAND WATCHING THOSE! It's like some kind of Chinese torture chamber or something, AAAAAARGH! Okay, so anyway... what else could that stand for... um... Time Vortex? Hm, I've never actually seen one of those before. I could always just ask Fiery-Hot about it, he knows a lot about random stuff like that.

{Saargtsson gets up. Cut to Fiery-Hot's secretary's desk, where Fiery-Hot is talking on the phone as Saargtsson walks in.}

FIERY-HOT: FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, THIS AN OFFICE BUILDING, WE DON'T HAVE A FREAKING REFRIGERATOR!!! {he hangs up with so much force that he knocks the phone off the desk.}

SAARGTSSON: Okay. Um... Fiery-Hot, do you know anything about Time Votrexes?

FIERY-HOT: Why do you want to know about those?

SAARGTSSON: Some person who doesn't have a name asked me if I like to watch them.

FIERY-HOT: Well, they're folds in the fabric of time that lead to reality getting extremely messed up. I've got one in the closet if you want to see it...

SAARGTSSON: Sure, okay.

{Fiery-Hot leads him down a corridor and up to a regular wooden door labeled "Th'Vortex, People."}

FIERY-HOT: Here it is.

{He opens the door. The closet is empty except for a big, blue swirling hole floating in the middle of it.}

SAARGTSSON: Ooooh, it's PRETTY!

FIERY-HOT: Yeah, don't get too close, though, because it-

{He gets cut off as the vortex sucks him up.}

SAARGTSSON: Uh-oh... this isn't good...

{He closes the door and runs away screaming. Cut back to Saargtsson's computer, where Saartgtsson is sitting again.}

SAARGTSSON: So, um, Time Vortexes are cool to look at until they suck up your best friend into an alternate reality. Especially since that person is the only one who had any clue how time vortexes work. I'm sure he'll pop back eventually... I hope. I wonder where he is now?

{Cut to a 1936 background with a bunch of full-color The Cheats with various body parts replaced with things like lobster claws or bubble wands. The sky flashes colors as the scene goes on. Marzipan is also running around with the The Cheats, but her head has been replaced with Homsar's.}

FIERY-HOT: SAARGTSSON, I AM GOING TO MURDER YOU!!!

{Cut back to Saargtsson's computer.}

SAARGTSSON: Anyway, what else could you have meant to say... um... how about Turtle Vikings? Ugh, I can't stand those things ever since they made me be their figurehead.

{Cut to an ocean scene where a large ship is bobbing up and down in the waves. A bunch of turtles with spiked helmets are manning the oars while another one is banging on a large drum in time with the oarsmen. The camera zooms in and we can see Saargtsson wrapped around the bough of the ship, also wearing a spiked helmet. As the ship's front bobs downwards, Saargtsson is forced underwater. When he comes back up, he has seaweed under his helmet and two shells on his front, so that he looks like a mermaid. Cut back to Saargtsson's computer.}

SAARGTSSON: Definitely a time I would rather forget. Then there's Talking Vipers... man, those guys never shut up!

{A snake walks into the room, talking at a very fast pace at the same time. It continues to talk as Saargtsson gets up and tosses it out the closest window.}

TALKING VIPER: Oh,hey,that'swhereyougotto, Iwasn'tsureisitpossiblethatyou'reavoidingme? Ican'tunderstandwhyI'maniceguyatleastIthinksoandIthinkIthinkright, afterallIammenooneknowsmebetterthanme, soanywaywhatwerewetalkinigabout? Ohyeah,wereallyneedtogettogethermoreoften, it'sfuntojustsithereandrapnotlikethemusickindthetalkingkind...

{Saargtsson sits back down.}

SAARGTSSON: Ugh, I thought I lost him when he followed me off that cliff. Finally, there's the misery that is the Tickling Virus. It makes you giggle uncontrollably until you get rid of it by tickling someone else. I guess it's kind of funny to watch someone else that has it, like when Chorch got it this one time, but it got really annoying after a while.

{Cut to Saargtsson's living room, where Chorch is lying on a couch laughing uncontrollably.}

SAARGTSSON: Hehheh, that's right, suffer.

{Chorch lifts a hand and pokes Saargtsson with it, who immediately starts laughing.}

CHORCH: How do YOU like it?!

{Saargtsson pokes Chorch with his tail. Now Chorch is laughing on the floor again. The two continue to trade the virus off back and forth until the camera cuts back to Saargtsson's computer again.}

SAARGTSSON: That wasn't a very fun day, either. So, No-Name, generally, I don't like watching things that TV stands for. They tend to do things like suck up Fiery-Hot and put me on the front of their boats. As for Tampo, Brody, and Stlunko, I couldn't tell you for sure what their deal is. I'm pretty sure they don't like me because they're jealous of my complete awesomeness. ...Come to think of it, they DO have a lot more minions than I do... But I'm better friends with mine! ...But then, theirs actually LISTEN to them... Oh, look what you did NOW, Nameless One, you made me feel bad! {he sniffs and holds back a sob.} If you need me, I'll be eating all the ice cream in a two mile radius and waiting for Fiery-Hot to come back. {He gets up and runs off, actually sobbing now. The paper comes down reading, "Now look what you've done! E-mail Saargtsson to make him feel better, jerk."}

Easter Eggs

  • Click on "Tampo" "Brody" or "Stlunko" at the beginning of the e-mail to see trading cards of the corresponding character.
  • Click on "TV" at the end of the e-mail to see what happened to Fiery-Hot.

{Cut back to the glitched-up 1936 world, where the sky is still flashing colors, but the The Cheats and Marzipan are gone. Instead, Fiery-Hot is talking to Foxface, who isn't glitchy at all.}

FIERY-HOT: So, do you come here often?

{Fiery-Hot suddenly disappears. Cut back to the closet in Fiery-Hot's office. The door open and Fiery-Hot is thrown out.}

FIERY-HOT: Awww, CRAP!

  • Click on "ice cream" to see Saargtsson lying unconscious with at least ten empty ice-cream cartons lying around him. His face is covered in ice cream and he is moaning.
  • Click on "jealous" to see a new form of torture concocted by the Taco Vultures.

{Cut to a dark room where Stinkoman is tied to a chair. A Taco Vulture flies near his head.}

STINKOMAN: What are you going to do to me? Is this some form of a challenge?

{The Taco Vulture flies off screen and the camera pans to reveal it placing a bottle of Tortan on a stool. The bottle starts dripping.}

STINKOMAN: NOOOOOOOOO!!!

Fun Facts

  • TV obviously stands for television, but that's WAY too un-advanced for 20X6, which is why Saargtsson doesn't know anything about it.
    • I know the Shadowy Figure uses one in Stinkoman 20X6 but... uh... shut up.
  • Saargtsson referring to the dripping Tortan being like a Chinese torture chamber refers to a form of Chinese torture in which the victim is tied up and has water drip on them, but they can't scratch themselves or brush it off or anything. Um... how cruel.
  • Fiery-Hot screaming about refrigerators to someone on the other end of the phone is another reference to Chorch's famous prank call, originally seen in lava.
  • If you really want to find out what Tampo, Brody and Stlunko's deal is, check out the Tampo e-mails, 'cause Saargtsson doesn't seem to know, and will probably burst into tears if you ask him again. Jerk.

Links

Retrieved from "http://fanstuff.hrwiki.org/wiki/Other_Character_Email_Saargtsson/TV"