Homsar's Blog/Specials

"System scans say that the sentience cable."

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Homsar's Crazy Blog is hosted by Super Sam.com

The following is sung to the tune of "It's the End of the World as We Know It (And I Feel Fine)". The rest of this line is just here so the box that this is in stretches all the way across the page. Enjoy!

That's great it starts with a Beepy found glued to the see-ill-ing of the kitchen in my house...

Power is running low, stick an eggplant to the wall, please don't break the fourth wall, it puts you in hospit-all
Spitting out typos, here, there, everywhere. Blow the power in the place, put you there if you weren't there
Pumpkin with a fork, go explain all of the names in a family, it's amazing I still have sight
Squeaky sure was coming in a hurry on the same day that I ate... a... wrench.
Room by room I gave a tour, front, and the back. Look at all my stuff! It's... cool...
Uh oh, really caught, it's not a good Flash movie, but it'll do. Run away, save myself.
Free Country USA, go for a walk one day. Coach Z compares everything with a sports play, day and night - right?
The InstaNet is stuck now there's a real, real, bright light, travel-ling in time...

It's the end of my blog as I know it.
It's the end of my blog as I know it.
It's the end of my blog as I know it - I'm moving on.

Exty six, zero hour, Beepy is now without power. Crash and burn, no return, Stinkoman has fallern
Tell the time, don't know how, twenty-seven hours now, every day is the same, except for the Blursday thang

More verses to come!

Playing file NewYearsEve_06.mp3

HOMSAR: Hello, and welcome back to the countdown to 2006 - we're broadcasting live from The Stick, where the annual Fireworks display is about to occur! I'm your host Homsar, and I'm with my co-commentator, Coach Z!
COACH Z: How ya doin', Homsar.
HOMSAR: For all you people who don't know what I'm saying, never fear! Our transmitter here has an automatic Jibberish-To-English translator installed, so you can hear all the latest Homsar action!
COACH Z: Don't forgort the Coach!
HOMSAR: So, the time is currently... 11:43PM, which should be enough time for some more of our special guest interviews! Here we have a guest that's travelled back just over X0 years to be here today, please welcome 1-Up!
KIDSTAR: I want pudding!
COACH Z: Yeah, pording is pretty cormon now-a-days.
KIDSTAR: I came here with Stinkoman! He thought there might be some challenges here, so... hey, why is this saying my name is Kidstar? IT'S 1-UP!
HOMSAR: It's just a little out-of-date with voice recognition. So, how m-
KIDSTAR: MY NAME IS NOT KIDSTAR!
HOMSAR: Lousy... STRONG BAD! GET OVER HERE!
STRONG BAD: {faintly} What?
HOMSAR: WE NEED YOUR ASSISTANCE! YOU SEEM TO BE PRETTY GOOD WITH COMPUT-
STRONG BAD: You don't have to yell, dumpface.
HOMSAR: Oh, you're here. Fix up this subtitler thing so it says his name is 1-Up and not Kidstar.
STRONG BAD: Whatever you say...
COACH Z: We'll be going orfline for a-

DUMPFACE: Is it working?
COACH Z: Yeah, it's orn.
1-UP: Yay! I'm 1-Up! I want pudding!
DUMPFACE: That's great. So, how is 20X6 different from 2005?
COACH Z: Are the ladies attracted to depressing old men in 20X6?
1-UP: Nope! As a matter of fact, less so!
COACH Z: Ohhh...
DUMPFACE: So, what kinds of pudding do you like?
1-UP: I like all kinds of pudding! Chocolate pudding, strawberry pudding, chocolate chip pudding, semi-solid pudding, frozen pudding...
DUMPFACE: Will somebody get him out of here?
1-UP: ...alcoholic pudding, te- hey! Where are you taking me! I want pudding! Waaaah...
DUMPFACE: Thank goodness that's over. Anyway... um... we got six minutes to kill... so, Coach, what's been happening in your life?
COACH Z: Once somebody told me I did a good jorb. Thort was five years ago.
DUMPFACE: Okay. Anything non-depressing that you can tell us?
COACH Z: Well, this was this one time in college, when all the ladies were all up-ons! Those were the gord days - I remember when-
DUMPFACE: I thought I said non-depressing.
COACH Z: Well, that's kind of a broad phrase Homsar.
DUMPFACE: Geez. So... what do you enjoy about your locker room?
COACH Z: To stort of with it has a reallllly cormfortable bench. There's plenty of storage space, easy access to all forms of showers and terlets, and oh! Speaking of terlets, they can be particularly good to store food-
DUMPFACE: I feel like I gotta puke.
COACH Z: Well, while Homsar's out of action, I'll interview this here fellow named Bubs. How are you doing, Bubsy?
BUBS: Get outta my face!
COACH Z: I see. So, how much are you charging porple to view this here Fireworks display?
BUBS: Oh, I don't own it. But if I did, I'd be charging $50 a person! Plus $100 for those with radio equipment!
COACH Z: Oh.
DUMPFACE: Well, this year's been a great year, hasn't it Coach?
COACH Z: Yeah! Well, for everybordy else, I mean, I'm-
DUMPFACE: {quickly} Okay, here comes the second part of our annual New Year's Eve parade, celebrating everything major that happened in 2005.
COACH Z: First up here is the haspital float. It reminds us of that day when the hospital caused a major blackout over half and country.
DUMPFACE: Yeah. That's... really something. Here's the float that commerates when I defeated those ugly guys from 20X6!
COACH Z: Those guys were orgly?
DUMPFACE: Well, one of them was a giant brain. This next float is... wait, what's this float?
STRONG BAD: {faintly} It's celebrating when you disappeared for a week, crapface!
DUMPFACE: I what?
COACH Z: Yeah, those were good days.
BUBS: {on loudspeaker in background} All hail pencil shavings!
COACH Z: Ah, yes. The day when pencil shavings became a major form of accepted currency.
DUMPFACE: Good thing, too. I'm practically broke.
COACH Z: Aw, geez Homsar. You're getting me depressed.
DUMPFACE: What, more then usual? Hey, look, it's the MasterCard float!
COACH Z: One dirty sorck - 5 bucks. One terlet seat - 10 bucks. One soiled-
DUMPFACE: Why did I have to do this with you?
COACH Z: Becorse I won the contest!
DUMPFACE: There was a contest?
COACH Z: Yeah, bort I was the only participant. Nobody else wornted to enter.
DUMPFACE: {shudders}
COACH Z: Here cormes the National Science day float! Lork, Strong Bad's throwing tomatermorts at it!
STRONG BAD: {faintly} Get out of our town!
DUMPFACE: Is he still mad about that mind control thing?
COACH Z: Yeah. Hey, look! The chicken-head float!
DUMPFACE: WHAT? How did that get out?
COACH Z: You dump a lort of useful storf down the drain.
DUMPFACE: Wow. You sicken me. Here comes our next float, The Jlammy Experience float!
COACH Z: I played that game ornce. It was a torphy, but I did it!
DUMPFACE: Why are half of these floats centered around me, anyway?
COACH Z: I guess you're just a perpular guy, Dumpface.
DUMPFACE: Well I... did you just call me Dumpface?
COACH Z: Well it's what it says on this here subtitlor - Dumpface.
DUMPFACE: Gimme that!

HOMSDMPFCER: Well, um... that didn't turn out too well, but it's better then Dumpface.
COACH Z: Because of Homsar's here messing around, we just missed out on the breakfast float. You know, the breakfast that was held at your house.
DUHOMFCSAR: See? Another float related to me!
COACH Z: Well, this next float isn't related to you! It's related to... hmm... I don't know what it's related to! But you're on it!
HODUMMSFR: Oh! It's commerating when I rescued Homeschool!
COACH Z: You rescued who?
DHOMSFFACE: Right, you guys memories were erased. HEY HOMSAR!
UNIVERSAL HEADMASTER HOMSAR: {faintly} How's it going?
HDUMOSFAFSDAR: IT'S GOING GREAT! Always a great guy, that-
COACH Z: And you thert I was weird. Here's the chocolate float - remembering the time some guy stole a whole bunch of chocolate from various porples of this here country.
DUMFHMSARB: Yes... mysterious... well, here comes the last float - commerating the... huge mess of a Decemberween party that was held... at my house.
COACH Z: That'll horpen to ya.
HOMSDUDPDFAR: Okay, the float parade is over, and we're going to countdown the final 60 seconds! 60! 59! 58! Fifty... stupid subtitler! {whack}

COACH Z: Better. Where was I - 12! 11! 10! 9! 8! 7! 6! 5! 4! 3! 2! 1! HAPPY NEW YEAR!
HOMSAR: What a wonderful Fireworks display.
COACH Z: Yes, I agree Coach. Hey... this is saying that I'm Coach! THIS STUPID-

Yeah. At that point I accidentally broke the transmitter. Oh, so I bet you're wondering why I'm releasing this at around 3:00pm on January 1st instead of showing it to you live. Well, there's no such thing as a live blog! Actually, there is, but you know, not like, live live. Alive. Anyway, I couldn't get back to the Rocko because I was being questioned about the transmitter. So, I'm here now, and I decided to post it at this time for the benefit of my different time zoned readers. So, crappy old year, and happy new year!

I bet you've all noticed how many Tampo Email references I've been cramming into my blog entries. So this special will celebrate the fact that I've gone where nobody has ever gone before, and I've referenced Tampo Email 20 times! Let's see what this Experiment Room can do!

• BUTTON 1: Let's me play the full version of Tampo Testings! No more waiting until 20X7, it has at least hours of fun, you get to control NOT Stinkoman, and for all you children types out there, the good news is, it's rated T for Tampo! Wait, who the heck is Tampo?
• BUTTON 4: Opens up a window that lets me e-mail a giant brain! I mean, e-mailing a brain? Who would've thunk it!
• BUTTON 9: Hacks into some guy called Stlunko's no-longer-updated diary. As a matter of fact, only one entry on March 31, 20X6, and it was cut off.
• BUTTON 16: It prints out plans for a robot body. It looks like it has a bunch of security system parts in it, not to mention that Tropical Lazor Beams are mentioned. Man, whoever's gonna use this plan is in for a surprise.
• BUTTON 25: Prints out what appears to be a list of some items that Bubs has. There's some interesting stuff on it, such as $20 pumpkins, a $99 robot body, a blue bomb of $79, and a neutered The Cheat for only $10!
• BUTTON 36: Phones Trevor. Apparently, Booty answered for some raisen.
• BUTTON 49: Generates a box of Chicken Crunch Cubes Cereal. I tried some out, and it was pretty okay.
• BUTTON 64: A screen comes up and plays a kiddy show called "Tampo's Fun Hour". I almost died.

Beepy running Flash, destroy eggplant brain! Catch priveleges, check power surge pudding. Mayor Homeschool, where's platter hat salad? House DVD, kitchen scoop title 4. Red Chort tired, residents listening for tapes! Gut walk to the enemies, marshmellow crazy! Mirror friends box, boring InstaNet. Glowing to 20X6, log in, Stinkoman! Bugging future Jayden, X I 1-Up. Automated factory, Majoresque working live, brain complication, 44 bodies. Supercom complete? Orange buttons panel. AaAaAaAaAaAaAaAaA! End romance, Bubs, wrestling friends, Marzichan. Chicken - drive! Factory Homsar dizzy as radiation to me, Mastercard blog sorta helping vacation. I shall pencil a day for toilet!