PBTC The Cheat Email/killing

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Contents

PBTC The Cheat Email #52 killing

Summary

The Cheat thinks of ways to kill Homsar.

Cast(in order of appearance)

The Cheat, Strong Mad, Homsar, Homestar, Marzipan, Strong Sad,

Here We GO!

THE CHEAT: Would you like to check a be-u-tiful C-Mail? {Types Cheatmail.exe; email pops up}

Hey The Cheat,
If you hate Homsar so much,
why don't you kill him?
-TheCheese

THE CHEAT: {reading email} Hey The Cheat, of course you hate Homsar. So kill him. From TheCheese again {loudly} SINCE NO ONE EMAILS ME BESIDES HIM ANYMORE!

STRONG MAD: {offscreen} C-MAIL HIM NOW! C-MAIL HIM NOW!

THE CHEAT: Anyways, I've thought about killing Homsar many, many times before. I mean, MANY, MANY TIMES.

STRONG MAD: {offscreen} SHOW THEM NOW! SHOW THEM NOW! {A telephone is thrown onscreen}

THE CHEAT: Okay. Well, a few nights ago, I had a few nights ago. {Cut to The Cheat tossing and turning in bed} Evil...Homsar...DIE!...snore. {Cut to Homsar tied to a pole}

HOMSAR: Lunar Jesters, why you getting up in my griiiiiiiiiiiill?

THE CHEAT: {offscreen} Ready, guys? {Cut to Homestar, Marzipan, and Strong Sad oddly holding guns}

HOMESTAR: How do you fire this? Look through the black dot? {Homestar looks into the "black dot"}

MARZIPAN: I think guns are wrong and extremely stupid and... {A gunshot is heard} YOU'RE DEAD HOMESTAR! {Marzipan runs offscreen, gun cocked}

STRONG SAD: I'm sad that I'm holding a gun awkwardly.

THE CHEAT: {back at his computer} And there was also this time where {Cut to Homestar and The Cheat on the wing of a moving airplane. The Cheat has a parachute} All right, whatshisname! Jump!

HOMSAR: Don't look at me, Thatkidsam! I might disassemble! {Homsar jumps}

THE CHEAT: Well, that was easy. {The Cheat walks back into the plane. Cut to The Field. Strong Sad is pacing}

STRONG SAD: I'm sad that I'm probably at the wrong place at the wrong time. {Homsar falls on Strong Sad} Ow!

HOMSAR: Don't fret, Strong sader! I saved the Color Printer! {Cut back to The Cheat at his computer}

THE CHEAT: And that one time that {Cut to Homsar and The Cheat in The Field}

HOMSAR: Why are you nervous Mitchell00? The show doesn't start 'til nooooooooooooooooooooooooooon!

THE CHEAT: Why don't you step back about two steps?

HOMSAR: Only if Ultrapoopaw dusts my sockies!

THE CHEAT: Sure, just go.

HOMSAR: Yes, Hagurumon! {Homsar steps back into the death hole} DaAaAaAaAaAa!

HOMESTAR: {in the death hole} Watch it, Bub! I was here first!

THE CHEAT: {back at his computer} Well, Homsar is just about impossible to kill. Unless {The Cheat mumbles illegibly and snickers} Well, see you next day. I've gotta plot!

{The Printer Falls, ejecting a CD reading "Homsar Killing for Dummies"}

Easter Eggs

  • Click the CD to ee what happened with Homestar and Marzipan.

Transcript

{Cut to The Field. Marzipan and Homestar are chasing eachother around, still shooting}

MARZIPAN: WATCH OUT HOMESTAR!

HOMESTAR: {falls in the death hole} AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhh. My body and heart.


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