Other Character Email Jaro/coolerbody

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CAST:Jaro, Chorch, Grundy, Greggo, My Benji, Tampo

SUMMERY:Jaro builds himself a new robot body.

LINES:100

TRANSCRIPT

JARO: One email for 10 dollars.

Dear Jaro,
Why are you a Jaro?
Why don't you, like, steal some other COOLER robot body and
put your brain chip in it.
Your aspirin-
Someone

JARO: {Typing.} Why am I a Jaro? I don't really know. I've been a Jaro all my life. Except for that time when me and Chorch switched bodys for a day.

{Cut to a field. Jaro and Chorch are there.}

CHORCH: {Jaros voice.} So..hands...pfff. So diffrent.

JARO: {Chorches voice.} I can't float. Why Not!? I command thy body to float! {Falls over.} Oh no. How do I get up? {Rolls down a hill.} AAAAAAaaaaahhhhhhhhhh...{Crash is heard.}

CHORCH: {Jaros voice.} Uh-oh.

{Cut back to the trio at the computer.}

JARO: I didn't enjoy that. Especially the part where my visor cracked.

GRUNDY: Took alot of Krazy Glue to fix it.

JARO: Krazy Glue? You said you welded it!

CHORCH: Never mind that. Anyway someone,you can't just steal a body. Robot bodys are kept under surveillance at Body Depot.

JARO: And you definitely can't steal a body thats being used. I know, I've tryed.

{Cut to a darkened bedroom. A Greggo is in the bed. Jaro comes in the scene and is carrying a knife.}

GREGGO: {Asleep.} That severed Jaro visor? Yeah, I got that when he broke into my house. I told him not to move another foot, but he didn't listen.

{Jaro backs away slowly and then quickly leaves. Cut back to the trio at the computer.}

JARO: Though being in a diffrent body does sound cool.

GRUNDY: Why don't you build a new body?

JARO: Great idea!

CHORCH: We don't know anything about making bodys.

JARO: Thats never stopped me before!

CHORCH: Yes it has.

JARO: You're right. Mabey our minions know something about making bodys. {Pulls up a microphone with a cord and when he talks through it, his voice booms.} Attention all minions. Please begin construction on a new body.

MY BENJI: {Offscreen.} Thats a refrence to Tampo emails!

JARO: Shut up! Allright, what do we do untill they're done?

GRUNDY: Lets play video games! {Cut to a screen that says "4 hours later." When it fades in, Jaro, Chorch and Grundy are playing a videogame.}

CHORCH: You should go check on how those guys are doing.

JARO: Fine... {Gets up. Cut to a diffrent room, where a bunch of My Benji are. Tools and pieces of wood and metal are on the floor.} Okay My Benji, status report.

MY BENJI: Well, due to the fact that none of us have arms, progress is slow.

JARO: How much have you finished?

MY BENJI: Zero percent.

JARO: {Groans.} When will you have it finished?

MY BENJI: By the rate were going, approxamatly one trillion and 5 years.

JARO: Great. I knew I couldn't count on you. If you want something done right, you got to do it yourself.

{Cut to Jaro hard at work on an unseen thing.}

JARO: Duct tape. {Grundy hands him a roll of tape.}.... Empty bottle. {Chorch hands him a dirty empty bottle.} I've done it!!!

GRUNDY: Success!

{Pan out to see Jaros montrosity. It is a poorly made body, with a strainer for a head, an ice cooler for a body, two rakes for hands, a coil for one leg, a vacuum for another leg.}

CHORCH: Is that it!?

JARO: Yeah...

GRUNDY: Man. That s-

JARO: Yeah yeah. Anyway, deactivate me and throw my chip in the body.

CHORCH: Kay. {Fiddles with some stuff on Jaros back, and his eyes fade to darkness. He pulls out a chip.}

GRUNDY: He just wants us to throw it in there?

CHORCH: Thats what he said. {Throws Jaros brain chip into the robot. It lights up and starts to move. It talks in Jaros voice.}

ROBOT: Testing...1, 2, 3. Is this on?

GRUNDY: It works!

ROBOT: Yes! Wow. I feel powerfull.

CHORCH: You're 11 feet tall. You are taller than Tampo.

ROBOT: Do you know what that means?

GRUNDY: You're gonna buy us some soup?

ROBOT: No I- Why do you want soup?

GRUNDY: Soup is natures goodness!

ROBOT: Right...Anyway, like I said; I could overthrow Tampo! I would be JARO, RULER OF ALL MINIONS FROM LEVELS ONE TO THREE!!!

CHORCH: Cool.

ROBOT: Lets go! {Cut to the inside of Tampos Lunar Warehouse, where Tampo appears to be answering an email, by himself.}

TAMPO: ...and thats why you should never put toast in the microwave. So in conclusion, a-

ROBOT: {Offscreen.} I got you now!!

TAMPO: {Turns and looks, frightend.} Ahh! W-Who are you?!

{Camera pans out to see a silhouette of Jaros robot, along with silhouettes of Grundy and Chorch holding Jaros old body. When silhouetted, the robot looks impressive and frightning.}

ROBOT: Who am I? {Starts walking foward.} WHO AM I?! {Tampo whimpers in fear.} I AM YOUR WORST NIGHTMARE!!!!!!

TAMPO: AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

{The silhouette disappears to show the unimpresseve minions.}

TAMPO: Huh? {Angry.} Is this a joke?!

ROBOT: Uh...yeah. A joke. Hee hee.

GRUNDY: Yeah. I mean, do you really think we'd try to overthrow you?

TAMPO: I suppose you're right. I mean, if you tryed to, I'd have you vaporized in seconds. Tee hee.

CHORCH: You're not gonna kill us?

TAMPO: No! I like a good joke now and then! Now you can go now! But, Jaro.

ROBOT: Yes Master Tampo?

TAMPO: Get out of that ridiculous body.

ROBOT: Okay. {Hits a button on his chest, causing the chip to eject out and fall to the ground. Chorch picks it up and places it in Jaros body and he quickly reactivates.}

JARO: We'll be leaving now. Bye!

TAMPO: Glad you could stop by!

{The trio leave. Cut back to the X-5.}

JARO: {Typing.} Well someone, there you go. It goes to show you. You should stick with the body you have, or chances are, you'll build a crappy one and try to overthrow your master. {Stops typing.} So untill next time, send me a good email. One that won't get me killed. {The words "Click here to email Jaro" appear onscreen.}

EASTER EGGS

  • Click on "build" to see some My Benji.

{Cut to the work room. A bunch on My Benji are slowly carrying a screwdriver towards a screw, being carefull not to drop it.}

MY BENJI: Almost there. {Drops screwdriver.} Crap.

FUN FACTS

  • "Never put toast in a microwave" is a referance to Bonus Stage #9, Morbid.


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