PBTC The Cheat Email/expiration

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Contents

PBTC The Cheat Email #58 expiration

Summary

The Cheat sends a letter to people. Weirdness occurs.

Cast(in order of appearance)

The Cheat, Homestar, The Strong Bad, The Sneak, Sickly Sam, The Homestar Runner, Stinkoman, 1-Up, Pan Pan, Marzichan, 20X6 King Of Town, The Man With The Huge Mouth, Stinkoman's Teacher(Easter Egg)

Here We GO!

THE CHEAT: Email. E-m-a-i-l. C-mail. {Types Cheatmail.exe; email pops up}

Dear mister the cheat.
We are sorry to inform you your
pencil shavings have expired.
Dolpins

THE CHEAT: {reading email} Dear your awesomeness, we are sorry to inform you that your pencil shavings have expired? From Dolphin? This can't be my email! {Types FWDtoH*R.exe then enter; cut to Homestar checking his email}

HOMESTAR: Email comes today. {email comes up} 

 Dear Mr. Homestar<br />
We are sorry to inform you your<br />
pencil shavings have expired.<br />
Dolpins

HOMESTAR: {reading email} Dear Monster Homestar. Your pencil shavings are gone. Doll pin. Well, Raggedy Ann, I surrendered my! Money to The Cheat years ago! Watch and see today! {Cut to The Cheat and Homestar in The Field}

HOMESTAR: Here's all my money The Cheat! {Homestar hands The Cheat a pencil sharpener} And while you're at it, take my car! {Homestar hands The Cheat keys. and The Cheat runs offscreen} What a! Guy!

THE CHEAT: {speeds in on a Hummer, running over Homestar} Yay!

HOMESTAR: You are very welcome, nighttime! {Cut back to Homestar at the computer}

HOMESTAR: So there. My pencil excrements expired then. Not now. This is old email. Send! {The email disappears} Off to the pie convention! {Homestar pulls out a sign reading, "Apple!" and walks offscreen. Cut to The Strong Bad at his telegramophone}

THE STRONG BAD: The Sneak! Where's my fan complaint? {The Sneak runs up and hands a letter to The Strong Bad}

THE SNEAK: {wiggles nose}

THE STRONG BAD: Yes. Have a bellboy medal. {The Strong Bad places a medal on The Sneak's nose}

THE SNEAK: {wiggles nose and scurries off}

THE STRONG BAD: {reading letter} Dear The Strong Bad stop. Your currency has stopped stop. Hailing from Dolphins stop.

THE STRONG BAD: I can't be poor. The Depression is over! {The Strong Bad runs over to a closet and opens it, revealing a safe} Did someone intrude my safe's safekeeping? {The Strong Bad opens it, revealing Sickly Sam} What?

SICKLY SAM: I've been in here for 1 score.

THE STRONG BAD: Get out, you undignified slice of weinershnitzel!

SICKLY SAM: Here I go again! {Sickly Sam disappears}

THE STRONG BAD: I can't believe it! I grow poor! {The Homestar Runner walks in, kicking his can}

THE HOMESTAR RUNNER: Why hello. Would you like some N&Ns? {holds out a bag of candy}

THE STRONG BAD: Give me that soda ball!

THE HOMESTAR RUNNER: You mean my can?

THE STRONG BAD: It will make a fair 2 and 1 pennies at the depot!

THE HOMESTAR RUNNER: Well. Okay. {hands The Strong Bad the can}

THE STRONG BAD: Now I can be rich! Gold undergarments will be modeled after mine! The world is mine! Now to rid myself of this dastardly letter! {The Strong Bad buries the letter}

THE HOMESTAR RUNNER: Well, I'm going to go watch Tom And Jerry.

THE STRONG BAD: Wait for me! {They both run off. Cut to Stinkoman eating dirt in the 20X6 The Field}

STINKOMAN: This new brown dirt with green icing is great for eating! {1-Up walks up}

1-UP: Does it taste like pudding? {1-Up tries some} Yum to the power of X! It tastes like my cat! Can I have! More?

STINKOMAN: Wait your turn! The guys have to eat! Maybe when you're older!

1-UP: Man. I bet the ground I'm standing on now doesn't taste as good as yours!

STINKOMAN: {has eaten so much, he is so deep he can't be seen} Whoa!

1-UP: Well what is it?

STINKOMAN: I found a flimsy peice of parchment! I think ancient people called it paper!

1-UP: That name is dumb! Whoever thought of that name must be dumb! Ha, ha, ha, dumb!

PAN PAN: {bounces up} Badaling badaling! {He lands on 1-Up}

STINKOMAN: Ha ha ha! Pan Pan fell on you! You're fat Pan Pan! Go fall on him again!

PAN PAN: Badaling. {Pan Pan bounces up and lands on 1-Up again}

STINKOMAN: You're such a good bear! A fat one, too! Oh, yeah. I got sidetracked! What is this foreign language?

{Stinkoman walks offscreen. Cut to Stinkoman talking to Marzichan at another part of The Field}

STINKOMAN: So, Marzi! Can you decipher this? {Hands her the note}

MARZICHAN: These scribbles are too weird! I wish my dad was here! {The 20X6 King of Town walks up}

20X6 KING OF TOWN: Ho Ho? What do yous wants?

STINKOMAN: Can you decipher this parchment?

20X6 KING OF TOWN: Does decipher means eat?

STINKOMAN: No. I don't think so.

20X6 KING OF TOWN: Can't helps yous. {He walks almost offscreen, then turns around and jumps on Stinkoman} Gimme that parchment! It looks yummy!

STINKOMAN: You must be asking for a challenge! DOUBLE DEUCE!!!!!!!!!! {Stinkoman stands up and gives the 20X^ KOT the double deuce}

20X6 KING OF TOWN: That's nots nice! DOUBLE DEUCE!!!!!! Not so highs and mighty nows!

STINKOMAN: I can't see your double deuce! It's invisible. Like some kinda robot! Marzichan! Your dad is a robot! {Stinkoman punches the 20X6 King Of Town and he turns into ash} There! You've been 20X6'D!

THE MAN WITH THE HUGE MOUTH: That my line! STOLEN LINE'D! {Stinkoman loses his outlines and turns into a puddle}

STINKOMAN: Oh no! I've chemically changed!

THE MAN WITH THE HUGE MOUTH: HEAT'D! {The sun comes out and Stinkoman turns into vapors}

STINKOMAN: Oh no! Evaporation!

THE MAN WITH THE HUGE MOUTH: WATER CYCLE'D! {Stinkoman turns into rain and splatters all over the ground}

STINKOMAN: I don't like precipitation!

{Cut back to The Cheat at his computer}

THE CHEAT: Well, this email sucked. All I did was F-W-D it! {voice changes into Stinkoman's} Maybe the next one will be better!

{The Printer falls, ejecting a CD reeading, "The Water Cycle"}

Easter Eggs

  • Click the CD to see how Stinkoman learned about the water cycle.

Transcript

{Cu to Stinkoman in a classroom}

TEACHER: Here's your water cycle test. {Stinkoman receives his test back. There's a big A- on it}

STINKOMAN: But, why an A-?

TEACHER: You missed a question.

STINKOMAN: Are you asking for a challenge?


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