Other Character Email 1-Up/realworld

From Homestar Runner Fanstuff Wiki

1-UP EMAIL 126!

I think everything was back to normal in the last email... or was it?! That's right. The end of the last email was a joke.

Cast (in order of appereance): Sticklyman Jr., 1-Up, Mitchell, The Chibilichi, Cheatball

Transcript

{Cut to 1-Up walking into his ship}

STICKLYMAN JR.: Hey, Kidst-

1-UP: {interrupts, trying to correct him} 1-UP!

STICKLYMAN JR.: Right, right. 1-Up. Why are you on this ship without your alternate selve's permission?

1-UP: Meh, he let me keep this ship because he became president of Planet K.

STICKLYMAN JR.: Well, we still have to find out if this place is an alternate universe, the future or the past...?

1-UP: Yeah, you're right. {short pause} Wait a second. Where'd you run off to in the last email?

STICKLYMAN JR.: I thought we weren't going to acknowledge the fourth wall.

1-UP: Pfft. It doesn't matter. As long as we all get some in the end.

{1-Up runs into another room}

STICKLYMAN JR.: {waving his arms like Stinkoman} SOME WHAT?!

{Cut to 1-Up in the main computer room of the ship, entering through one of those Star Trek styled doors and sitting down on a hovering stool near the computer}

1-UP: Woah. What a futuristic world we live in! Ahem. {singing} The following email, is a rap email!

{The email pops up onscreen}

Dear 1-Up,
Did you know that you, your friends,
and all of your actions are controlled
by someone else? Well, what are you
gonna do about it?
-Mr. Cradgage

1-UP: {reading in a funky rap style, followed by rap music} Dear 1-Up. Did you know that you, your friends and a- a- all of y- ARGH! {music cuts off} Forget this!

{1-Up reads the entire email normally and then starts typing}

1-UP: {typing} What?! My entire life?! Controlled by- Wait. I already knew that. Omega and Alpha have the technology to...

{Cut to the real world, Mitchell is on his computer}

MITCHELL: WHAT?! 1-Up knows?!

{Mitchell grabs a chair and goes on to the computer, starting to type}

MITCHELL: {typing} Now that 1-Up knows that his actions are being controlled, he is complaining to me. Why'd you have to send that email?! Signed, Mitchell. {clicks 'enter' on the keyboard} Let's see what his reply is.

{He goes back to what he was doing before. Creating the 1-Up email in a Microsoft Word Document on the computer. Cut back to 1-Up at his computer in the fake universe}

1-UP: I shall go on a quest to find the person that made my email show- Wait! No, I won't!

MITCHELL: {voice only} I knew that'd work.

1-UP: Instead I shall... go on a quest to find out who created my email show!

STICKLYMAN JR.: Isn't that the same thing?

1-UP: Beef jerky!

STICKLYMAN JR.: Whatever. Stinkoman was right. You aren't worthy of being the guy. Why am I allying with you?

{Cut back to Mitchell in the real world checking for replies}

MITCHELL: {reads Mr. Cradgage's reply} I wanted to see how he would react. WHAT?! {typing} Fine! Whatever! Do what you wa-

{1-Up suddenly jumps out of the computer and smashes into Mitchell}

1-UP: Wow. That was weird. Oh, hey Strong Bad!

MITCHELL: ARGH! Get off of me!

{Mitchell types something new on the computer as 1-Up gets up off him}

MITCHELL: {typing} Well, he is going to destroy reality and-

1-UP: HEY! You're that dude that is taking away my free will!

{1-Up kicks Mitchell in the stomach}

MITCHELL: WAGH!

1-UP: That was for the plot holes! {kicks again} That one was for making me die over and over! {kicks Mitchell out of the room and makes him crash through the wall} THAT IS FOR MAKING ME THINK I WAS KIDSTAR!

{Mitchell walks back into his room}

MITCHELL: Look, I'll be willing to fix everything if you just return to your own fake universe.

1-UP: F- {beep} you! I'm a free-person now! You no longer control me! I'm out to explore the world!

MITCHELL: Tone down the lanuage. You still have an email show you know.

{Mitchell gets up off the ground}

1-UP: Oh, right. Umm, well, you're fired. I'll make up my own email show.

MITCHELL: Whatever. It's all yours now.

{Mitchell leaves}

1-UP: Yay! Okay, what should my first email be about. {thinks} Hmm.

{The holigraphic paper comes down, then the paper goes back up again}

1-UP: Wait! I got it! I can make an OCE on Mr. Bland!

{1-Up walks over to the computer}

1-UP: Oh, wait. Mr. Bland's been taken.

{Mitchell comes back in}

MITCHELL: I suggest you get back before people suspect something! You are already drawing attention! I promise, if you go back into the computer, I'll change everything! I swear!

1-UP: You promise?

MITCHELL: Well, not really actually. You see, I already have the rest of Season 3 planned, and it doesn't make sense, but during Season 4 I'll make a storyline that makes sense!

1-UP: Okay then. But, how will you continue the current 1-Up email?

MITCHELL: I don't know. How about you make something up?

1-UP: It's your email show!

MITCHELL: Hmm, I think I have an idea.

{Cut to Stinkoman in Strong Bad's dark basement with the Chibi and the Cheatball}

STINKOMAN: IS THIS SOME WAY OF ASKING FOR A DOUBLE-CHEAT CHALLENGE?!

{Cheatball bounces up and down}

CHEATBALL: Cheatball!

{1-Up walks in and stares at Cheatball}

1-UP: {laughs} Hahahaha! Wow! Cheatball is so cool!

{Cut back to the real world with 1-Up and Mitchell looking at Mitchell's computer sceen}

1-UP: That doesn't make sense! First of all, I'm more then certain that the Cheatball is made of chocolate pudding.

MITCHELL: No. I don't think he is.

1-UP: Shut up!

{1-Up attempts to kick Mitchell, and Mitchell jumps out of the way}

MITCHELL: Come on, 1-Up! USE YOUR FISTS!

1-UP: I don't have any!

MITCHELL: Really? {rubs own chin with hand and looks at 1-Up, as if he were thinking} Interesting.

1-UP: Isn't that kind of obvious?

MITCHELL: {gets out a notepad and writes in it} Huh? What? Sorry. I wasn't paying attention. But, aren't your hands invisible or something?

1-UP: No.

MITCHELL: Oh, then nevermind. Hey, err, do you enjoy food?

1-UP: Yes, I do. I mostly like pudding.

MITCHELL: Then you are going to love what I cooked the other day!

{Mitchell exits the room and comes back in with an annoyed face}

MITCHELL: {annoyed} You ate the pudding, diddn't you?

1-UP: Would you believe me if I said no?

MITCHELL: No.

1-UP: Okay then. Yes.

MITCHELL: Yes?

1-UP: Yes!

MITCHELL: {shouting} NO!

{Mitchell punches 1-Up, making him fall to the ground, screaming in pain}

1-UP: {gets up} Listen, I think I got an idea.

MITCHELL: Huh?

1-UP: Could I just retire here? After all, my emails aren't even animated, they are just a bunch of scripts. Couldn't you make another 1-Up and start all of this again?

MITCHELL: That'd confuse the viewers.

1-UP: Mitchell, the viewers couldn't get any more confused. You've almost broken every rule of physics.

MITCHELL: I suppose you could retire and I could start designs on a new 1-Up, but I have to summmarize the end of our current plot into one email.

{Cut to 1-Up on his very first computer, the Lappy 486 with tape and damaged parts all over it}

1-UP: {heavy reverb} Now would everyone please rise for are national anthem email.

{An email very slowly fizzles on to the screen as if it were a Powerpoint Presentation}

Notícia má 1-Up,
Marzichan foi batido apenas pelo caminhão! Necessita comer seu pudim se você quiser seu vivo.

1-UP: What's this rubbish? Necessita ate Marzichan's hair? Are you sure? We better do something about that- OH MY JARO!

{The camera zooms out, as 1-Up gets off his stool, to find a paper on the ground}

1-UP: It's Strong Bad's "the Paper", and it appears to be dead.

{"To Be Continued..." appears at the top of the screen in white writing. Cut back to the real world to see Mitchell and 1-Up looking at the computer again}

MITCHELL: 1-UP! I told you that copying Strong Bad emails is not good!

1-UP: Huh? What? You're the one who write it.

MITCHELL: Nevermind. How about I just return you to the exact moment this problem started?

1-UP: You can do that?

MITCHELL: I can now!

{Mitchell gets out his Nintendo DS and removes a tiny stick-type object from it. Then he uses it to opens a portal and pushes 1-Up into it with his shoulder. Suddenly, it cuts to 1-Up on Planet X standing next to Zim and Gir}

1-UP: What's going on?! Huh?! Where am I?! How'd I- Zim?!

ZIM: {offscreen} We're all doomed! DOOMED!

{1-Up runs over to his ship and gets in. He prepares to blast off. Cut to an outside view of the planet. The planet explodes and we see Dark Stinkoman's ship make it out on time, although this leaves the viewers in suspense due to 1-Up's possible death}

NARRATOR: {voice only} Did 1-Up survive the explosion? Is this the end of Planet X? Will this somehow destroy the timeline? Why am I still asking questions? We'll find out all these answers and more in the next 1-Up email.

{The holigraphic paper comes down telling the viewers to "Wait for the next email..."}

Easter Eggs

• If you click on the word "next email", you'll see a quick video clip of Sticklyman Jr. and Alternate 1-Up.

Easter Egg Transcript

{Cut to Sticklyman Jr. in Alternate 1-Up's ship}

STICKLYMAN JR.: He left without me, diddn't he?

{Alternate 1-Up nods his head and then tilts it to the side}

STICKLYMAN JR.: That crap-face!

Fun Facts

Trivia

• The door which open much like elevator doors are similar to Star Trek.
  • I'm not a fan of Star Trek and I've never heard of it, but Futurama said that they came from Star Trek.
• The real-world sequences are a reference to Tommorow's Nobodies - Episode 5.
  • WARNING: If you click the above link, remember that you have been warned that it contains rude content.
• The ending to this email is almost identical to the ending of this email, due to the tear in time and space in which Mitchell opened.
• Necessita will actually be a future character in 1-Up emails.