Other Character Email Nebulon/ally

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Contents

Summary

Nebulon Email #5: "ally"

Nebulon attempts to recruit an ally to fight Tampo with, but is turned down multiple times.

Date: July 17, 2005

Cast: Nebulon, Charles, Stone Jaro, Stlunko, Tampo, Firey-Hot

Places: Nebulon's Base, Tampo's Base Outskirts, Stlunko's Room, Saargsson's Base

Length: 101 Lines

Transcript

{Show Nebulon and Charles in front of the Neby.}

NEBULON: You know, that Megaxe...

CHARLES: No. You only like him because he is a, as you may call him, a brownoser.

NEBULON: But he'd be great at the email show!

CHARLES: I highly doubt that "Yes, sir, Master, that email WAS the worst one you have ever recieved" will raise our popularity. Besides, we are already bordering Tampo's anger with two people answering an email.

NEBULON: Just for one email!

CHARLES: Fine. For our next email, that fool can answer an email.

NEBULON: Your generosity is overwhelming. Well, email, demail...

{He reads the email out loud.}

NEBULON: {reads "Sayo-Sham-Sam" as "So-Stupid-Sam"} Well, stupid, don't you feel ashamed of your ancestor, yourself? He was just so stupid! Oh, wait, you already are.

CHARLES: As much as I dislike this idiot here, you might have actually read his emails before creating an email so stupid.

NEBULON: Is this a disguised challenge request? I had them blocked ever sice I lost to 1-Up, but I'll be willing to destroy you and challenge cities again.

CHARLES: I will check the house's owner's logs dealing with "Sayo-Shim-Sam".

NEBULON: You've been soft since you were beaten up a few days ago.

CHARLES: Do not count on it. We do have one match, but...

NEBULON: You're not secretive, and if you're trying to be, it's not working.

CHARLES: Stlunko does not show up in these logs.

NEBULON: So?

CHARLES: Think about it. I doubt any renegade would attack all leaders besides one.

NEBULON: Stlunko wouldn't attack Tampo, though. He's too loyal.

CHARLES: Once again, you prove your idiocy. All robots created my our current leader have a memory chip that can be wiped.

NEBULON: Why don't we go talk to Stlunko instead of listening to you spurt conspiracy theories?

CHARLES: You want to enter Tampo's fortress?

NEBULON: To talk to Stlunko.

CHARLES: Fine. Enjoy death.

{Cut to the outside of Tampo's warehouse. Nebulon begins to walk in.}

CHARLES: If you're going to kill ourself, can you not do it so openly? I doubt Tampo would have an unguarded front door.

NEBULON: So how do we get in?

CHARLES: We could use the air vents, but that is too overdone. Not to mention they are 100 feet in the air and have a buzzsw in them.

NEBULON: You didn't answer my question...

CHARLES: Did you somehow think I did not have a way to get in? There is a back enterance for late missions. Being a former colleage, I have the code.

{Cut to the back.}

STONE JARO: SPEAK THE PASSWORD.

CHARLES: I love the Master.

STONE JARO: ACCEPTED. IS THIS STINKOMAN WITH YOU?

NEBULON: Do I look like Stinkoman?

STONE JARO: I HAVE STONE EYES. YOU TRY LOOKING WITH THEM. AND HELLO, NEB-1. SECURITY HAS BEEN ALERTED!

{Nevertheless, the door lets Nebulon pass through.}

NEBULON: He called me NEB-1... I can't believe him.

CHARLES: Well, now you get to stop talking for once, which may actually be a record. Stlunko is right down this hallway.

{A door opens to reveal Stlunko.}

CHARLES: Hello, again, Master.

STLUNKO: We had you cast out, Prototype 002 Chorch.

CHARLES: Yes, Master, but...

STLUNKO: And you brought NEB-1? I am hoping this action was meant so he would be turned in.

CHARLES: Well, actually, Master Stlunko...

STLUNKO: I hope Tampo will grant me the pleasure of disposing of him for a second time...

NEBULON: Actually, it seems like third...

STLUNKO: {small hesitation} How did you--

NEBULON: Most people don't their logs in plain sight.

STLUNKO: I--

{The door bursts open.}

TAMPO: Stlunko! You managed to capture the fugitive and the informant that refused to inform me?

NEBULON: Informant?

TAMPO: I tire of your idiocy. You know who I mean, and faked idiocy for effect isn't exactly what I call "charming".

STLUNKO: These wanted beings burst in here together.

TAMPO: Ah, yes, the friendship that builds. Well, Prototype 002, you are the worst spy ever. You told useless information. I want to know what he's plotting, not the wonderful time you used your wit while answering an email. So, you get a choice. You can kill NEB-1 now, or you can die.

CHARLES: I will take the third choice.

TAMPO: {laughs} What's that? Making your little friend kill himself?

{Charles jams his arm into Tampo.}

CHARLES: Something like that.

{He motions for Nebulon to follow him. He rushes through the door Tampo came through, and eventually ends up jumping out a window.}

NEBULON: So, in recap, you just assaulted your old master, who sent you to spy on me?

CHARLES: Do not think it was because I have any attachment to you. It was a bet.

NEBULON: "Okay, now you'll have to completly disobey your master, and I'll give you Space Creds?"

CHARLES: Funny, but no. I was bet to irritate Tampo in the worst way ever. So I set out to get fired. We will now keep moving.

{An army of enemies storm out of the door.}

NEBULON: I'll take care of this. WITH FIREPOWER!

{He uses his orange balls attack to dispose of all of them. Stlunko also comes out of the door.}

STLUNKO: Stop. I do not wish to attack you. I don't wish to help you, either. You see, that house-- yes, it is. All the logs also belong to me. I attack all the Master's eneimies.

NEBULON: Tampo?

STLUNKO: Yes, Tampo. The Master hates all of Stinkoman's creations. Good-bye.

{He goes back into the building.}

NEBULON: Saargsson!

CHARLES: How, exactly, did that remind you of a lava demon?

NEBULON: He could be our new ally!

CHARLES: Why do you want a new ally?

NEBULON: So we can have enough power to destroy Tampo! It's perfect!

CHARLES: Perfectlly stupid, you mean? Saargsson does not want anything to do with anyone!

NEBULON: Trust me, it'll work.

{Cut to Saargsson's chambers.}

NEBULON: Hi, we're here to see your boss.

CHARLES: He misspoke. He meant he, alone, is here to see his own death.

FIREY-HOT: I'm sorry, but a frosty new aquantance drained Master Saargsson's energy. An Ice Machine, I believe. We have bounties on him and everything, so the quicker he's caught, the quicker you can see my master.

NEBULON: Thanks, we'll be back.

{Cut to Nebulon's base.}

NEBULON: {typing} That did not go over as smoothly as I thought. Too bad I couldn't find an ally. Oh well, keep emailing me, and I will keep yelling at you.

{The Paper falls.}

Easter Eggs

  • Click on "yelling" to see other names for Sayo-Shim-Sam.
    • Mayo-Sandwich-Spam
    • Super-Shimmy-Sap
    • Sham-Shim-Spam
  • Click on "ally" to see this message:

Fun Facts

Inside References


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